As for the other, you have her number, and can watch out.

It’s a shock when you unintentionally stumble on something that shows a real ugly side of someone you associate with. Especially when you thought they were nice people.

I’ve had some of those close encounters.

I know a few. Some I can have a conversation about it with, these are the same people I’ve always been able to debate about politics for years. We argue over drinks, sometimes heatedly, but we’re still friends and family. Some people I never talk about it with because it’s better that way. I still love them but we can’t go there, so we don’t.

Some people I just don’t bother with anymore but we were never really that close to begin with.

People are more than just their political allegiances. I know people from all walks of life, some are Republicans that would give you the shirt off their back, some are Democrats that I wouldn’t trust any further than I could spit a rat and vice versa.

I cope with them situationally.

or that "people are more than their political alliances" it almost make it sound like we are talking about rivalry in sports teams.

Politics alliances reflect so much more of who we really are. How can someone who would give you the shirt of their back vote for someone who has hurt the most vulnerable all his life, and how is using the power of the presidency to destroy those who are in need, who can't defend themselves?

How can someone who is decent and has a good heart vote to give such a monster such power?

How does a good person vote for someone who mocked the disabled, disrespects women wants to take health care away from those who needed the most...well, you know who how he is. A true monster

After the horror at the border, children being torn from their mother's arms....how can anyone either support/be indifferent to so such suffering be a good person?



So to me, political alliances say so much about the core, the moral fiber of someone. It is something I just cant ignore

In the past I could have said something to the effect "its just about politics" and agree not to discuss it with certain people, but what we are dealing with now is NOT politics. This is about basic decency and the imminent threat to democracy.

Trump is not a conservative or a republican, he is tyrannical monster and there can be no rationalizing supporting him.

In the past, I've known people who were self-identified republicans, but they often weren't bad people, just poorly informed. They could be caring and generous in their personal lives, but they really didn't know a lot about government or world affairs. Of course, there were also the "I've got mine" people, who never really cared about anyone's well being but their own. Those people I avoided. Those are the types who were probably first to hop on the Trump train.

After all the things he did while campaigning and still support him while he's president. If I find out someone is a Trump supporter I may still speak to them but cut it short and avoid them if I can.

about who or what he is.

On day one of his hate-filled campaign, he said, "When Mexico sends its people, they're not sending their best. They're sending people that have lots of problems, and they're bringing those problems with us. They're bringing drugs. They're bringing crime. They're rapists. And some, I assume, are good people."

It wasn't subtle, not a dog whistle. He was clearly saying, "I am your racist candidate". Anyone who voted for Trump knew he was a racist with a racist agenda.

It is OK.

A decent, good-heated person could never support this monster.

There are two realms on this matter.
The Microcosm - everything you do that has an effect on your world. Petting a kitty. Doing something nice for a friend. Treating your spouse nice. All of these things are Microcosm and everybody seems to have some sense of this but obviously some are better than it than others.
The other is the Macrocosm - This is much more abstract and difficult to understand. These are thing you can do that have a much bigger impact on other peoples lives. Voting is the obvious one. It takes a fair amount of intelligence and hard work to figure out the impact of Macrocosm issues. Many people don't have a clue in this realm.
-Airplane

With W it was policy disagreements. Profound as they were they had a different feel for me than the Trumpsters. I’ve basically cut every one of them I know out of my life, including one family member. Once the others in the family saw that they learned well enough to steer clear of the subject with me.

I was assaulted by a Trump family member recently because I pointed out a change in tax policy that would eliminate a deduction for the family member. I could have called the law, but I would be homeless if I did.

Last edited Fri Jan 11, 2019, 06:52 AM - Edit history (1)

along with having a knee ground into my chest and hands around my throat trying to choke me. It's been five days and my chest is bruised, my back is hurt and I have nerve pain in my right hip. However, since the family member is a veteran and I've had my share of legal issues so my credibility is low. It doesn't matter how much I suffer since everyone ignores the issue and says the family member has PTSD.

I'm so sorry you have to endure that.

That's not a difference of opinion, that's a crime.

Well, that says everything we would ever want to know about the person who assaulted you. They’re insane.

I’m truly sorry.

She's obviously political on her social media, which none of my friends are.

In real life we just politely agreed not to speak of politics. If the agreement is breached I say my mind and admit we won't be interacting socially if they can't abide by the agreement in the future. It's all about being polite but informed. If we're one on one that's fine, depending on the setting, but if they're invited to a social event, especially when they're the vast minority, it's just rude to spoil an evening.

You're going to have to feel out what's best with her yourself.

Since you saw it only on her Facebook, and she's never been political with you otherwise, you're probably fine and she may just shares what her peers do to make them happy and she isn't really that into politics.

Or, maybe since you're more blue there she feels marginalized? She may feel she can't be political openly and you're safe from any proselytizing of the merits of Trump?

I'm safe from her proselytizing, but I'm avoiding her when I can. In my life, she's the only living embodiment of Trump hate, masked in that warped Christianity. For example, she says she accepts her son -- but she also prays for him because he is gay. I had hoped that her son coming out to her would change her, but it obviously hasn't.

So, ever since I found out about her Trump worship, I really kind of loathe her . . . but I can't avoid her completely. Oh well.

They support a man who is racist, mysogynistic, up to his neck in crimes, a liar and I could go on.
Their support has been and is still incredibly damaging. This is not an argument about policy. It is about basic moral values. There are lines I refuse to cross.

events are manageable. Mostly I ignore them unless it is necessary to mingle for some reason. I am recently retired, but I also made a point to not talk politics with co-workers back in 2016. These so-called nice people made a bad choice and I have no craps to give about them.

The woman I mentioned lives here, and FB isn't the problem -- we're not friends on FB and we're not going to be. I only saw her posts because she makes them publicly available. She doesn't know I have seen them and she can't see mine.

The thing is, I feel like evil walks the earth in leaders like DT, and his fans repulse me. Luckily, she's the only one I run into in real life. I don't know how I'd survive in a red state.

My sister is an evangelical and they believe it was God's plan to put trump in the White House. Therefore he is doing God's will and is bringing about the end as it was written in scripture. Their pastors preach this from the pulpit every week and they are all looking forward to meeting Jesus in a cloud of glory.

to get the Evangelical vote. The people who are Dominionists believe that rich people are rich because they are god's chosen, god saw favor in them. Poor people, on the other hand, sinned against god so he is punishing them.

I also golf with a "pal" 85 years old, Korean war vet, does funerals, did Meals on Wheels, is a devout Catholic. He told me the day that will go down in infamy was the day they gave women the right to vote. He told me that his granddaughter wasn't all bad, she hates blacks and minorities. I then found out he was a Trumper. I tried arguing with him 1 time about Brett Kavanaugh's attempted rape, he being a good Catholic boy. His response was , hey when we were young we all tried to get in a girl's pants.

I learned not to talk politics because their minds are made up, they will not change. I only once in a while throw some snark at them, some zingers about Trump but I know it has no effect on them.

The fact that she lives in Alabama and I live in PA helps too.

I mean, that kinda makes sense as a standalone statement, "this guy is the actual Antichrist," but if these people acknowledge this and still support him because it "immantizes the eschaton" or what the fuck ever...I mean, that's just super fucked up, really.

to be taken to a comet, etc. Evangelicals believe Christ will appear in the clouds when the end struggle begins on earth and in a blink of an eye "the chosen" "them) will be gathered in His arms to be taken to his Father and there they will have eternal life in a place so beautiful we on earth could not imagine it. They also believe that God put trump in place to start the last war. Therefore they rejoice him for what he is going to do for them. And the start the last war part could very well come true. He has the codes and could start a nuclear war. And he certainly is making us the enemy of most of the nations on earth. That is why he is so scary. He is pure evil.

But that’s ok, they think I’m going to hell anyway because I’m not a bible thumper like they are and I drive a Toyota.

with Trumpers at work. It's a small company and most of the guys don't really follow politics anyway, so that seems to work.

on facebook but if they can't, I remove them promptly.

I just ended a 26 yr long BFF relationship with someone that proved to be a racist and told her, bye bye a couple of weeks ago. I had tried to ignore it for at least the past 5 yrs and then when I opened up an email from her on xmas morning complaining about those "fucking Mexicans," I lost it. I wrote her a long letter, edited it a couple of times and waited until the weekend and sent it. She was surprised and told me I was hateful but I couldn't do it anymore. We rarely discussed politics and every time she said something stupid like "if you're in America, you must speak English!" I would go off on her.

It's really upset me to walk away from someone that close to me but I believe that if they are racist to the core, I can't associate with them. I just can't. No regrets.

The lack of self awareness of some of these people is stunning.

to a Trump supporter. They just have such warped thinking.

years ago that I was more liberal than her and she would never talk politics. She claimed she didn't vote for IQ45, but I am certain because of her lies over the years, that she did.

Even in my letter to her, I reminded her that her Irish ancestors and my Italian grand parents were discriminated against for the same reasons she was using to justify her view. Oh, she replied, if they come here Legally, she's okay with that. sigh

Considering she works for the state of AZ investigating folks that apply for food stamps, I think she's in the wrong line of work. She didn't want those F* Mexicans to get food! At xmas!

WTF?

I try to treat them as sympathetically as I can muster, but basically keep my distance for my own safety. There's nothing I can do to help them, really, they won't listen to any kind of logic or reason. It's sad, and I hope some day they may find a way to heal their pathetic, broken minds, but I'm not holding my breath.

Unfortunately, society doesn't quite see it that way, and hasn't taken steps to mitigate the impacts of what I see as a widespread epidemic of mental illness. Maybe someday "authoritarianism" will be recognized as the disease that it is...it's debilitating to society as a whole.

I have completely cut them out of my life. No time for the toxic and stupid.

Was going to right an OP on this but just agree on a neutral source of information like US Today, The AP, Times etc etc ...

Even if its one source its better than nothing.

The problem is MAGA KKKultist are single source fed and don't have a broader view.

Start the conversation there

Two in-laws, and affiliated acquaintances from that side of the family have gone from garden-variety "Ronald Reagan - so dreamy!!!" in the peculiar world they inhabit to straight up Michael Savage/Daily Caller/Breitbart bullshit.

I never broach the topic of politics, and haven't done so for at least 20 years - it's pointless. They, however, go out of their collective way to drag it into conversations by any means necessary: little jabs here, full-throated conspiracy fantasies there, and they can't can't can't shut up about it.

So finally, a year ago Christmas, as SIL in her patented Low And Vicious Attack Voice informed us how wrong and stooopid and oh so damnably liberal we were, I got up, put on my coat, and informed the table that "I don't need this shit anymore" and walked home.

Since then, I've seen them as little as possible beyond obligatory holidays, which is fine with me, and they haven't gone there again. Maybe they got the hint - who cares? I'm not going to pretend to enjoy time I spend with people who have willingly embraced lies, evil and stupidity while telling themselves the cesspool they live in is actually filled with Chanel No. 5.

Give them a big juicy kiss on each cheek,..
Turn them around so they are facing away from you,..
Give them a gentle tap on the fanny,..
(Like five quick little spanks-5 in quick succession,..
And shout out,.. "Get the fuck lost,.. you are just a colossal waist of my time, I'm done with this shit".

Bye-bye !

Bid them adieu.

I avoid my country cousins like the plague.

And I do not talk politics with my friend who
voted for I-1.

He doesn't hear you, and never will

I don't tell them, or "unfriend" them (although I do unfollow). Who needs the drama?

I don't even tell people HERE that I've blocked them. But... I must admit, it's entertaining to see how others make such a big deal and public show about unfriending or blocking.

I don't commune with racist. I have disowned the few I had permanently.

It’s wonderful

Just had a cousin send a friend request--went to his page, saw the stupid and decided to delete request. Have unfollowed or unfriended a few others. In person, we don't talk about it (but I'm always afraid one will be visiting Mom when I'm there--and when they say something political, I may have to leave before breaking with them entirely).
I don't make a point of ignoring them, but keep my distance when possible. (Hey, I've got one uncle that I will only choose to see him at his funeral--to make sure he's really dead--and he has no clue how I feel)

I ignore him as much as possible. When necessary, I tell him to go fuck himself and to keep his political opinions unmentioned. Seems to work.

We were both repelled by the likelihood that 81% of the people in our congregation were Trumpers.

best friend. I love her still and care about her but she voted for trump and I did lose some more respect for her. She thinks what is going on because of him is horrible but never indicated she regrets her vote and decided to be just as bad and not to vote at all anymore. She is the only one I know that voted for him. Well my apartment complex maintained man for him...well , the ast election he voted all blue so he is redeeming himself at least.

No exceptions, no exclusions.

Doesn't work for everyone, but my dad worked for Franco and my mom was IWW. Complete prohibition against EVER raising your voice or being rude regarding what someone else believes or expresses regarding politics or religion; period.

If it isn't worth shooting someone over, it's not worth getting mad or being rude over.

I just feel slightly ill, whenever I have to be around her.

As a anti-theist, to be honest, I am more sickened by having to be in the presence of anyone with an invisible sky-fairy friend than I would be by anyone of any political belief or practice, but in both cases, I remain polite and friendly, and regard anyone who can't and doesn't as merely a primate who has learned to not make messes in the house.

I won't let politics interfere with my personal relationships until it crosses a line into disrespect for myself or my ethics or values. When that happens I tend towards severing contact.

Stepping away from all social media has helped prevent degrading the relationships with friends/family who harbor differing political views.

because DU is social media.



Social media has been a way for me to get back in touch with old friends on the opposite coast, and to stay linked to family members in disparate places. I enjoy sites for both my high school and my hometown that are on FB.

More as an old-school traditional discussion forum that platforms like FB have crept into. DU is a discussion board with very specific focus and user base rather than FB's purported mission of social connection. Yes DU is social but at it's core fundamentally different than what FB is.

I need to add the qualifier that stepping away for me is just that. Stepping away from the accounts I have to minimize their influence I my life. But not that full cutting of the cord and account deletion. I would love to sever them all, but like you some social media platforms are the only realistic way to maintain ease of contact with distant friends or relatives. Feels like a catch-22 at times.

Don't miss it one bit.

For my family members that are Republican, I just talk about something else besides politics (usuall inane stuff like 'how's the cat doing?')

her, because I understand her a lot better now. Her niceness around me doesn't match her Trumper views.

and last week at a party he came up to me and said that he saw some of my fb posts and that we should get together and have a good go-around regarding politics.

I just smiled and said, “No, Bill, there will be no go -around because I only have one thing to say and that is that you are way too smart to be duped by this con man for much longer.”

I picked up my drink and walked away. Ran into him a couple of times later in the evening and no more was said.

I only think of the good things to say while I'm trying to fall asleep . . .

and I worked out a short response that I hoped wouldn’t be something that set him off in anger. That never works. And he isn’t a dumb man so I wanted to appeal to his intellect. No idea if it made a diffetence, but I haven’t seen much success with hard confrontation.

burned any bridges, in case he ever feels like talking.

She text me about a month ago and told me to tune into Faux at such and such a time for an hour long interview with Trump.
I text back this message: The only time I want to see Trump is when he is being escorted from the White House in handcuffs by Federal Marshals...I have not heard from her since nor do I care to.

Barely a peep from them. I think they are having second thoughts or at least they know they don't have a leg to stand on.

otherwise, I keep contact to a bare minimum.

Arguing with them or presenting them with facts only makes me anxious and angry.

I only knew one very well and I just started ignoring him once he revealed his politics. Been about 3 months now since we last spoke. I don't post politically on facebook because I don't like drama. All my regular friends and family think and vote politically like I do, thank goodness. I don't know how I would handle a family Trumper so I'm glad I don't have to.

. . . I am the youngest of five siblings, ranging in age from 68 down to 57 (me). The eldest (a sister), her husband and I constitute the family's left flank. The other three siblings (a brother and two sisters) are all Trump supporters. I have struggled in vain to understand how we could come to hold such diametrically opposed politics -- not to mention values -- having grown up with the same parents in the same household. I wish I could say that, as a family, we had been able to remain above the fray, but sadly, I can't. A real rift has opened between my brother and me, and between one of the other two sisters and me. Both of those rifts pain me deeply.

We have at least gotten to the point that, at family gatherings, we avoid politics like the plague. But I've noticed something curious. Whenever an political argument has flared up, it is my eldest sister and I who get accused of turning the discussion to politics. But what has actually been the case is that my sister or I have sat silent for hours or even days while the three other siblings make some of the most absurdly ridiculous and off-base remarks, and at a certain point have had enough and finally speak up to offer a counter opinion. And then we get accused of making the conversation "political."

I wish I could offer some insight, but I'm afraid I am at a loss.

She knows how liberal I am, so the fact that she won't talk about anything political tells me that she's acquired her husband's libertarian/Republican views since marriage.

Last year, for example, she was talking about one of her young adult children, who had been having some health issues, and can't work, but luckily is on her dads insurance. I said yes, my son has insurance through his dad, too -- it's good that Obamacare did that. No, she said, Obama didn't have anything to do with it -- her husband's office just had a good policy. When I tried to explain that the only reason that good policy covered children up to age 26 was because of the ACA, she shut me down. She wasn't "going there." I was discussing something political and that wasn't allowed.

She wants to continue living in her dreamworld, where her non-working, sick, young-adult daughter still has access to good insurance because her dad picked the right company to work for.

Maybe she'll figure it out when her daughter turns 26 and her only option turns out to be the state exchange . . . if it still exists.

It's not the same with my grandparents now being gone and that's the side of the family that has some rather vocal Branch Trumpvidians. My one aunt loves to start political crap at family gatherings defending her hero Donald Dumbfuck. Beyond that I just don't gel with that side of the family quite as much.

Those will come back and hopefully open their minds to make sure they do their due diligence in the future before they cast their next vote, but most of them will never change because those interested in keeping those masses on their side will find ways for them to continue adoring the orange buffoon.

In a South American country, when their leader died the corrupt who took over the government understood how important for them it was to keep the cult alive, they have now a wax figure of the guy in a coffin where his worshipers can continue to visit and adore, and every time they give a speech, they remind the people of their dead leader, who by many accounts "still lives in them". The president even told the people that their defunct leader had appeared to him in the form of a bird, and he had talked to him...I hope your sister is not one of them, but you can bet evangelicals will try hard to keep the memory of the buffoon alive for as long as they can.

When you figure it out please let me know.

if they don't quit I have my say!

This morning I was browsing the local thrift shop looking for treasures and I overheard 2 older men talking about "the wall." Normally, I mind my own business and carry on, but my ears pricked up when I heard " . . . but you have to admit he's right that we need the wall to keep them from coming in and taking all the benefits I might be getting." I spun around, newly found Winnie the Pooh cake plate in hand, and said to the guy who was in favor of the wall, "I've got 2 words for you: tunnel and ladder. The wall is a stupid idea." He clammed up immediately and the other guy snickered. Later, when I was looking at books, the snickering guy approached me and told me he agreed totally with me and that the Trumphumper guy was an obnoxious loudmouth. Made me happy I'd shut him up for a minute.

As far as I'm concerned, anyone who supports him is as bad as he is. Screw 'em.