My medical flexible spending account owes me $800.
Most of you know what these accounts are, so I won't bother explaining it.
The account administrator has a real nifty website where you can submit your medical bills online, and then they are supposed you reimburse you YOUR OWN FUCKING MONEY for these bills in a timely manner.
The plan administrator has owed me $800 of my own money for ....oh....8 weeks. My account is set up for the money to be direct deposited to my savings account.
I can sign on to their website to check the status of my payment, which I do everyday, because, well, $800 is a lot of money.
After 8 weeks, and about 10 emails and phone calls asking them why they have not yet processed my claim, they finally decided to show me some mercy and process the claim to receive MY OWN GODDAMN FUCKING MONEY, and out of the goodness of their incompetent little hearts, CUT ME A MOTHERFUCKING CHECK FOR $800 and mailed it to me about 10 days ago. It was mailed from the same state that I reside in, and I still have not received the check, BECAUSE IT IS EITHER LOST IN THE MAIL OR THE USPS IS HOLDING IT UP. Again, I should be RECEIVING A DIRECT DEPOSIT INSTEAD OF A PAPER CHECK. When I asked why I did not receive a direct deposit instead of a paper check, considering that my account was set up as direct deposit, the response after my 10th communication with them was "oops! I forgot to check a box".
The reason some of this is typed in all caps is because I am too lazy to walk down to my garage to get my sledge hammer to smash the holy dogshit out of my keyboard, CPU and monitor. Typing in all caps takes some of the stress off.
Everything, and I mean everything, is broken in Trumpland.
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