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boston bean

(36,186 posts)
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:09 AM Jun 2014

Police officer came to my house last night.

Scared the ever loving shit out of me. Keep in mind, that the last and only time police were at my house was to deliver the news that a family member was at the hospital and they subsequently died. The family member was already dead, but was brought by ambulance to the hospital.

My husband had gone to play cards with his buddies and my son had left 5-10 minutes prior to meet up with some friends at the baseball field.

I want to set the scene. I have a custom split. At the front door, stairs lead up to a hallway right into the kitchen and stairs below that lead into an additional family room. I had just finished dinner and was cleaning the mess at the kitchen sink, which is literally 10 steps from the stair way in a direct line to the front door. I can see the door from the kitchen sink. I was rinsing the dishes putting them into the dishwasher.

All of the sudden I hear the door bell being rung very aggressively, over and over and over. I immediately turn walk quickly and get to the top of the stairs, in the meantime of my quickly walking to the door, yelling I'm coming, the screen door is opened and pounding begins on the door itself. My door does not have a window, but there are two slender windows on each side of the door where when I get to the door I can see out. I did not know it was the police.

So, I get to the door look out the side window and see a town police officer standing there. My heart starts pounding, my blood drains to my feet. My son and husband have just left the house. I am beginning to freak. The way the officer was ringing the door bell and pounding on the door, struck a fear in me I cannot describe, surely something is very very wrong and it is emergent!

I immediately open the door and immediately ask what is wrong. He says, "nothing". He looks at me like I'm crazy for asking. I said if nothing is wrong what the fuck are you ringing on my door bell like that for and pounding on my door. My adrenaline from fear has put me in a state where I could not control what words were coming out of my mouth. I said holy fucking shit. The last time police came to my house they were here to deliver some very bad news.

He says to me do you have a son named.... I said yes I do. Again, now I'm like what is wrong????? He said well, your son is driving like an idiot doing donuts in some lot at a park in town. We want to see him at the police station. He's not at the park any longer. Have in come talk to us. He leaves.

So, I immediately ring, text my son to tell him the police have been to the house and they are looking for him. I could not reach him. After about 15 minutes it dawned on me that he probably doesn't have his phone on him, and is probably playing ball somewhere. So, I get in the car to find him, fearing now that the cops are out looking for my son because they came to the house so aggressively.

So first, I go to the park my son said he was going to be at, and lo and behold, he was right there in the parking lot, his car parked near the field he had just been playing ball in. He was talking to his friends by another car. I asked him to get in into my car so I could speak with him. I told him everything I had just stated above. My son said that was nuts and he was shocked. He wasn't doing any donuts in the parking. He had made a circle in the lot to turn around. I could also tell that was the case, because the parking lot is a dirt parking lot and there were not marks of someone just doing donuts there. Also, he had left the house, went straight to the park and had never left from there. He had been there the whole time.

The cop had never gone to the field. Someone concerned citizen must have called the cops... Someone?? I have no idea who it is????? My son drove home shortly after and I told him to take my car if he was going out again. He has never had a ticket, or an accident. He did not go to the police station, and I didn't make him.

I know this story's ending pales in comparison to some things we read here and in the end not a big deal. But hell, I when it was happening, I was terrified by the town police. Terrified that something life threatening had occurred. Terrified that cops were out looking for my son. On a citizen complaint, where they didn't even bother going to the scene where the alleged complaint had taken place. They need a bit more sensitivity training.

124 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Police officer came to my house last night. (Original Post) boston bean Jun 2014 OP
Are you sure the police are done with the matter? NutmegYankee Jun 2014 #1
I think so. I hope so! boston bean Jun 2014 #3
Unless they gave him a written notice of some sort I don't see how they could just pnwmom Jun 2014 #6
I'm more concerned that the officer will escalate it because he was ignored. NutmegYankee Jun 2014 #10
Then they should call a lawyer -- and NOT send a kid to the police without representation. pnwmom Jun 2014 #11
I agree with that. NutmegYankee Jun 2014 #13
Exactly. H2O Man Jun 2014 #32
Of course they don't need to do that. sulphurdunn Jun 2014 #121
My concern as well. Get a lawyer and go to the police station. Put it to bed. Fla Dem Jun 2014 #38
Criminal offense of what? Michigander_Life Jun 2014 #8
There is no statutory responsibility to pipoman Jun 2014 #9
absolutely agree. reflection Jun 2014 #51
Yes, never talk to the cops sulphurdunn Jun 2014 #120
I would have been scared too,,,, KarenS Jun 2014 #2
Just fyi... pipoman Jun 2014 #4
+10000000000 pnwmom Jun 2014 #7
What about someone who wants to take responsibility for their actions? Michigander_Life Jun 2014 #12
They still should do it with legal counsel. . pipoman Jun 2014 #15
They can do that with the assistance of an attorney. nt. Mariana Jun 2014 #44
Requied viewing...Dont talk to police Rhinodawg Jun 2014 #47
Thank you, I've seen it. Good thing, too. Mariana Jun 2014 #74
Always go with legal council blackspade Jun 2014 #69
Never EVER Aerows Jun 2014 #78
Yeah, always trust authority, right? Because they're never, ever wrong, or dishonest... nomorenomore08 Jun 2014 #99
Sounds like a good LTTE to your local paper. Maybe even call up a news station. MADem Jun 2014 #5
I was not in any frame of mind at the time to remember to get the officers name. boston bean Jun 2014 #14
Just make sure he knows what to do if he is questioned pipoman Jun 2014 #18
I will. Thanks pipoman! boston bean Jun 2014 #20
kids tend to believe they can talk their way out of anything pipoman Jun 2014 #31
You might want to rethink that. missingthebigdog Jun 2014 #21
this, too. ms liberty Jun 2014 #33
Yes--and maybe start a diary about it, for further documentation-- tblue37 Jun 2014 #80
Find out what the laws are about recording in your state, and if One Party Consent is OK, MADem Jun 2014 #23
LOL. The driver at the 6 minute mark opened a can of woop ass on the scammer NutmegYankee Jun 2014 #73
Oh you know it! Those "Russian car video" compilations are hilarious--it's the kind of thing where MADem Jun 2014 #86
What happened really makes no sense to me as to why it Tuesday Afternoon Jun 2014 #16
I would talk to a lawyer madaboutharry Jun 2014 #17
For what possible reason? former9thward Jun 2014 #39
To put on record her son's version of events and that madaboutharry Jun 2014 #46
The visit was not improper. former9thward Jun 2014 #50
How about a cop visit out of the blue? damnedifIknow Jun 2014 #68
The intimidation and the "You'd better tell your son with the driver's license..." routine was. MADem Jun 2014 #88
No one got charged. former9thward Jun 2014 #94
You know something, this is the second time that I've seen in this thread boston bean Jun 2014 #104
And you continue creating a tempest in a teapot. former9thward Jun 2014 #106
What tempest have I created? boston bean Jun 2014 #107
You know I really hope you take the various posters' advice. former9thward Jun 2014 #110
If your so interested read through the thread and find out for yourself my probable course of action boston bean Jun 2014 #111
Good luck to you and have a nice day... former9thward Jun 2014 #113
Because nobody in their right mind trusts fucking cops anymore. alphafemale Jun 2014 #66
All or Nothing LeftFieldMom Jun 2014 #117
Oh, Look! Look at what I found! alphafemale Jun 2014 #119
Like another poster, I don't think this story is over yet. Savannahmann Jun 2014 #19
Not exactly pipoman Jun 2014 #28
I've seen several cases where one police officer trumped many other witnesses. Savannahmann Jun 2014 #34
Going to jail to await charges is the tool police use to get people pipoman Jun 2014 #48
I couldn't agree more, with one exception. Savannahmann Jun 2014 #63
That only matters in a court. NutmegYankee Jun 2014 #40
True, fear of arrest isn't a good reason to act with haste pipoman Jun 2014 #52
ugh, crazy. I'm sorry that happened. Cops can be total pricks. PeaceNikki Jun 2014 #22
I'm guessing you're white. NightWatcher Jun 2014 #24
Something isn't quite adding up Caretha Jun 2014 #25
I once had a boss who was lead law enforcement officer for the state attorney general pipoman Jun 2014 #27
Yep--because then they can create evidence to back up a false narrative. nt tblue37 Jun 2014 #87
The police always have the right Mariana Jun 2014 #45
Really? Caretha Jun 2014 #103
You understand the key word is ASK, right? Mariana Jun 2014 #114
Gotcha Caretha Jun 2014 #124
most likely License plate on the car JI7 Jun 2014 #101
Get an attorney for your son. This might not be over. That's first. Second, msanthrope Jun 2014 #26
I find myself in the unusal position of agreeing with you Savannahmann Jun 2014 #35
I think Satan just told Hitler to fire up the Zamboni!!! msanthrope Jun 2014 #36
No need for an attorney. former9thward Jun 2014 #43
I disagree, and I am not an attorney Savannahmann Jun 2014 #55
I am a lawyer and always encourage people to stay away from our legal system. former9thward Jun 2014 #60
This prevents the boy from being arrested how? Savannahmann Jun 2014 #64
Your links are interactions with the police. former9thward Jun 2014 #79
I think "grabbing his traffic vest" was significant in Example #1. WinkyDink Jun 2014 #105
Let me guess....not a criminal defense attorney? Because I am. And I still msanthrope Jun 2014 #77
The only thing I have ever done is prosecution and defense. former9thward Jun 2014 #84
this is getting blown out of proportion dem in texas Jun 2014 #93
Yes, people are posting like SWAT is gathering outside of the door. former9thward Jun 2014 #95
the police are not your friends KG Jun 2014 #29
+1000 nt Logical Jun 2014 #49
Friend of Foe LeftFieldMom Jun 2014 #118
That sucks. MannyGoldstein Jun 2014 #30
Sounds to me... 2naSalit Jun 2014 #37
You've had some good advice here DawgHouse Jun 2014 #41
Someone decided to ANONAMOUSLY call the police. Rhinodawg Jun 2014 #42
what kind of car does he have? rear wheel drive? snooper2 Jun 2014 #53
He has all wheel drive. can one do donuts with all wheel drive?? boston bean Jun 2014 #56
of course snooper2 Jun 2014 #57
I bet he wishes he had a car like that! boston bean Jun 2014 #58
you don't, it's just putting raw power to the ground with some good steering control snooper2 Jun 2014 #59
Yes, but azureblue Jun 2014 #62
False accusations suck, don't they? n/t lumberjack_jeff Jun 2014 #54
I wondered if anyone would pick up on that fact... Tireman Jun 2014 #115
If you are concerned aboutyour kid getting stopped azureblue Jun 2014 #61
Do you have link or app... Rhinodawg Jun 2014 #65
Agree with the lawyer advice BUT packman Jun 2014 #67
Proof is needed. If their are witnesses pointing fingers then those witnesses need to come forward. Lint Head Jun 2014 #70
Good, you didn't take him to the station MrScorpio Jun 2014 #71
Good advice. ucrdem Jun 2014 #76
These are cops. They heard he was making donuts. And they want him to report to the police station. jtuck004 Jun 2014 #72
LOL! Time to make errrr bring the donuts! boston bean Jun 2014 #91
It sounds like someone living by the park is reporting these incidents R B Garr Jun 2014 #75
False accusations mainstreetonce Jun 2014 #81
You must have been terrified. Squinch Jun 2014 #82
Thanks Squinch! boston bean Jun 2014 #83
wow. i would call cops and talk to a supervisor Liberal_in_LA Jun 2014 #85
Let a criminal defense lawyer do that. Rhinodawg Jun 2014 #90
when dealing with cops always remember awoke_in_2003 Jun 2014 #89
You could live in our town rosesaylavee Jun 2014 #92
I've had that feeling before laundry_queen Jun 2014 #96
i'm glad everyone is well. barbtries Jun 2014 #97
I know police have been in the news lately, but nothing really happened here LittleBlue Jun 2014 #98
I agree. LisaL Jun 2014 #100
Can you let me know how you know what happened at my house? boston bean Jun 2014 #102
Uh... paragraphs 4-7? LittleBlue Jun 2014 #108
I stated somewhere that the I didn't hear the cop ringing the door bell and pounding on my door? boston bean Jun 2014 #109
I wish the cops would catch the little hoodlums doing doughnuts in the middle B Calm Jun 2014 #112
If the cops really want to talk to him, they'll come back by the house and ask for him again. Lex Jun 2014 #116
Wow, boston bean, your story was written very well to describe the anxiety unprofessional Jefferson23 Jun 2014 #122
Have had the cops called on me for "driving like a drunk" a couple times in one small crappy town I MillennialDem Jun 2014 #123

NutmegYankee

(16,177 posts)
1. Are you sure the police are done with the matter?
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:15 AM
Jun 2014

They might see his not showing up as some kind of criminal offense and go after him.

To those replying - I grew up in small Southern town politics. Legalities are meaningless in such a corrupt society.
That is one reason I'm such a stanch Civil Libertarian and actual card carrying member of the ACLU.

boston bean

(36,186 posts)
3. I think so. I hope so!
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:18 AM
Jun 2014

But you make a good point, and something I will give much thought to in how to proceed.

pnwmom

(108,925 posts)
6. Unless they gave him a written notice of some sort I don't see how they could just
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:22 AM
Jun 2014

send a message through his mother and consider it criminal not to respond.

NutmegYankee

(16,177 posts)
10. I'm more concerned that the officer will escalate it because he was ignored.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:25 AM
Jun 2014

I grew up with small town bullshit and it wasn't beneath an officer to make up a reason to justify escalating the matter.

pnwmom

(108,925 posts)
11. Then they should call a lawyer -- and NOT send a kid to the police without representation.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:27 AM
Jun 2014

If anyone needs to contact the police, it should be a lawyer.

 

sulphurdunn

(6,891 posts)
121. Of course they don't need to do that.
Mon Jun 23, 2014, 08:51 AM
Jun 2014

On the other hand, If you can afford to, it might send a message that you aren't somebody they want to mess with over nothing.

Fla Dem

(23,351 posts)
38. My concern as well. Get a lawyer and go to the police station. Put it to bed.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:30 AM
Jun 2014

If the request for your son was recorded a BOLO alert may have been issued. You don't want your son being picked up, handcuffed and shoved into the back seat of a cop car. Things could really escalate. Best to go to the police station and get everything cleared up.

 

Michigander_Life

(549 posts)
8. Criminal offense of what?
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:24 AM
Jun 2014

At worst a traffic ticket could be issued at some point, but not likely given the unreliability of the witness. And that is assuming that the police in that jurisdiction have an offense which covers private property parking lots in which doing a donut is illegal -- in many states, the laws of the road don't extend to private property.

Further, it sounds like the main issue was a cop who doesn't know how to talk to people. Police are ambassadors more often than not. They should possess the skills and the desire to communicate effectively with people in as many situations as possible.

Harshly and repeatedly knocking and ringing a doorbell in this situation conveys emergency where none exists and is inappropriate.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
9. There is no statutory responsibility to
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:25 AM
Jun 2014

Report to a police station unless ordered to by a judge. This would be a good time to reinforce to the kid to never speak with the police without a lawyer. This can be scary, they may put him in a cell until the lawyer arrives, but they are trained experts at lying and twisting to justify charges. Never allow a search of car, person or home without a warrant and a lawyer.

 

sulphurdunn

(6,891 posts)
120. Yes, never talk to the cops
Mon Jun 23, 2014, 08:46 AM
Jun 2014

without a lawyer, except to ask if you are under arrest or free to go.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
4. Just fyi...
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:19 AM
Jun 2014

People should never go to a police interview without a lawyer unless they are a victim of a crime or a witness to a crime, and even then should do so with caution.

 

Michigander_Life

(549 posts)
12. What about someone who wants to take responsibility for their actions?
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:27 AM
Jun 2014

I agree with your message for those who don't want to take responsibility and have done something wrong, and certainly for those who haven't done anything wrong at all.

But for people who have done something illegal and want to take responsibility for their actions, more power too them.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
15. They still should do it with legal counsel. .
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:32 AM
Jun 2014

Taking responsibility for actions can result in community service or a 5 year prison sentence depending on how the police respond to an admission. It is stupid to trust the police, they are not on your side... ever...

Mariana

(14,849 posts)
74. Thank you, I've seen it. Good thing, too.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:21 PM
Jun 2014

I had a pair of DHS agents knock at my door once a few years ago, wanting to come in and "check out" our computers to "make sure" they weren't being used for a particular crime. They had no warrant. I said no and they went away. I read their ID's and got cards from them, and called the nearest Federal building to verify they were really DHS agents, and they were. I haven't heard from them again, so I assume they had zero evidence of anything and were on a fishing expedition.

I did open the door, but I stepped outside and closed the door behind me once I saw a badge. It freaked me right out at the time, I was shaking and stuttering and thoroughly intimidated by them - even retelling the story here, years later, has my adrenaline going.

Edited to add: The computers weren't, in fact, being used for the particular crime they were speaking of, or for any other crime.

blackspade

(10,056 posts)
69. Always go with legal council
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:58 AM
Jun 2014

Throwing yourself at the mercy of our corrupt criminal system invites disaster.

 

Aerows

(39,961 posts)
78. Never EVER
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:36 PM
Jun 2014

Speak to the police without having someone with you and a lawyer if it is in connection to anything remotely criminal.

You might as well ask to be put in jail.

MADem

(135,425 posts)
5. Sounds like a good LTTE to your local paper. Maybe even call up a news station.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:21 AM
Jun 2014

I'd send a letter to the mayor, the city manager, the selectman, the chief of police, I'd blog about it, and I wouldn't let up until I got some satisfaction.

Did you get a name from that police officer/bully? He needs to be named and shamed.

Maybe you need to go talk to the chief of police, with a lawyer in tow.

I'd be concerned about the fact that the cop just demanded that the kid 'turn himself in.' That's not how it works, but you never know how these idiots will misinterpret it if you don't get stuff out there and on record.

boston bean

(36,186 posts)
14. I was not in any frame of mind at the time to remember to get the officers name.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:28 AM
Jun 2014

If I go further, there will be a record of it, I hope.

I'm probably just going to try and not draw more attention to it officially. It's a bit scary because I really don't hold the power and it could negatively affect my son, who spends a lot of time in town and playing ball and visiting his friends. He's a good kid. But I do know that small town cops like to hassle young males. I don't want that to happen to him.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
18. Just make sure he knows what to do if he is questioned
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:35 AM
Jun 2014

Or arrested.. remaining silent is a right that should be practiced.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
31. kids tend to believe they can talk their way out of anything
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:05 AM
Jun 2014

They can't with police, and trying almost always is disastrous. I always told my boys that the only way they will be in trouble with me is if they talk to the police without a lawyer or give consent to search.

missingthebigdog

(1,233 posts)
21. You might want to rethink that.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:41 AM
Jun 2014

It is true that he has the power in this situation, but allowing him to abuse it only encourages him to escalate.

Apparently, your kid is already on his radar. If you don't complain about this guy's behavior now, you will not seem credible later if things do escalate.

This sounds like the kind of guy who is going to take it personally that you didn't do as you were told. Call a lawyer.

tblue37

(64,979 posts)
80. Yes--and maybe start a diary about it, for further documentation--
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:39 PM
Jun 2014

and take a pic of each page of the diary next to a copy of the day's newspaper, to prove that the entry was written when it was written.

MADem

(135,425 posts)
23. Find out what the laws are about recording in your state, and if One Party Consent is OK,
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:43 AM
Jun 2014

I'd advise you to get your son one of those suction cup things where you can stick your phone to it, and RECORD everything that is happening around you--like the Russians have, that they use as defense against people who play the "accident for insurance" game.



In this case, he might want to point the lens towards the police who are stopping him.

NutmegYankee

(16,177 posts)
73. LOL. The driver at the 6 minute mark opened a can of woop ass on the scammer
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:13 PM
Jun 2014

Some of these videos are just incredible. The brazen efforts to fake a pedestrian hit like the guy running up to the car and leaping onto the hood.

MADem

(135,425 posts)
86. Oh you know it! Those "Russian car video" compilations are hilarious--it's the kind of thing where
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:51 PM
Jun 2014

If you didn't see it, you wouldn't believe it could happen!!!

Tuesday Afternoon

(56,912 posts)
16. What happened really makes no sense to me as to why it
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:32 AM
Jun 2014

happened and how it came to happen.

Sheesh, it is a weird world.

madaboutharry

(40,151 posts)
46. To put on record her son's version of events and that
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:59 AM
Jun 2014

the visit from the police officer was improper.

I only suggest this because the officer told her that her son needed to go to the police station and this kind of bullshit could become an issue depending on what was written in the officer's report concerning the call. It just a suggestion.

former9thward

(31,802 posts)
50. The visit was not improper.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:03 AM
Jun 2014

The police have every right to come to your home if they have either seen something or received a complaint. If you don't want to talk to them then don't talk to them. A lawyer is not needed for her "son's version". This is about donuts in a parking lot for god's sake. It is not grand theft. The cops probably just wanted to yell at him and that would be it. Of course according to the OP her son is innocent as the day is long. If you believe that ....

damnedifIknow

(3,183 posts)
68. How about a cop visit out of the blue?
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:54 AM
Jun 2014

Happened to me using the old wrong address excuse. Came to my door and asked if I called the police and then started asking weird questions like "are you alone here"?

MADem

(135,425 posts)
88. The intimidation and the "You'd better tell your son with the driver's license..." routine was.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 01:03 PM
Jun 2014

They can come to someone's house, and if they aren't there, they can leave--not demand that people "give a message" (dire threat) to the supposed offender.


That lazyass cop didn't even go to the park and confront the kid, otherwise he would have found the kid right there. He came banging on the door to bully the mom because some idiot at dispatch fed him the address based on the license plate. Talk about pisspoor policing.

And relying on Mom (who might not be "mom"--that could have been addled Aunt Bertha who answered the door) to "relay a message" is bullshit.

Since when is that an appropriate way of charging someone with anything?

I'd get a home security system with good audio if the cops were like that in my town. Who needs that small-town thug BS?

It took police FOREVER to get past the "pig" designation of the sixties. It seems to me, that thanks to the Bush regime and all of this bully-overreach, that those days are starting to come back again. I can't say I care for it much. There's nothing wrong with being polite--beating down the door like the crime of the century is about to happen is NOT the way to win friends or influence people.

former9thward

(31,802 posts)
94. No one got charged.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 02:52 PM
Jun 2014

You made about a dozen assumptions that are not warranted. But if you want to go to war with the police department over doing donuts in the parking lot -- which of course her innocent as the driven snow son did not do -- then go ahead.

boston bean

(36,186 posts)
104. You know something, this is the second time that I've seen in this thread
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 06:54 PM
Jun 2014

where you try to smear me as someone who would only be out to protect my son and not offer the truth and that my son lies to me.

You don't know me from shit in shinola. Let me tell you something. When the cop told me that I believed HIM. I believed my son was acting like an idiot even though he had never had any trouble. I did donuts in cars when I was younger. It was not out of the realm of possibilities.

When I went and found him and saw that he was in fact where he said he was going and the alleged offense had taken place and he had not left, and that the parking lot is dirt, and there was no evidence of him doing donuts nor was his car or tires covered with dust, I fucking believed him. And because he was there and the cop said he had left, means the cop didn't witness it and some "concerned" citizen called because my son had turned his car around in a circle to park. I don't know why the citizen called. I don't give a shit. What makes you believe them over me?

Ignore the facts of how this circumstance of "such importance" meant police coming to my house performing incessant, urgent ringing of my front door bell, and pounding on my door, scaring the shit out of me, was not necessary.

Now continue on with your smearing.... if it makes you happy.

former9thward

(31,802 posts)
110. You know I really hope you take the various posters' advice.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 07:11 PM
Jun 2014

Hire a criminal defense attorney, like they say, and let him/her handle it. He/she will chuckle behind your back but they need to feed their kids too.

 

alphafemale

(18,497 posts)
66. Because nobody in their right mind trusts fucking cops anymore.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:45 AM
Jun 2014

People who do, end up in prison on what ever invented charges the cops think they can make stick.

If they are not so lucky they may wind up maimed.

They may wind up dead.

Maybe the cop will burst down their door at the wrong address and shoot their dog dead when the dog barks.

No one in their right mind trusts the cops anymore because those militarized, roid-raging freaks long ago ceased in their duty to protect and serve.

 

Savannahmann

(3,891 posts)
19. Like another poster, I don't think this story is over yet.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:35 AM
Jun 2014

I hope you got pictures and video of the parking lot to show that there were no black marks. I say that because you have a difficult job, you have to prove a negative, which is nearly impossible. The best way you can do that is to show that the evidence does not support the story you were told.

Since your son did not turn up at the Police Department as you had arranged, the Police are likely to be coming for him any time. Or they may have an alert in their computer system if he comes to their attention anytime soon. Wanted for questioning for Reckless driving. The officer who stopped him for a rolling stop at the red light would arrest your son and take him to the station for reckless driving. You have only your word without any evidence, that your son was not doing donuts and there were no marks on the pavement, your son is a habitual offender of traffic laws.

First, get pictures and video, use todays paper to date them, and walk the parking lot. Then call an attorney, tell them what is up, lawyers can smooth over problems a lot easier than a concerned mother can, and a lot more effectively.

Finally, never assume things with cops are over just because it appears that way. The officer pounding on your door had enough free time to follow up on a reported car doing donuts, which means there is a witness who got the license number. Your Son may have an enemy who is trying to set him up for a SWATTING. Those are possible only because of the police's tendency to overreact to any situation where there might be the slightest danger that they may get so much as a stubbed toe.

I wish you luck, but I am very concerned that this will get worse before it gets better.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
28. Not exactly
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:00 AM
Jun 2014

The police/prosecution have to prove you did something beyond a reasonable doubt...very difficult to do without a police officer seeing it, a video, an admission or multiple witnesses. One shouldn't make any statements because they can and will be used against you.

 

Savannahmann

(3,891 posts)
34. I've seen several cases where one police officer trumped many other witnesses.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:18 AM
Jun 2014

Traffic Court is one place where this happens regularly. Besides, proving that you "did it" is something that the police will worry about later, after they arrest you and lock you up.

The way things are supposed to be, is the way I wish they were. Now, in far too many instances, the police are judge, jury, and executioner over what seems to be minor offenses.

Look at the flood of police shootings. Three hundred rounds fired at a car where the occupents were trapped, unable to escape, and unarmed. The police fired more than $100 worth of pistol ammo at the car. To achieve that kind of expenditure of ammo, several officers had to reload their pistols, and then continue firing. To this day, I wonder if they stopped shooting because someone realized that the suspects had to be dead, or if they ran out of bullets.

The police were not required to prove beyond any doubt level that they were justified in their use of force. No one was charged with a crime, not even reckless endangerment. A handful were given time off with pay. So fire enough ammunition for a small war, and get a paid vacation.

I believe this situation can place Boston Bean's son in extreme risk. The being taken to jail is one of those possible outcomes, the risk of police over-reacting and using excessive force is always present. Bean should take care, seek advice from an attorney, and move quickly to head this off at the proverbial legal pass. Wait and see means you have to round up proof you didn't do it, because sure enough some Cop will swear he saw it despite being miles away. The groups of people I mistrust the most is anyone with a badge and gun.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
48. Going to jail to await charges is the tool police use to get people
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:00 AM
Jun 2014

Waive their right to remain silent. The catch is the person still ends up in jail and the police have a statement to twist. Hundreds of thousands of people are arrested every day. The ones who talk are far more likely to get convicted.

I have worked with many criminal defense attorneys, every one will advise remaining silent every time.

Traffic court or municipal court serve more as a preliminary hearing and plea hearing. A conviction in these courts are often overturned on appeal to the district court, or the next higher court depending on the jurisdiction.

People do the wrong thing every day based on a local understanding of the system or assumptions. Get a criminal defense lawyer in the jurisdiction you are charged. Not the family estate lawyer, tax lawyer, divorce lawyer, injury lawyer...a criminal defense lawyer.

oh, and the horror stories you speak of do happen. ...statistically very, very seldom.

 

Savannahmann

(3,891 posts)
63. I couldn't agree more, with one exception.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:35 AM
Jun 2014

My attorney is a wide spectrum attorney. He is in court every week on criminal defense, but he doesn't focus on that. He does have a good record, and a good reputation. I've used him to straighten out a few legal issues, always to my advantage.

The problem with those horror stories being statically seldom, that is I think a hopeful statement. I was in municipal court one time, and was one of the last called for my case. A dispute with a neighbor that was blown out of proportion. One officer was there testifying to people driving under the influence of marijuana. When he reached the probable cause to suspect it, he always reacted the same. He rolled his eyes up and looked at the ceiling, then he recited the symptoms of marijuana use. The entire list every single time.

So every single one of those accused had every single one of the symptoms. Not one of them was missing one of the symptoms or signs. The probability of that is so astronomical as to make the lottery look good by comparison. Statistically speaking, I am more likely to be killed in an auto accident than gunfire. Yet, I believe that any deaths by gunfire are preventable and we should have already taken action to prevent all we can. Statistically, only a fraction of those military styled weapons will be used in violence. Yet I still believe we should ban them from everyone because when they do happen, the results are catastrophic.

The crew of Apollo 11 were put into isolation upon their return. The statistical probability of them bringing back some sort of space virus or bacterial infection was exceedingly low. Yet the results of that if it should happen, would be catastrophic to say the least.

Police lie every day. In the 1980's, I worked as a security guard. I went to class to get my certificate and permit for a night stick which we were informed was called a baton. During the class I attended, a police officer told us to claim that anyone we beat was a child molester to the crowd that had seen the incident. He said this would put us on the good side of the crowd, and even if that charge was never brought, the witness would say that the nice security guard was trying to get that mean criminal into custody.

Now, if a police officer is telling the rent a cops to lie, to create an editorial slant on the reporting of the events, what are they doing every day in their reports? Rent a cops who were in a one day class that lasted for all of eight hours. So he didn't know any of us. We weren't friends, we weren't co-workers. We were in effect strangers, who were advised to lie to the witnesses to get the editorial slant we wanted. One of the reasons I decided that I didn't want to be a cop despite my childish fascination with the idea.

Take a day, sit in the municipal court, and listen to the police report the events to the Judge. Every time the same story is told. Every time the same words, the same behavior. That is practiced, and it is obviously a lie. I say it's obviously a lie because again, the laws of probability. I have seen nothing to suggest that this pattern of behavior, this technique of telling little lies to get the editorial slant they desire has changed.

Better yet. Tell me what cops were punished for false reporting of an incident when a cop is found to have lied? He did not do so in a vacuum. There were other cops there, and all their reports read about the same, but the cop who brutalized the subject is punished, his co-workers, fellow officers, are not punished despite the fact that they covered up for his brutality.

I wish that those horror stories never happened. But they happen to some extent every single day, in every single city. Cops lie, use excessive force, and abuse people. Not rarely as we'd like to believe, but all the time.

Here's an example. http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/suburbs/ct-lake-county-sheriff-suspension-met-20140619,0,7812473.story

A Lake County sheriff's lieutenant under fire for insubordination and misuse of county electronic devices will keep his job despite his boss's attempt to fire him — but will be demoted under a disciplinary ruling issued by a quasi-judicial commission Wednesday.

snip

Morrison alleged in prior testimony during the dayslong hearing that the sheriff was seeking his firing for political reasons and had overlooked worse offenses by other employees.


In other words, everybody is doing it, and they singled me out because they didn't like me.

Depress yourself, read this site every week or so. When you consider what a small percentage of the population the Police make, they do seem to have a large number of complaints.

NutmegYankee

(16,177 posts)
40. That only matters in a court.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:37 AM
Jun 2014

The police just need probable cause to arrest you. And they love to mess with people. Nothing is stopping them from arresting the son and later not pressing charges.

 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
52. True, fear of arrest isn't a good reason to act with haste
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:04 AM
Jun 2014

And the court conviction is the only thing one should be concerned with.

NightWatcher

(39,343 posts)
24. I'm guessing you're white.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:44 AM
Jun 2014

First, if you are black, the police don't aggressively ring the doorbell. They kick the door in more times than not.

Second, they don't invite young black males to come to the police station when they get around to it. They usually insist and drag them there.

Also had he been black, several cops would have been dispatched to the parking lot where he was doing doughnuts and had he not obeyed their demands, things might not have turned out well. (See the http://www.democraticunderground.com/10025133662 )

I'm glad things worked out for you and your kid

 

Caretha

(2,737 posts)
25. Something isn't quite adding up
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:48 AM
Jun 2014

How did the police officer get your address? Why did the police officer not talk to your son, who was still at the ball park and feet away from the "alleged" incident?

Personally, I'd be calling the police chief and complaining loudly about the officer obnoxiously banging on my door & point out to him the above. I'd also ask the Police Chief why and upon what legal grounds do they have the right to ask your son to come to the police station. At the same time pointedly asking if you needed to hire and attorney to protect your son's civil rights and get to the bottom of the problem with either A) poorly trained police officer or B) poorly run police department or C) both.
 

pipoman

(16,038 posts)
27. I once had a boss who was lead law enforcement officer for the state attorney general
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:54 AM
Jun 2014

He preached never talking to the police, and certainly never telling them what you are going to do. He said they will do what they will do and you should do and not say what you are going to do.

 

Caretha

(2,737 posts)
103. Really?
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 06:54 PM
Jun 2014

Which law would cover that? I've never heard of it. I'm not talking about evacuating for emergencies of any kind.

Please tell

Mariana

(14,849 posts)
114. You understand the key word is ASK, right?
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 08:10 PM
Jun 2014

Not tell, not order, not demand, not require, but ASK. The police have the right to ASK you to go anywhere, anytime. So does everyone else. You have the right to refuse to go where they ASK you to go. If you can't say no, then they aren't ASKING, are they?

 

msanthrope

(37,549 posts)
26. Get an attorney for your son. This might not be over. That's first. Second,
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 09:49 AM
Jun 2014

never, ever open your door to the police. Talk to them through the screen or through the door.


Third....instruct your son that if he is pulled over, he is to decline making a statement, he is to deny permission to search, and he is to ask to contact his attorney.

 

Savannahmann

(3,891 posts)
35. I find myself in the unusal position of agreeing with you
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:20 AM
Jun 2014

Considering how many times we've disagreed on numerous other issues, I find this a welcome change.

former9thward

(31,802 posts)
43. No need for an attorney.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:41 AM
Jun 2014

For donuts in a parking lot? I know the legal profession is going through tough times but an attorney is not needed. I agree with the rest of your advice.

 

Savannahmann

(3,891 posts)
55. I disagree, and I am not an attorney
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:09 AM
Jun 2014

The arrangement Boston Bean made was for the Son to report to the police station. He did not, she did not insist because she believed that he had not done the accused action. In a perfect world, that would be enough. However, it depends on how bored and or vindictive the police are in her town. If they are busy, the son will slip through the cracks and the incident will be forgotten. If not, then one of the police may follow up on it, or enter it into the system.

The Police arriving at three in the morning in full riot gear to assault the house is not probable, but it is not ruled out in the modern world.

The best way to deal with this is to contact an Attorney. Donuts in the parking lot if convicted would be at best exhibition of speed, or the equivalent in her local legal code. Reckless driving is another probable charge. The increase in insurance if he is convicted, would be ten times what it would cost to talk to a lawyer. In other words, far cheaper to get it handled now, than deal with it later.

I say this as a man who was charged with an accident for stopping and assisting someone. I was handy, and the cop decided I was really involved despite my and my girlfriends assurances that I was not. Somebody had to pay, and it was my insurance company that did, with the requisite increase in rates to go along with the payment.

Just because you didn't do anything doesn't mean that the record will reflect this truth. My rules now are lawyer up and then fight like hell. I've got one on speed dial now, and have a dashboard camera mounted on my rear view mirror to make sure there is a record of my behavior and actions. That way the Lawyer has a video to work with should I find myself in court. Instead of it being my word against the cop, it's the cop against the video and my word.

former9thward

(31,802 posts)
60. I am a lawyer and always encourage people to stay away from our legal system.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:24 AM
Jun 2014

As far as you can. Lawyers tend to ensnare you in it. From what I got from the OP a police officer did not witness whatever events took place. That being the case he can't be convicted of any vehicle charges. A third party witness, if one exists, won't do it and a prosecutor would not bring charges with out police testimony.

former9thward

(31,802 posts)
79. Your links are interactions with the police.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:38 PM
Jun 2014

In the OP the police were not present at whatever events took place. If someone wants to waste money on lawyers because of some imagined chain of events more power to them. Lawyers have mortgages to pay too but I don't think it is necessary.

 

msanthrope

(37,549 posts)
77. Let me guess....not a criminal defense attorney? Because I am. And I still
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:36 PM
Jun 2014

think the kid should talk to an attorney.

former9thward

(31,802 posts)
84. The only thing I have ever done is prosecution and defense.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:46 PM
Jun 2014

Haven't spent a minute doing anything else. Spinning donuts is spinning donuts. A grand jury will not be impaneled.

dem in texas

(2,672 posts)
93. this is getting blown out of proportion
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 01:55 PM
Jun 2014

Even if he did a few donuts, so what? Have hubby call the cops and explain that you have cautioned your son to drive more carefully. Tell son to drive more carefully that people are watching him. I had this same, my grandson and friends were ridding bikes and using a man's horseshoe driveway to turn around. One of the kids hit the mail box, did not damage it, but man called cops, they showed up at my house. I apologized to cop then told grandson to stay away from that's man's house. Good lesson for the kids, problem solved. Save your energy for the really big things that happen, but show your kid that there is a way to solve a small problem without getting into some conflict. Getting a lawyer for this, ridiculous!

LeftFieldMom

(13 posts)
118. Friend of Foe
Mon Jun 23, 2014, 12:41 AM
Jun 2014

They're not you're enemy either...

painting strokes of good and bad...they are not mutually exclusive. This all or nothing culture is bat shit crazy.

Let's focus on those that abuse laws and get them out and praise those that serve and protect...

 

MannyGoldstein

(34,589 posts)
30. That sucks.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:02 AM
Jun 2014

Boston area?

My experience with Boston-area cops has been exemplary, but I'm sure not everyone's is.

If you know any criminal defense lawyers or other lawyers experienced with cops, they might want to check with the cops to see what's up.

2naSalit

(86,054 posts)
37. Sounds to me...
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:29 AM
Jun 2014

after hearing your son's explanation, as though *someone* didn't like your son for some other reason and wanted to cause problems for him... maybe someone who lost the game on the ball field, or for any other reason and made up the story to cause problems. You know, the false accusation thing.

Get representation and go to the station and demand to have the complainer questioned as well as all of the above suggestions.

DawgHouse

(4,019 posts)
41. You've had some good advice here
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:37 AM
Jun 2014

and I just wanted to that I'm glad there was no harm to your husband or son. I would have probably passed out from anxiety if the police came banging on my door like that! Good luck to you.

 

Rhinodawg

(2,219 posts)
42. Someone decided to ANONAMOUSLY call the police.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:39 AM
Jun 2014

Any idiot can drop a dime, give the license plate number and cause trouble.

Get a lawyer..... today.





btw, you do your own dishes??
lol

 

snooper2

(30,151 posts)
53. what kind of car does he have? rear wheel drive?
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:07 AM
Jun 2014

If he WAS doing donuts and it's front wheel drive give him some mad props that takes a little skill!


unless it was in reverse, that is cheating LOL

boston bean

(36,186 posts)
58. I bet he wishes he had a car like that!
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:15 AM
Jun 2014

how does one lock the front wheels and not the back?

I'm an idiot when it comes to this stuff.

azureblue

(2,131 posts)
62. Yes, but
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:28 AM
Jun 2014

AWD donuts look way different from RWD donuts. That is, if the car has enough horsepower to spin all 4 wheels in a circle.

 

Tireman

(40 posts)
115. I wondered if anyone would pick up on that fact...
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:08 PM
Jun 2014

I wonder if the OP will change her way of thinking about all sorts of false accusations because of this personal experience...

azureblue

(2,131 posts)
61. If you are concerned aboutyour kid getting stopped
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:26 AM
Jun 2014

Set up his cell phone to record with just a voice prompt, and to automatically upload the audio to a cloud.

Get a dashcam that will continue to record when the ignition is off, and will automatically upload to a cloud.


If your kid obeys the speed limits and you suspect the local cops will try to pull him over and claim speeding. teach him to say this:

Cop: "I pulled you over for speeding. Do you know how fast you were going?"

Kid: "My speedometer read "xx mph, but since I have GPS enabled on my phone that records and uploads my location and speed, I can download that on my home computer, print it out, and pretty much tell you to the nearest mph."

This will stop a cop who is planning on using "I observed him going xx over the speed limits" right in his tracks, and is good enough to make the cop believe that his claimed radar could be contested in court.

 

packman

(16,296 posts)
67. Agree with the lawyer advice BUT
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 11:49 AM
Jun 2014

then if you take a lawyer with you, there's the cost. Not going to equate it with a fine, or a ticket cost,but nevertheless you will be shelling out money for something you were dragged into as an innocent. Seems like a can't win situation insofar as reaching into your pocket is concerned just because some local citizen complained about some dust being kicked up.

Lint Head

(15,064 posts)
70. Proof is needed. If their are witnesses pointing fingers then those witnesses need to come forward.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:02 PM
Jun 2014

I doubt they will or would. I've had dangerous situations where young folks drive dangerously in front of my home and I do take out my phone to video license plates and the incident. I do this because there have been several bad accidents on the curve we live on endangering children. Anyone can just "accuse" a person of something for revenge or any reason but there still needs to be proof and usually more than one witness that is willing to testify. People who just throw out accusations are usually cowardly because it is cowardly to accuse someone to get revenge or "one up" another person. If there is no warrant or summons your child is not compelled to go to a police station. That self incrimination.

MrScorpio

(73,626 posts)
71. Good, you didn't take him to the station
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:04 PM
Jun 2014

Never trust the police and avoid talking to them whenever possible.

ucrdem

(15,512 posts)
76. Good advice.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:29 PM
Jun 2014

Horrible experience, been there, but it sounds like maybe they were trying to send an unofficial message, and having delivered it, they don't really expect you to follow up on it. That sucks but I'd have as little interaction as necessary, and if it's necessary they'll send a summons. And if it is, maybe some advice from an attorney before following up, if you can find one, but whatever you do don't antagonize the cops if you can help it. Yeah it's unfair but why make trouble for yourself? I learned the hard way never to pass a cop on the road and I haven't gotten a speeding ticket in a while.

 

jtuck004

(15,882 posts)
72. These are cops. They heard he was making donuts. And they want him to report to the police station.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:13 PM
Jun 2014

Somehow this all fits together...

R B Garr

(16,920 posts)
75. It sounds like someone living by the park is reporting these incidents
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:24 PM
Jun 2014

and the police are relying on their information. I'm only saying that because your son was right at the park where the police could have found him, but it sounded like they were repeating information that was told to them and relying on it. They probably ran the plates then to get the name, or the caller knows the people at the park already and just repeated the names to the police who then took action based on that alone.

Without acting suspiciously, is there any way you can determine who might be calling the police? I don't know how big your neighborhood is and if that would be even possible. This would only be for your info since you can't really prove it, but it can give you an idea of their motives for watching who comes and goes from the park and why they would be calling the police.

So that's pretty much the tactic I would take. Ask the police if they saw it for themselves (if this happens again), and ask where they are getting their information because what they have told you before about his behavior is not credible. It actually sounds like someone nearby is riled up about something that happened that they are blaming on the random people meeting at the park. Maybe someone stole something or damaged their property and they are now hyper-vigilant about everyone. If they cops didn't see it, they are relying on someone's input.

I agree that it is very worrisome to deal with the police in that manner! To them it's just their job, but if you have very limited contact with law enforcement, it is traumatic what they did. They should realize they are upsetting people (considered harassment?) to come to the door like that, even if what they are describing was accurate -- which it sounds like it wasn't.

mainstreetonce

(4,178 posts)
81. False accusations
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:42 PM
Jun 2014

I once had a similar experience. A neighbor came to my door. This woman was an ordained minister of a local church. She accused the boy who just picked up my 16yr old son of all kinds of dangerous traffic violations. She said she had been watching "that black car" for months as it sped down the street endangering children.


I told her the boy who picked up my son got his license today. He borrowed the car from his brother. "That black car" has never been down this street before.

Then as she walked away,I started screaming at her. What if there had been an accident? Who would the police believe? The kid who got his license today or the Minister who swears she has been watching him for months?

Witnesses lie,even witnesses who have religious credibility.

Squinch

(50,773 posts)
82. You must have been terrified.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 12:43 PM
Jun 2014

Good luck with this. People who know more than I are giving you advice, so I won't try to add, but let us know how this works out for you.

 

awoke_in_2003

(34,582 posts)
89. when dealing with cops always remember
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 01:10 PM
Jun 2014

you are guilty until proven innocent. Yes, this is not what we have been taught, but it is the paranoid world they live in.

rosesaylavee

(12,126 posts)
92. You could live in our town
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 01:27 PM
Jun 2014

We live in a small town in the Chicago metro area. When our son was 13, he and three other buddies were shooting the breeze behind a box store, across from the delivery lane, up an embankment with a chain link fence between them and the top of the embankment. There were pine trees there, probably cool and secluded so they could smoke cigarettes or talk about girls, etc. They were tossing pine cones over the fence as they talked. One hit a pizza delivery guy's car on his windshield. He reported it to the police saying some bad youths were flinging pine cones at his vehicle and broke his windshield. The police came by, the kids freaked and broke up to go home by separate routes - my son was picked up and taken down to the police station for questioning, as were the other youths. Questioned separately, their stories were the same. However, the police chief, in order for the pizza delivery guy not to press 'charges' and take them to court, had agreed that each of the boys families could pitch in to buy him a replacement windshield. It was a lot of money for us at the time as we are not well off by any means. But no doubt, the others coughing up $300 was not a big deal.

We trusted our son, who was not a liar and would have confessed to throwing stones given the severity of the situation. His and his friends complete shock at what had happened was convincing in and of itself. We called our alderman friend who said just pay up, it wasn't worth being on his record when he applied to colleges and scholarships. Our brother in law, an engineer and funny guy, calculated the velocity a pine cone would need to be thrown in order to crack a windshield and said that the kid that threw the pine cone had a promising pitching career ahead of him and the Red Sox should know his name.

We paid. And it was a valuable lesson for my family. Do not trust the cops. Do not expect justice at their hands. And btw, not sure if this matters, but we are white and this is a majority white suburb. Truth is, cops hate teenage boys no matter their skin color.

Ironically, we found out later, the 7-Eleven was being robbed at gun point, a rarity here, at the very same time the two cop cars on duty were rustling up the youths for pitching pine cones. They were late to the scene and missed the robbers.

laundry_queen

(8,646 posts)
96. I've had that feeling before
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 03:03 PM
Jun 2014

Cops came to my door 3.5 hours after my ex took my kids on a long trip and the kids hadn't texted me on their first stop like they were supposed to and weren't responding to my texts. So when I saw the police at the door I thought I was going to faint and vomit at the same time. But my kids were fine, the cops just came to the door to ask me if I noticed anything the previous night because someone had their quad stolen. Whew! Talk about bad timing!

Sometimes in small towns people call in to cops and are mistaken or sometimes cops make shit up because they are bored. When I was 20, the police said that someone called and told them we were having a huge party outside and that there was underage drinking. So a whole bunch of police showed up at my front door - yes I was having friends over, but there were 6 of us. Yes we were drinking but we were all of legal age (18 here). We weren't outside we were in the basement rec room watching a movie. But the neighbour told the cops we were having this huge party. My mom answered the door and the police asked her to go get the home owner, LOL. She was like, "Um, that would be me." They said they had a complaint about a party from a neighbour. My mom asked which one, because she knew all her neighbours and she knew none of them would call in to complain about a party at her house, because she knew them. They said they couldn't say who called and asked if they could come in. My mom refused. She reiterated, "I'm the home owner and I'm telling you there is no party, just a few people quietly watching a movie, and no one here is underage, so there's no reason for you to come in." The cops were like, "okay, thanks for your time, good-bye" and that was it. My mom was PISSED though. She went on a rant of "how dare they? just because someone calls in they can harass you and try to come in? WTF?" Then the next day she asked all of our neighbours if they knew anything and of course no one did. I'm sure no one would say even if they did but considering our next door neighbours often had actual parties and the cops hadn't come to those, we doubt anyone did actually call. The only thing we could think of is earlier in the evening we had a wiener roast on the backyard firepit...but that was like at 5pm. We were all inside by 8. And we weren't loud. It was the most bizarre thing. We were so caught off guard that my mom had the same thought about the cops being there because someone was hurt (my dad and brother were on a trip).

Anyway, I agree that if you do go, get a lawyer. But it sounds to me as if they were just bored...but you can't be too sure. We are lucky that we don't have small town sheriff departments here...I'm in Canada so it's all RCMP (they have their own issues, but at least you don't have the small town corruption of a town run by the same sheriff for decades). I wouldn't take my chances if I were you. Good luck.

 

LittleBlue

(10,362 posts)
98. I know police have been in the news lately, but nothing really happened here
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 03:32 PM
Jun 2014

They came to your house, knocked, didn't hear anyone, so they knocked louder. Then they informed you that they wanted to talk to your son, presumably because a complaint had been made. Someone else was a nosy type and copied down his license number, which probably had your address associated with it.

I don't see how the police did anything wrong. If you decided to write a complaint to the department or your paper, what would you say? He knocked too loudly? He frightened me with his presence? No one will take this seriously outside DU. The fact that they didn't follow up tells you that they don't care much.

And don't waste money hiring an attorney. The accusation is donuts in a parking lot, and it seems the police have lost interest anyway.

LisaL

(44,962 posts)
100. I agree.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 05:30 PM
Jun 2014

Reading some of these responses, one would think a sky was falling.
Somebody must have called in the son for doing donuts (whether he did it or not).
Big deal.

boston bean

(36,186 posts)
102. Can you let me know how you know what happened at my house?
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 06:42 PM
Jun 2014

Anticipating learning how, as I would like to have those powers as well.

 

LittleBlue

(10,362 posts)
108. Uh... paragraphs 4-7?
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 07:07 PM
Jun 2014

I don't need special powers to read what you wrote in your OP.


I just edited out the statements about your feelings because you seem to have overreacted.

 

B Calm

(28,762 posts)
112. I wish the cops would catch the little hoodlums doing doughnuts in the middle
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 07:21 PM
Jun 2014

of the night at Green Valley State Fish and Wildlife Area NW of Terre Haute, Indiana!

Lex

(34,108 posts)
116. If the cops really want to talk to him, they'll come back by the house and ask for him again.
Sun Jun 22, 2014, 10:16 PM
Jun 2014

If not, I wouldn't worry about it. Your son is under no legal obligation to go to the police station or talk to the police.



Jefferson23

(30,099 posts)
122. Wow, boston bean, your story was written very well to describe the anxiety unprofessional
Mon Jun 23, 2014, 09:01 AM
Jun 2014

police officers can inflict. They are suppose to check out what is reported to them and do
so before presuming anything. I am glad for you and your son, it seems it is behind you now.

By any chance did you take video via your phone of the parking lot? Will the police
keep this complaint as any part of a record on your son?

Very concerning, so sorry you had to go through that.

 

MillennialDem

(2,367 posts)
123. Have had the cops called on me for "driving like a drunk" a couple times in one small crappy town I
Mon Jun 23, 2014, 09:11 AM
Jun 2014

used to live next to. It was largely because the car I had at the time was a POS. Heard other complaints from other people who lived or work in or near that town if they had a POS car too. In fact heard the same story at the grocery store in town from the cashier AND one of the customers talking about the same thing happening to both of them.

They called me once on the phone and another time a cop was waiting outside my car in a parking lot and started questioning me once I got in.

Just ignore them and if it happens to you or your son again the correct response is to act like the concerned citizen who called you in a nut. I wasn't doing donuts/speeding/driving like a jerk/weaving/running red lights/etc officer. I have no idea what this is about.

Another story I have to is when I had a car with broken exhaust everyone thought I was going faster than I really was. I got "the invisible basketball" in a residential zone with a 25 mph speed limit. I was doing 17....

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