Republican Candidate Is A Serial Public Masturbator, For Freedom And Stuff
Jordan D. Haskins, A candidate for Michigan Legislature, can totally explain his multiple felony convictions for breaking into government vehicles, disconnecting the spark plugs, and masturbating while the motor was sparking and making noises, because of course. Haskins cannot own a firearm and for the majority of his adult life, he could neither vote nor serve on a jury. But even spending time in prison systems in two states and his current status as a parolee has not deterred the 24-year-old Saginaw man from running for political office.
Seriously, we’ve seen Congress. He would fit right in.
http://freakoutnation.com/2014/06/27/republican-candidate-is-a-serial-public-masturbator-for-freedom-and-stuff/
= new reply since forum marked as read
... Issa admirer or wannabe (re: breaking into cars etc.) 
Haskins, a Republican candidate, said.
I believe his "dreams" (aka fantasies) are part of what led to his convictions 
