I used to tie my necktie while driving down MoPac at 70 mph using only my knees to steer at 6:45 in the morning. I'm still waiting for an award.

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Of course, I would NEVER text and drive. THAT'S dangerous!!!
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(Seriously -- take it from a long-time motorcyclist.)
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Officer: Sir, I stopped you because you were swerving back there.
MFM: Yeah, I know. I sorry. Hang on a sec, gotta finish something.
Officer: Holy shit! What the fuck are you doing?!
MFM: OK, I'm good now. You need to see my license and registration?
Officer: What? No. NO! I don't wanna have to touch it now. Go. Move. Get going!
MFM: OK, have a great day.

I was on a NYC bus and thought I smelled nail polish. I did - a woman was doing her nails on a moving bus.

underneath all the makeup!

played by Delta Burke. Suzanne was notorious for her vanity, and was often seen putting on makeup at stoplights.

Wait till you see---naw can't outdo MFMs post.

I couldn't see her face, but her driving still looked pretty good. Something had to suffer.

I shit you not.

Seinfeld had many many moments of absolute brilliance.

If the ending of season 8 of Curb was the finale - that was a brilliant way for Larry to go out.

When I was younger, in college...
I ate chinese noodle soup, with chopsticks, while driving stick shift.

I don't do that any more.
Nowadays, I drive automatic.

Yep, heavy traffic.

On East bound I-70 in STL, morning rush hour, INTO the rising sun. Driver's arm out the window with a butter knife, SCRAPING frost off the windshield. At 70 MPH!

Luckily I was west bound at the time,,,,

I know someone who had to learn to walk and talk all over again because of someone else who was fiddling with their tape deck and ran a stop sign. I don't even talk on the phone and drive, and people get angry at me for it.

GASP! The horrors of it all. How inconsiderate to be holding someone back who would otherwise be able to fly through ant any high speed playing backpack pinball on their way to whatever trivial task they have to run. I'm yet to find a school building without at least three alternate routes to avoid going through the flashers, but the GPS isn't going to gvie them those routes. Just simply knowing the bus route times avoids a lot of slow-downs plan around them.

I know I would hate the young driver I was if he came down my street today, but after having kids of my own, things changed a little (a lot) and I have a good sense for the safe speed, even if it isn't the limit. Sometimes "too slow" can actually be an unsafe hazard. We avoid the cell phone at all costs unless we know there's an emergency update coming in at any time. Then we find a safe place to pull over to talk. If there's another occupant, hand the phone to them.

Simple things can handle all of these problems. And as for makeup, just getting up 5 minutes earlier and not getting sucked into the morning talk shows solves that one.

I say "friend" because, at least while a heroin addict, he wasn't really anyone's friend

on the Baltimore Beltway decades ago. Single mom two children working 70 hours a week.
Left the house with wet hair, and blow dried my hair using the heat set to blow towards my hair.
Put on my makeup behind the wheel, brushed my hair.

I couldn't do it today. Age has taken away some of my multi-tasking abilities.
But I also don't have the time pressure like I did back then.

its the law !!!