But its agility only served it for so long.

It's now singing songs of valiant battle, in the afterlife with his predecessors.

I consider it a mercy killing.

as WC Fields once said of a fly he smacked.

Preferred weapons of combat were.............?

I forged it swiftly upon observing the buzzing pest.

Its demise was swift and skillful in form and function.

May his dispatch serve as a warning to others.

Within the pages of Ripley’s Wonder Book of Strange Facts (1957), a repository of the curious but true, a tale is told of the lavish funeral the poet Virgil (70 BCE–19 BCE) staged for his pet housefly. Held in the grounds of Virgil’s home on Rome’s Esquiline Hill, the funeral attracted the great and good of the city. Dirges were sung and tributes read. Virgil’s patron, Maecenas, delivered a lengthy and moving eulogy to the departed insect, and Virgil was himself said to have uttered a few of his exquisite verses over the tiny carcass.

A tomb had been erected, and the lifeless body of the fly was placed within it to the wails and moans of the professional mourners.
So lavish were the commemorations that the cost was estimated at over eight hundred thousand sesterces.

But the reason for the funeral was not due to extravagance, eccentricity, nor even emotion.

Having defeated Julius Caesar’s assassins at the battle of Philippi, the Second Triumvirate was at that very moment engaged in confiscating the estates of the rich and dividing them among the war veterans returning from the battlefield.
Only one exception was given: if the estate held a burial plot, it was not to be touched.

By burying his housefly, Virgil saved his house.



http://cabinetmagazine.org/issues/25/pendle.php

I will keep it in mind in the eventuality of more combat against the scions Musca domestica.

My skill at dispatching their ilk is unmatched.

I am confident that I will prevail.

I yearn to hear the lamentations of their mournful companions.

You shall pay for your transgressions.

I do not cower away from a challenge.

Under the appropriate rules of combat, it was trial to the death.

Two entered the arena, one was left standing.

They fly themselves to death. No mess to wipe up and no embarrassing misses.

sometime this week.