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47of74

(18,470 posts)
Thu Aug 18, 2016, 09:14 AM Aug 2016

Nebraska man tries the mixing his protein shake defense

This guy was seen pleasuring himself in his car by two women at a gas station. He had an interesting excuse that he tried to use when confronted by cops;

A Nebraska man who was twice spotted masturbating in his car told cops that he was not pleasuring himself, but rather vigorously "mixing his protein shake" when spotted by the female victims, records show.

Nathan Grimes, 21, is facing two indecent exposure charges in connection with the incidents in Lincoln.

Armed with the license plate number of the Mazda (and a description of the suspect), Lincoln cops confronted Grimes at his residence.

While Grimes, seen above, copped to being at the convenience store Monday, he claimed that the witness had mistaken his hand movements for masturbation. In fact, Grimes explained, he had actually been mixing a protein shake.


Mixing the protein shake....that's a new one.

UPDATE: Mixing a protein shake has now been immortalized on Urban Dictionary
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Nebraska man tries the mixing his protein shake defense (Original Post) 47of74 Aug 2016 OP
Sperm is protien liberal N proud Aug 2016 #1
Shaken, not stirred. 47of74 Aug 2016 #2
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