Democratic Underground - The Top 10 Conservative Idiots, No. 382

The Top 10 Conservative Idiots, No. 382

October 4, 2010
Meg Witless Edition

This week Meg Whitman (1), Carl Paladino (2), and Paul LePage (3) all do their best to blow up their own campaigns. Elsewhere, Linda McMahon (5) demonstrates how in touch she is with ordinary Americans, and Issac Stoltzfus (9) goes quite literally nuts. Don't forget the key!

Meg Whitman

A quick public service announcement before I begin this week: if you are a DU member, please take our http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=389&topic_id=9232116&mesg_id=9232116">2010 Member Survey (if you haven't already). We appreciate your feedback!

And now without further ado, let's get started with:

How To Lose $119 Million In One Easy Step
(Click the pics for more info)

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/nov05election/detail?entry_id=39718">

http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/09/meg_whitmans_former_housekeeper.php?ref=fpa">

http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/meg-whitmans-housekeeper-treated-piece-garbage/story?id=11758365">

http://blogs.sfweekly.com/thesnitch/2010/09/meg_whitman_illegal_immigrant_porn.php">

http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5iNwSF1h9JvBjgE8o-IkuVk6-5BGAD9IHTH400?docId=D9IHTH400">

http://www.californiabeat.org/2010/09/30/democratic-attorney-produces-document-backing-claim-whitman-knowingly-employed-undocumented-worker">

http://www.news10.net/news/local/story.aspx?storyid=98414&catid=2">

http://www.pressdemocrat.com/article/20101002/NEWS/101009892/1350?Title=GOP-s-Whitman-blames-Brown-for-housekeeper-flap">

http://articles.cnn.com/2010-09-30/politics/whitman.housekeeper.charges_1_meg-whitman-housekeeper-employment-agency">

http://www.npr.org/blogs/itsallpolitics/2010/09/15/129890179/meg-whitman-sets-new-personal-spending-record---119-million">

Carl Paladino

Carl Paladino is running for Governor of New York this year, a race in which he is currently trailing Democrat Andrew Cuomo. With the election rapidly approaching, Paladino has clearly decided to bring out the big guns -- and shoot himself in both feet.

It turns out that like many people Carl Paladino has a fetish for sending out junk to a wide circle of people on his mailing list. I'm sure you all have at least one family member who does the same thing. There is, however, a fairly important difference between Paladino and your Aunt Flo. I'll let Bob Herbert http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/28/opinion/28herbert.html?_r=1">explain:

Is the Republican candidate for governor of New York a racist, sexist, pornography-loving creep? Or are there other, more benign, explanations for the stomach-turning e-mails distributed by Carl Paladino?

(snip)

Example: A photo showing a group of black men trying to get out of the way of an airplane that is apparently moving across a field. The caption reads: "Run niggers, run."

Example: A doctored photo of President and Mrs. Obama showing the president in a stereotypical pimp's costume holding the hand of the first lady, who is dressed as a prostitute in a grotesquely revealing outfit.

Example: A video clip of a nude couple engaged in intercourse with the title: "Miss France (expletive)." Mr. Paladino characterized it as "a keeper."

Example: An image showing a woman performing a sexual act on a horse.

Meanwhile, http://www.cnn.com/2010/POLITICS/09/30/carl.paladino">according to CNN:

A recent confrontation between New York Republican gubernatorial candidate Carl Paladino and a newspaper columnist illustrates the multimillionaire's brash and unpredictable nature, a political observer said.

"He's got to control himself," said Doug Muzzio, a professor of public policy at Baruch College in New York. "This guy wants to be the governor and is going to start beating up or having reporters hit? It's (got) a Tony Soprano-like quality to it."

On Wednesday, Paladino got into a near-physical altercation with New York Post statehouse columnist Fred Dicker that was captured in an exclusive cell phone video by CNN affiliate YNN Albany.

"You send another goon to my daughter's house and I'll take you out, buddy," Paladino said in an apparent reference to the the New York paper's coverage of a daughter Paladino had out of wedlock.

Oh yes, did I forget to mention that on top of the racism, bestiality, and death threats, Paladino also had a daughter out of wedlock? http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/many_heartaches_of_mrs_paladino_RZHG4hAerxq49GIW1vrr2N">My bad!

It was just about a year ago, hours after the death of her son in a car crash, that Cathy Paladino's husband told her he was the father of a 10-year-old girl with another woman -- and that all their children and most of their friends already knew.

These traumas, still fresh and raw, are compounded by the fact that they are national fodder now that her husband, Carl, is running for governor of New York, something this self-described "very private" woman did not want.

(snip)

During her sit-down with The Post ... Her eyes were perpetually watery, and she brushed tears from her right eye every few minutes, no matter the topic at hand.

Still, she was gamely following the dictate her husband's campaign staff had issued when she wavered on upping her profile.

"They had three words for me: 'Get over it,'" she told The Post.

And I have three words for everyone living in New York State: Vote Andrew Cuomo.

Paul LePage

Meanwhile, it seems that "campaign rage" is becoming a bit of an issue for Tea Party-backed candidates all over the country. Take Paul LePage (R-Teabag), for example, who is running for Governor of Maine. At one point LePage was 18 points up on his Democratic opponent Libby Mitchell, but he has since squandered that lead. This letter from a Maine resident, http://www.huffingtonpost.com/brendan-demelle/paul-lepage-maine-gop-tea_b_745692.html">courtesy of the Huffington Post, might explain why:

I watched in absolute disbelief this past week as Maine politics was immortalized on YouTube and in the news.

I believe that someone who chooses to run for governor should have high ideals, solid plans and a genuine desire to do good for the state of Maine. Paul LePage seems to have none of these. In the past week, I have seen him lie outright about his ownership of land, his paying property taxes in Maine and Florida. I have seen video of him yelling obscenities at reporters and the latest of him telling our president to "go to hell." He appears to be an arrogant, intemperate ideologue who doesn't care a whit about Maine or its people.

I hope that Mainers, of all parties, consider their votes very carefully this fall. What are you voting for -- the next person up at the Comedy Club or someone who can really work constructively for the benefit of us all.

LePage has already shown he's not the person for the job.

Yes, Teabaggers, we get it -- you're angry! So angry, in fact, that you actually have anger management issues.

James O'Keefe

James O'Keefe, the conservative activist and professional Timothy McVeigh impersonator...

...famous for http://www.mediaite.com/online/rachel-maddow-exposes-foxs-bogus-coverage-of-acorn/">bringing down ACORN and http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/05/okeefe_pleads_guilty_in_landrieu_phone_tamper_case.php">sneaking into Sen. Mary Landrieu's office, was back in the news last week when another one of his patented gotchas went hilariously haywire.

O'Keefe was apparently attempting to http://www.cnn.com/2010/US/09/29/okeefe.cnn.prank/">embarrass CNN by getting "Investigative Correspondent Abbie Boudreau onto a boat filled with sexually explicit props and then record the session," and had the whole thing carefully planned out in a http://www.cnn.com/interactive/2010/09/specials/cnn.caper/index.html">13-page document. To give you an idea of what O'Keefe was up to, here's CNN Caper part two: Abbie Boudreau, Section 3. Equipment needed:

Fortunately Abbie Boudreau is not a moron. http://mediamatters.org/strupp/201009290034">According to Media Matters:

Boudreau said she approached O'Keefe that day, but declined to get on the boat.

"I was prepared for him to videotape me," she recalled. "I never believed it would lead to some bizarre Love Boat situation."

Boudreau said when she reached the boat, O'Keefe was dressed up and smoking what appeared to be a fake cigarette: "It was all very theatrical. He was trying to get me on the boat. He was very smooth, with a soothing voice."

Why did O'Keefe try to pull off this bizarre stunt? Aside from the glaringly obvious answer, "He's a raging sociopath," we may never know.

But one thing we do know: O'Keefe's stunt was http://gawker.com/5653907/james-okeefes-sex-dungeon-boat-stunt-too-gross-for-andrew-breitbart">too sleazy even for http://articles.cnn.com/2010-07-22/politics/agriculture.employee.usda_1_sherrod-andrew-breitbart-apology">race-baiting turd Andrew Breitbart, who had collaborated with O'Keefe on some of his previous operations. And if it's too sleazy for Breitbart, you know you've got serious problems...

Linda McMahon

Linda McMahon (R-Obviously) is running for Senate this year in Connecticut. For those of you not familiar with Ms. McMahon, she is the wife of WWE proprieter Vince McMahon, seen here with his pants down as one of his employees pretends to force another one of his employees, who is pretending to be unconscious, to kiss him on the butt, in front of several thousand people.

But that's just an ordinary day in the WWE. What does Linda McMahon have to http://www.ctnewsjunkie.com/ctnj.php/archives/entry/mcmahon_doesnt_rule_out_reducing_minimum_wage">offer to the people of Connecticut, should she be fortunate enough to be elected this November?

Linda McMahon, the Republican candidate for U.S. Senate in Connecticut, suggested Thursday that the U.S. ought to take a second look at the federal minimum wage.

(snip)

During the Q&A, Day of New London reporter Ted Mann asked, "Should it be reduced now? Since businesses are struggling, as you all described? Would you argue for reducing the minimum wage now?"

McMahon responded without a direct answer, which suggested that her door may have been open to reducing the minimum wage standard. McMahon said, "We have got minimum wages in states, we have got minimum wages in the (federal) government, and I think we ought to look at all of those issues in terms of what mandates are being placed on businesses and can they afford them."

Well, fair enough -- I mean, during these tough economic times how are millionaires like the McMahons supposed to scrape by when minimum wage earners are living high on the hog soaking their poor employers for whatever-it-is-per-hour... Hey Linda, remind me again what the minimum wage is?

Pressed further, McMahon admitted she did not know the current minimum wage or if anyone at World Wrestling Entertainment is earning that amount.

Sharron Angle

Nevada's nutty teabagger Senate candidate, Sharron Angle, is running against Harry Reid on a platform of privatizing Social Security and Medicare, and repealing the health care law. Just one slight problem. http://thinkprogress.org/2010/09/28/angle-government-health-care">According to Politico (via Think Progress):

Angle's campaign acknowledged to Nevada journalist Jon Ralston Monday that both the candidate and her husband receive health care from the federal government. Spokeswoman Ciara Matthews said in a statement: "Mr. Ted Angle receives his pension through the (federal) Civil Service Retirement System. While it is not supplemented by the federal government, current civil servants pay into the program to pay the schedule of those already retired -- much like how the Social Security Program works today. Mr. Angle does not qualify -- nor does he receive Social Security benefits. His health insurance plan (the Federal Employee Health Program), which also covers Sharron, is a continuation of what he was receiving while he worked for the federal government."

Let me get this straight: Angle is going around campaigning on a promise to slash everyone else's government benefits, while simultaneously taking advantage of government benefits herself. Maybe her new campaign slogan should be Get Off The Government Tit -- So There's More Room For Me!

The Republican Party

While we're on the subject of slashing government benefits, let's return briefly for a moment to the GOP's "Pledge To America," which got so much attention http://journals.democraticunderground.com/top10/381">last week. It seems the GOP has been doing a little number crunching and, http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2010-10-01/republican-pledge-on-spending-freeze-would-slash-budget-by-100-billion.html">according to Bloomberg News, "would require a Republican-led Congress to cut 21 percent of the $477 billion lawmakers have earmarked for domestic discretionary spending."

"That's where you get the savings," said Representative Paul Ryan, a Wisconsin Republican who would likely be chairman of the Budget Committee if his party regained its majority in the Nov. 2 elections.

So what does that mean for America? Well, it's quite simple really:

A cut of that magnitude would necessitate major reductions in spending likely to spur protests across many fronts ... The Republican pledge to trim $100 billion from discretionary spending puts many programs, such as public education and cancer research, on a potential firing range:

(snip)

A 21 percent cut across the board would take about $15 billion from education. A 21 percent cut in Pell Grants would take almost $5 billion from student tuition.

(snip)

A 21 percent cut at the National Institutes of Health would take about $6 billion from health research.

(snip)

A 21 percent cut would take $400 million from police.

In other words, just when millions of Americans are vulnerable and in need of assistance, here comes the GOP with its mighty budget-crushing sledgehammer of doom, ready to balance the government's books on the backs of police, fire-fighters, children, students, and the sick.

Oh... but don't even think about trying to raise taxes on the very wealthiest Americans by a few percent. Somebody has to think of the multi-millionaires after all.

Fox News

During a http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/17390/209395?RS_show_page=6">recent interview with Rolling Stone, President Obama was asked about his current music collection.

ROLLING STONE: What music have you been listening to lately? What have you discovered, what speaks to you these days?

PRESIDENT OBAMA: My iPod now has about 2,000 songs, and it is a source of great pleasure to me. I am probably still more heavily weighted toward the music of my childhood than I am the new stuff. There's still a lot of Stevie Wonder, a lot of Bob Dylan, a lot of Rolling Stones, a lot of R&B, a lot of Miles Davis and John Coltrane. Those are the old standards.

A lot of classical music. I'm not a big opera buff in terms of going to opera, but there are days where Maria Callas is exactly what I need.

Thanks to Reggie (Love, the president's personal aide), my rap palate has greatly improved. Jay-Z used to be sort of what predominated, but now I've got a little Nas and a little Lil Wayne and some other stuff, but I would not claim to be an expert.

And now here's how Fox News http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/09/29/the-very-brief-life-of-fo_n_743569.html">reported this story on its website FoxNation.com:

Don't bother looking for the story now -- it's been taken down. But rest assured, before it was removed several thousand Fox fans received the message loud and clear: Just in case you'd forgotten folks, the President of the United States is still a scary black man!

Issac Stoltzfus

Okay, this is definitely the "nuttiest" story of the week, as you're about to find out. http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/revolting/judge-stuffed-acorns-condoms">According to the Smoking Gun:

A Pennsylvania judge from the village of Intercourse is facing a disorderly conduct charge for allegedly approaching women near the state Capitol and handing them acorns he had hollowed out and stuffed with condoms, according to cops.

I'll let that sink in for a moment before moving on, shall I?

Yes, according to Capitol Police the honorable judge did indeed "conceal condoms in acorns and then gave them to women who were offended when they discovered the contents." Why did he do this? Who knows.

When confronted by officers last Tuesday, Isaac Stoltzfus, a District Court judge, claimed the bizarre incident was a joke.

A joke you say? So... "Funny ha ha," "Funny peculiar," or "Funny OMG get the fuck away from me you freakshow?" You be the judge! Actually, don't be the judge. The judge is crazy.

When asked for comment James O'Keefe yelled, "Condoms? Intercourse? Acorns? This guy is stealing all my ideas!"

Mitt Romney and John McCain

And finally, with the the mid-term elections just few short weeks away it's time to take a page out of the cable news playbook and focus on the most pressing political issue of the day: who's going to be the Republican nominee for president in 2012?

Currently the front-runner appears to be Mitt Romney -- Republicans love to nominate their previous primary losers, and really, who else is even close to viable at this point? But http://firstread.msnbc.msn.com/_news/2010/09/30/5207131-first-thoughts-the-gops-weak-2012-front-runner">according to MSNBC, it may not be all sunshine and unicorn farts for Romney:

...if Romney is the front-runner, he's starting out at a much weaker position than Bob Dole or John McCain ever did at this point in the '96 and '08 cycles. According to our latest NBC/WSJ poll, Romney's national fav/unfav is upside down at 21%-30%, compared with Dole's net-positive 38%-25% in Sept. '94 and McCain's 40%-16% in June '06. Intensity is a problem, too, for Romney. Just 6% view him VERY positively, versus 14% for Dole in '94 and 11% for McCain in '06.

Let's break down those figures.

1994: Bob Dole
Favorable rating: 38%
Unfavorable rating: 25%
Viewed very positively by: 14%
Result: Lost 1996 presidential election to Bill Clinton by 8.2 million votes

2006: John McCain
Favorable rating: 40%
Unfavorable rating: 16%
Viewed very positively by: 11%
Result: Lost 2008 presidential election to black guy whose middle name is Hussein by 9.5 million votes

2010: Mitt Romney
Favorable rating: 21%
Unfavorable rating: 30%
Viewed very positively by: 6%
Result: ????

Meanwhile, there was some sad news from the presidential trail last week as John McCain made a big announcement: he will not be running in 2012. The 105-year-old Senator from Arizona http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/39474467/ns/us_news">told an audience in New Hampshire that "this may surprise you, but I will not be running for president again."

He then paused, scratched his head, and said, "Where the hell am I and how did I get here?"

See you next week!

-- EarlG

The Top 10 Conservative Idiots, No. 382 [View All]