Reply #15: I used to cut, [View All]

and one thing I can tell you that you really need to remember, is ALWAYS be calm about it.
My mom freaked out on me and that made it worse. Medication didn't help. I only ever had one counselor that I liked, and that was because all he did was *talk* with me- he didn't write things down in front of me or ask awkward questions.

Anyways like I said, always make sure you are very calm when talking about it- cutters are usually pretty fragile and overly sensitive to tones of voice. If you sound angry or really upset, it may drive a cutter to go do it again later that night.
I understand teens aren't easy, I wasn't and neither is my brother. See if you guys can go out and do something... like just go out for dinner or coffee & pie, just the two of you.

In my family (and it was a dysfunctional family) my mom was a nervous wreck, my brother had severe anger problems, and I had really bad anxiety issues (still do) and depression. My mom didn't always have a lot of time for us, because at times she had to work two jobs to get by. But, she tried to take us out, seperately, every other week at the very least. So that we could both have one on one time with her- and it helped both of us a lot. For the time being it may not be best to bring up emotionally charged subjects, unless your kid brings them up- but try to talk about things you both like, and make sure to just show that you are there and you care.

Cutters generally don't need psyche evaluations or meds or anything, they just need to know that they aren't alone and they are understood.

Sometimes emotions get SO intense, that physical pain is the only thing that can take away from it. It is hard for most people to understand, but all it is is a coping mechanism.

Last but not least... it wasn't my mom that made me stop. She did, however, make me feel better enough not to do it very often. It might take something else to make him completely stop, but it is going to be a decision made by him, on his own.
What stopped me was when my ex boyfriend's neice saw my cuts, as I didn't adequately cover them that day- and I had to lie to her about it. It broke my heart to lie to such a sweet little girl who obviously cared for me so much. I decided to stop so that I would never have to lie to my future kid about it. I haven't cut in about 3-4 years now- and you can only see the scars if you look up really close. They have to be pointed out.

Anyways, I hope my reply helps you a bit. Good luck, and PM me if you want to talk about this any more.