Reply #41: You ask [View All]

Are we at a point where we can no longer assume people will act with a moderate level of awareness and consideration?

We're there. And have been for some time.

An example...on another list a woman was complaining about her in-laws. She couldn't understand why they were upset because she made them wait outside the house until her precious little darling woke up from his nap. In the middle of winter. Wouldn't let them in until he got up so they wouldn't disturb him. And she was getting support from everyone else for that attitude. Guess who'll be running that house before he's 3. (She just couldn't understand why anyone would expect her to inconvenience the child for ANY reason)

She's not the only one. We see it so much nowadays and it is just maddening. Yes, kids need to be kids, but adults also need to be adults. How do kids ever learn to share and be part of a community if all they ever see is people bowing and scraping to THEM?

I rarely ever took mine shopping unless I went early in the morning when they were fresh or right after a nap for the same reason. Fed and awake, you have less chance of misbehavior. I NEVER, ever bought anything they asked for while we were out so they never came to expect it and I don't think mine ever had more than 1 tantrum in public. (Saying "little boy, I think we need to find your mother" as if I didn't know him was enough to end it) We didn't take them to adult restaurants until they had been to eat-in McDonald's and the like enough times to know how to behave. Just like learning to walk before you learn to run. We did our best not to put them into situations where they were likely to be bored or lured into being brats. Allowing them to learn in increments.

Were they angels? Hell no. In fact, I could take them anywhere and got complimented on how well they behaved but get them home and it was Jekyll/Hyde time. And I thought the youngest would probably end up floating his school down the river.

More than I meant to write when I started this. Sorry about that.