This is why I believe Mike Malloy matters [View All]

“He puts one of yours in the hospital, you put one of his in the morgue."

We're a crippled bunch, kids, because for far too long the bully has had his way. Our other cheek is cut and bruised, and every time we walk away they yell "coward" and "traitor" as they point their fingers at the cause of all their trouble. They ask us to work together, and while we foolishly comply they stick another shiv in the weary body and tell us we just don’t try hard enough.

Then, they get behind their bought and paid for microphones and for hours on end tell us we’re shit. Day after day, night after night, lie after filthy lie, the garbage that spews forth unchecked from their mouths would put a Democrat on trial and a black man in jail, but they keep it up. Hypocrisy rules the roost, but not a peep from the puppet masters about it, for the fault lies not within themselves, but in those who foolishly believe the other side.

So one day this guy comes on the radio, he shines a light on the vermin, and he starts to talk. And he doesn’t stop until he throws every last bit of garbage right back at them, and when they’re covered in pig shit and reeking like the city dump he pushes them out on center stage and says “America, THIS is what they truly are.” He is, of course, entirely correct.

He does this without fail, night after night, because someone has to. While the Casper Milquetoasts parade their Republican friends across the radio dial in some bizarre Rodney King fantasy the other side continues to shoot real bullets, and Mike Malloy continues to shoot back. These bastards are killers, true bon-a-fide psychotic bastards, and finally someone has the balls to sit next to a radio mike and tell everyone the truth. They are slime, pure unadulterated filth, and for the first time in a very long time someone is pretending it is America again and is telling the truth. With anger, with tears, with bombast, and with contempt, somebody is making me sit at home on a Tuesday evening and say “thank you.”

Sadly, the truth hit too close to home, and somebody somewhere decided that TruthLite is the way to go, lest we offend a soccer mom/dad somewhere who might be put off hearing that Bush ignored 9/11. No, it’s best that we put someone on who won’t cross that line, but who will say with a quivering voice “Mr. Bush, you were very bad today” as the bullets fly. The other side, you see, doesn’t care how you say it - it’s the fact that you merely say it at all that causes the fight. So we tell the mother of all street fighters to go home, and as we call in the brand new MakeNice players we ask them to please tell everyone about the bullies, but be sure and play nice even if they steal your lunch money, or if they steal your job, or if they steal your life.

Fuck nice - why not send the bastards to the morgue?