I present you the anti-Duggars. (Story is 20 days old and nobody posted it at DU. Shame on you all.) [View All]

Two fathers
by Dheera Sujan
24-04-2008

Aad and Ron Dissel de Boo tell the story of how they once went to a conference in the USA to talk of their experiences in raising children. Before the spoke, a woman came up to them and told them forthrightly that she didn't agree that homosexuals should be allowed to raise children, because it went against traditional family values.

And then they went on the podium and told their story. Later the same woman came to them in tears to apologise for what she had said earlier. "And then she wrote to us later," says Ron laughing in his booming bass. "She said that she had our photo on a notice board in her office with a sign underneath it that read ‘they opened my heart and my eyes.'"

It's a telling anecdote. And after having spent an afternoon in their company, I know exactly what caused such a radical transformation in that woman. 25 years ago, Aad and Ron decided that they had room in their hearts and in their lives to adopt a child. The Dutch Child Welfare Agency demurred. A young homosexual couple with a child went against the accepted wisdom and in the Christian conservative Holland of that time; there was no precedent for it.

First and second child
1st and 2nd childBut they persisted and eventually, almost as a gesture of ill will, the Agency pointed them towards Huup. He was 14 years old, mentally handicapped, had been severely abused, and had gone through several foster homes. But Aad and Ron took him in and brought him up. Huup, now 27, lives with them still. After Huup had been with them for a while, the couple decided they wanted a younger child, so they went back to the Child Welfare Agency and were again met with protests. Nevertheless, they were then assigned Michel, a mentally disturbed 9-year-old whose parents had kept him chained in a closet for six years. Michel was incontinent, couldn't speak, and needed to be taught the basics, like a giant toddler. (...)

Third child
3rd childWhen Michel was 11, Aad and Ron decided they wanted a baby this time. The Agency reacted predictably: "A baby needs a mum," they were told, but Ron replied: "I can be a mum." And so they got Michael, a one-and-a-half year old, mentally challenged and also with a background of abuse and neglect. When they got him, Michel still hadn't been introduced to solids, so he drank only enormous quantities of milk. His inadequate diet meant that he couldn't really move his lower body, but Aad and Ron fell in love with him immediately. He's now a hulking 17-year-old who also lives at home still. (More at link.)