It's Brilliant, We Love It - Now GO HOME! [View All]

During the eight-year nightmare that was the W administration, the Republicans – elected politicians, their spokespeople and their supporters, were the bane of my existence. I was typically enraged on a daily basis by the never-ending lies, deceit, hypocrisy and stupidity.

After little more than a year of Obama in office, and the Democrats in control of Congress, life seems a little more sane. I can watch the President meeting with world leaders, and not cringe at the thought he might do something immensely humiliating. I can listen to him speak, and hear reason and coherent thought being articulated. I can read about his accomplishments and what he yet hopes to achieve, and appreciate the feeling of movement – of a nation being put back on track, and a slow-but-sure undoing of the damage done by the previous idiots in charge.

And so the GOP has gone from being a thorn in my side to being an endless source of amusement, that is now bordering on unstoppable hilarity – their every statement or public appearance the most laugh-inducing “reality show” ever devised.

Honestly, you can’t make this shit up – and yet they persist in doing so, day after day, week after week. I just wonder when it’s going to dawn on them that, in light of recent events and pronouncements from their own, they would have been better off settling for irrelevance rather than persist in proving, beyond all doubt, what many of us have long suspected: they’re all batshit crazy.

It started with proffering a doddering old man as a presidential candidate, followed by his proffering of a brainless idiot as a viable vice-president. Yep, you betcha! A woman who couldn’t name a single newspaper she’s ever read was going to take up the reins of government and steer its course through already-troubled waters – or not, if she got bored with the job a few months in and opted for a TV show instead.

It should have ended there – an acceptance of humiliating defeat, and a collective vow to regroup and do better in future.

But, as we all know, it didn’t end there – not by a longshot.

Instead the craziness escalated.

We’ve heard about death panels that don’t exist, insistence on bipartisan efforts that you refuse to participate in, your ire at a rising national debt which you encouraged during the BushCo years.

It’s almost astonishing to think back on W’s comments about human-animal hybrids as being the most ridiculous thing to come out of a GOPer’s mouth – a benchmark that has been surpassed – and then some.

We now have people on the crazy side of the aisle advocating bartering for healthcare services with live chickens – uh, no, really.

Like I said, you can’t make this shit up.

This is a heartfelt message to those on the Republican side: please, please, please go away. The truth is that as much as we, the sane, are amused by your antics, we’re embarrassed for you. As much as we’ve wanted to see your party, and everything it stands for, go down in flames – we really didn’t foresee this kind of suicide-by-self-humiliation being played out in public. It’s kind of pathetic – okay, extremely pathetic, and we’d rather you just moseyed on into the sunset, accompanied by Georgie playing the gee-tar, as he’s a wont to do when people are drowning.

Maybe you’re just hangin’ around like the Ghost of America past – the ogre that scared folks into buying duct-tape, terrorized the populace with tales of religious extremists at-the-ready to take over the local mall, frightened the fanatically-inclined with stories about death panels – and now you just want a few kudos for your efforts before fading into obscurity.

Okay, I hear ya – so here goes:

You were fantastic, wonderful, beyond imaginingly GRRREAT! The years you had control of the country will go down in history as the best we ever knew: the war predicated on WMDs that never existed, the surplus left by one president squandered – and then turned into a record-breaking deficit by your guy – OH, those were the TIMES!

In the worst of days, YOU never flinched. You watched, slack-jawed, as the WTC came down on your watch – and then bragged over and over about your proven record when it came to keeping the homeland safe!

You were SWELL – no, really!!! From day one to the Armageddon of your party, you never abandoned the thought that YOU were ridin’ high – and you’ve had a cheerleading MSM to tout your good works every step of the way!

Words fail. You. Were. Just. That. Awesome.

You were brilliant, we loved it – now go home. You’re done. You’re washed-up, washed-out, irrelevant, incomprehensible, over-tanned, over-spent, overwrought, a shadow of your former self, a mere smudge of ink in the history of a great nation, a never-to-be-forgotten scourge that just keeps hangin’ round like a stalker ex-boyfriend who breathes into your answering machine for fifteen minutes every night in the sincere belief that most people find that kind of behavior irresistible.

Really. I’m asking nicely.

Please take your we-know-illegals-by-their-clothes, good-Christians-condone-torture, I-can’t-spell-amnety-but-I-know-I’m-against-it, McVeigh-reference-applauding, FAUX-News-watching, tub-o’-lard-Limbaugh-listening, Teabaggin’ knuckle-draggers with you – AND GO AWAY.

It’s not for my sake. It’s for your own.

You’re embarrassing yourselves. And what’s more, you know it. And the fact that you don’t care that you know it says everything that needs to be said.