US babies get corporate brand names

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/3268161.stm

Americans are increasingly turning to the world of popular culture to name their children, a study has found.

Children have been named after big brands as diverse as beauty company L'Oreal, car firm Chevrolet and designer clothes company Armani.

There are even two little boys, one in Michigan and one in Texas, called ESPN after the sports channel.

Seven boys were found to have the name Del Monte - after the food company - and no less than 49 boys were called Canon, after the camera. In some cases it seems something else was on some parents' minds - six boys were named after Courvoisier cognac.

If I met someone who named their kids after a fucking PRODUCT I'd laugh at them. To their faces. Yet another sign of rampant consumerism...what sort of twit names their kid "Chevelle" or "Courvoisier", anyway?

named her kid Alize, after the liquor... :eyes:

that my parents didn't name me "Jack Daniels" or "Jim Beam"...although either of those is at least an actual NAME and not a word made up by someone in some marketing department somewhere...

I named my daughter after my father whose name is Jordan Alexander...actually my son is Alex and my daughter is Jordan.

I was grocery shopping with her a couple of years ago and she brought me some pre-packaged deli meat made by..."Jordans"! How was I to know when I named her Jordan in 1984 that there would be a meat named Jordans? At least I didn't name her Kotex or Tampax.

of the names cited as being much of a trend. While I don't dig through the actual records like the person cited in the article, I do notice the names of children in schools, on the playground, whereever I come across them.

As the researcher noted, a lot of parents are obsessed with the idea of their child having a "unique" name, which often leads to bizarre spellings of otherwise ordinary names, or a pronunciation which doesn't quite match the spelling, leading to a lifetime of having to explain and spell the name.

When I had my two kids, I wanted a reasonably ordinary name, but not one that everyone seemed to be giving to their kids. I wound up with a Patrick and a Jonah. And all too often I find that "Jonah" is a name that gives people trouble, which really astonishes me. Oh, well, it could be worse, I'm sure.

In the world brought to you by the daily newspaper, one's an anecdote, two's a trend. If a feature writer in Dallas sees a few of her kid's school buddies doing something stupid, it gets written up as a "trend piece" for the paper. When a slow news week hits, it gets picked up by papers around the country. Soon, everyone's talking about a "trend" that isn't really happening. "All the kids are tatooing product logos on their palms!" "Kids are snorting the cheese powder from the mac and cheese boxes to get high!" "Every kid is wearing pro-bowling jerseys!"

It may be stupid, but it's easy to write. And, it's not controversial, and doesn't offend advertisers.

Gotta love the state of the press these days.

how about bushco? bushco johnson. good american name, no? 8^)

several years ago. Chris Farley and I think Damon Wayans (and a few others) were camp counselors calling kids to the bus. It was hysterical.

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/94/94qdaycamp.phtml

Later,
JM

could be pronouced Espen or Espin which is a Norwiegen name.

My wife and I had picked Espen as a possible name boy name for our child. ....Espen Bredeson, a famous ski jumper...at least in Norway anyway...

or a camera? I think that these names were chosen because of the way that they sounded. I have a son named Dakota, and I didn't name him after the state or the Indian name that it represents. I just liked the name.

That is disgusting.

..I'd get it over with and pitch myself off a bridge.

:P

spelled "Orangejello" and "Lemonjello"....I think their sister is F'Mali (spelled FEMALE)

Hell, it can't be any worse then the flood of Justins, Micahs, Britneys, Tiffanys, etc....

I had been named after my favorite scotch whiskey:

Laphroaig

And shaking off the mantel of ethnocentrism is probably the most blinding log one might ever attempt to remove from ones eye.

I live in a very diverse community where a multitude of races, religions, occupations, ethnicity, social status, etc. are widely represented throughout a broad spectrum. Homogeneity is not the norm in our schools, housing, grocery stores, hardware stores, coffee shops, etc.

My brother lives twenty miles away in a community that is 99.9% Caucasian, reliant on SUVs to trudge into the city, white bread, NASCAR and Rush loving, etc......you get the idea.

Mine and my brothers children are roughly the same age and one day we compared the first names of each of their 5th grade classmates.

My nephews classmates names are as follows: Daniel, Katie, Tony, Lisa, Carl, Patrick, Chris, John, Alan, Jessie, Brandon, Emily, Cynthia, Jessica, Sarah, Charles, Jack, Jack, Michael, etc.

My sons classmates names are as follows: Dashaun, James, Ricardo, Shontai, Isaac, Que, Franceska, Zachary, Nabeelah, Dymyrty, Veryl, Anne, Mark, Whitney, Etienne, Tierria, Charles, Donathyn, Linnea, David, Jumario, Aditi, Molly, Ashley, Che' Lari, Jessica, Jamial, Suami, John, Veronica, Delnitra, Jasmine,etc.

Get the picture.

My personal favorites are : Mar'keta, Jasmine, Savannah, Sirmichael, Alisha, Madhura, Vashawn, Yutaka, Ladislau, Chalon, Lekieshia, Chalese, Muhammad, Tazzmean,Donte', Keaunna, Takiya, Yan, Jonah, Marcelius, Abie, Ali, Ramon, Demetrius, Jontue, Ikia, Arneida, Tho, Jade, Chun-Mei, Joshua, Tiauna, Seratu, Marcus, (no way I can say etc. at this point).

JUST AS AN ASIDE: We visited parts of Oregon several years ago and my children both commented on how bizzare it felt to be in cties, stores, restaurants, etc. where there were only white people. And our family is Caucasian.

Rethinking differences

But you don't see a Nike on that list.

Non-eurocentric names are one thing. They can be beautiful and are a testament to the diverse nature of our country.

However, names that are chosen based on brand loyalty can be seen as an effect of the commercialization of our society. Not quite as beautiful.

I dread to think of the stick a kid called Coca-Cola for instance would get at school. Myself, I am already lumbered withan unquestionably silly full name and I can honstly say that I would rather be nice & simple on the name front.

You can PM me about the full name if you wish but I doubt will answer you. Im off to Sheffield anyway. See ya!

Maybe they were beholden to the god Nike because the kids birth labor was so swift.
And then a missle back in the 60s?
Maybe they were war-mongering rocket-lovers.
Maybe they like the sound of it....Nigh-Kee!

Greek, I believe.

about product names being used for children. That's the part that seems really odd to me. I'm an urban girl and all the names you listed have a familiar sound to them. But naming a child a product name seems both strange and revealing about our culture. Will we someday meet children named Pepsi? Seems almost a satirical statement about corporate culture.

of every aspect of our lives.

These names, not because they are different, but because they are the names of BRANDS, are grotesque and disgusting.

And you have to be kidding yourself if this trend isn't going to continue to spike among all races.

This isn't about Black, White, Brown, Red, Yellow or whatever. It is about dignity.

This is fucking creepy.

she couldn't think of one until she happened to be in a drug store and Eureka! saw Milton Bradley crayons on a counter

so i could make the claim that i was named after a crayon

Yeah I think it is a little strange to name your kid after a product but some of those words don't sound too bad. Couvasier (spelling?) makes a good name. Do you think people who named their kid Canon were thinking of the camera? Maybe they like the word.

My name is Marcus btw. I never thought of it as "unique" but saw it on your list. (I suppose I am the only white guy I know named Marcus who actually goes by Marcus and not Mark.)

Twenty years ago in Japan they were naming their kids Panasonic, Television and other such weirdness. But for some reason, in Japan you got the feeling that people were doing it in the spirit of some kind of post-modern hipness.

Is it hilarious or tragic that when American consumatrons do it, it sounds more like some kind cognitive dissonance between consumerism and our own souls?

But I guess that's inevitable in a culture where the sense of human value is so distorted that the only suggested response to the 9/11 attacks was for Americans to go shopping -- and no one seemed to notice the bizarreness (is that a word?) of it. I guess consuming is basically all we're here for in this new age of rabid self-interest and corporate supremecy.

We are ourselves both consumer and product -- a highly engineered self-replicating consumer base. Perfect!

(Don't mind me. Things have just become so mind-bendingly nonsensical in the news lately, I have to indulge my sense of irony.)

And not because I am pandering to the NFL but because when I was pregnant and at DFW I tripped and Peyton Manning was there to help me up.

Good guy classy chap and there to help an off balance pregnant woman up to her feet. No American Airline employee in sight I might add.

That my Peyton is a she is no bother to me. Peyton means warrior in Scotland (and I am an Irish lass no less) and I dare any DUer to spend a day with her and tell me she isn't aptly named.

My GAWD braveheart has nothing on her!

But naming children after products is just so fucking depraved.

Children are GIFTS not fucking commodities.

When he helped you up in the airport, did you say "I'm naming my baby after you?" Petyon is really pretty for a girl's name too, IMO.

Latrine. I kid you not. My brother is a criminal defense attorney and came across the mom who name her daughter this. Yup, he thought to himself, men are going to crap all over her in life.

was spelled Sharmyn but it was still toilet paper.

This prolly should be in the lounge but it ain't my call.
:D

bar codes on their bodies. Count on it.

Now that woud clearly be the Mark of the Beast and the true sign that the End Times are upon us......

Sarcasam off now, sorry

A friend of mine was competing for the affections of a waitress at a local restaurant, with a waiter who also worked there, and this waiter had (has) a bar code tattoo on his wrist. We referred to him as "Mark."

"Competing for the affections of"? And I'm not even reading any Jane Austen.

It's true. She filled out an application for a job in Savannah.

...in our local paper years ago and there was a woman who had named her daughter Vendetta. I hope we aren't going to have to start keeping dictionaries in delivery rooms.

for some reason I'm reminded of the character Mafia Winsome from "V."...

one reason for the popularity of brands as names is a growing desire on the part of parents to mark their children out as different.

It's been a while since I was a kid, but as I recall, being singled out and marked as different was not a good thing. When I think of naming a child I think of finding names from the beauty in nature and our world, Aurora, Rose, or names that mean a positive trait. Del Monte isn't one that comes to mind. I know the economy is bad but the grocery store is no substitute for a baby name book.

What's your corporate name? Kinda like a star wars name.

Farina
Kibbles
Oreo
Oscar Mayer
Baco's
Chef Boyardee

Then it is for the child itself to be unique and special by his or her own personality. I don't think it is for the parents to go that far out on a limb to mark the kid out with a silly name. Daft names only serve IMHO to invite playground abuse for the child.

Tapping Reeve (founder of a Connecticut Law School)? Normal in their day.

All of my names are family names, ie first name=mother maiden name middle=granmother maiden name, etc... Unique, and fair since there is only room for 1 last name.

I am sure this one has been discussed before. Gov. Jim Hogg of Texas named his daughter Ima. So weird or cruel names go back forever probably.

... I came across an actual name: Richard Head.

Myself, I was named after the American League (yoooo can call me Al, call me Al...)

nt

Someday, Halliburton, all this will be yours...

but on the other hand the parents could make a contract with the respective company since their childrens are advertising carriers...

for the same type/category of items.

with names like these, can May O'Naize or Norman Conquest be too far off?

We should ask Mr. Evans to complete his research :)

for me to change my name to Charles Goodyear or Ferruccio Lamborghini???

Corporate Children.

I used to work with a girl named Velvetta. No kidding! What a cheesy name... ha ha ha.

http://www.notwithoutmyhandbag.com/babynames/index.html

Read up and enjoy.
This has been posted at DU before, but this is the perfect thread for it.
This is some seriously funny stuff.

I think that's the one. Great link. funny and sad at the same time.

We could have names like Die Hard, Terminator
We could even extend like Terminator II, Terminator III

Let's be more creative, what about weapons? What about A1, M16, B1, F16, F22...

Just a selection of ones I found interesting:

Canidate, Trung RB, Washington Redskins
Carter, Ki-Jana RB, New Orleans Saints
Cason, Aveion RB, Dallas Cowboys
Cobourne, Avon RB, Detroit Lions
Goodspeed, Joey RB, St. Louis Rams
Holmes, Priest RB, Kansas City Chiefs
McAllister, Deuce RB, New Orleans Saints
McCullough, Sultan RB, Washington Redskins
Smith, Onterrio RB, Minnesota Vikings
Smith, Detron RB, Indianapolis Colts
Pinner, Artose RB, Detroit Lions
Arnold, Charon WR, San Francisco 49ers
Burress, Plaxico WR, Pittsburgh Steelers
Price, Peerless WR, Atlanta Falcons
Adams, Flozell T, Dallas Cowboys
McDougle, Stockar T, Detroit Lions
Smith, Marvel T, Pittsburgh Steelers
Diggs, Na'il OLB, Green Bay Packers
Ekuban, Ebenezer DE, Dallas Cowboys
Truluck, R-Kal DE, Kansas City Chiefs
Zellner, Peppi DE, Washington Redskins
Hunt, Cletidus DT, Green Bay Packers
LaFavor, Tron DT, Chicago Bears
Pope, Monsanto DT, Denver Broncos
Roye, Orpheus DT, Cleveland Browns
Butler, Jerametrius CB, St. Louis Rams
Milloy, Lawyer SS, Buffalo Bills
Prather, Pig DB, Cincinnati Bengals
Williams, Tank SS, Tennessee Titans
Bailey, Champ CB, Washington Redskins

I once met a young lady named Sarissa. That, at least, is how the name was pronounced. A sarissa, as we all know, was the Macedonian hoplite spear, a deadly innovation in its day because it was two feet longer than the standard Greek spear. It took a professional to handle it well, but it gave Philip and Alexander's Macedonians a significant advantage. What a cool name for a girl.

But then it turned out she spelled her name Cerissa. That is, apparently, a perfume, though I've never heard of it. Oh well, the parents were suburban California types, so they couldn't be expected to know any better.

I can't remember which corporation bought it, but several years ago someone named their sweet baby after a product for $250,000. They said they were getting paid for advertising for the company, and the money would go into a college trust fund. Bullshit. I bet they've run through every last dime of it.

they had a brother- his name? Howard.

Seriously, those sound like the sort of names porn actresses, strippers and call girls use. Guess if they ever go into the adult industry, they'll already have the names for it...

and then got all upset because by high school she was known by all her friends as "Candy Lace"...like he couldn't see it coming? :crazy:

he's gonna be a CEO one day. :-)