Susan Faludi : Conan the Vulgarian

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He comes out of the testosterone-ruled world of weight rooms and action movies, where women are the designated observers and adorners, and where men find their place in the wolf pack through a well-established ordeal of hazing and humiliation.

The men who don't make it to the top in that world still have the compensation of identifying with the one man who does, as long as they don't identify with any of the women, as long as they don't "say nothing." They still belong to the pack, by virtue of being male.

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Women's anger about rape and harassment is exacerbated by the knowledge that their attackers are after power, not sex. In American politics, it's the opposite. Harassment is deemed more acceptable if it's not about sex but is part of a locker room power dynamic between the boys. The gender gap is really between those afraid of bullying and those afraid of intimacy. Women will forgive a politician's lapse if it at least seems motivated by a susceptibility to desire or emotion. Men afraid of sensuality will forgive the same act (and actor) as long as the behavior can be laughed off as winner-take-all sport.

http://www.latimes.com/news/opinion/commentary/la-op-faludi5oct05,1,7785362.story?coll=la-news-comment-opinions

I'm glad all women don't think like Ms. Estrich.

According to Faludi, Clinton's philanderings enflamed males rather than females precisely because he seduced rather than abused women. Arnold's is the opposite. Faludi's take is refreshing, in that it somewhat explains the "double standard" that gets hurled back and forth between the genders.

Men: "You women are such hypocrites, ya let Slick Willy off the hook, but blame Arnold for having some fun."

Women: "Like you're one to talk. For 10 years, it's Clinton-this, Clinton-that, Clinton-the-oval-office-predator, but now Arnold gets a bye for worse."

Faludi actually has a theory that fits the data.

I have to wonder, though, sometimes it seems like women, especially younger women, are attracted to the most abusive males. Is it instinct to seek out the alpha male, and open abusiveness is an alpha trait?

Keeping in mind, though, that all this Alpha bulls**t works for people whose thinking is on an animal level.

A lot of people are being drawn to this cockamamie "Alpha" theory, which its author, Lionel Tiger (yes, that's his real name), insists only works for pack mammals, and not even very well for most primates.

It's a form of reductionism gussied up to look like it's nature's way of doing things. But human grew brains so they wouldn't have to deal with the evolutionarily ruinous strategy or relying on "Alphas" to protect their groups. Brains worked so much better than chest-thumping.

Women like it, but so do men. The key is to give the Alpha-lovers what they want, good and hard ... but consensually. And preferably in the bedroom, not the voting booth.

--bkl