Cheney family offers $25-million reward for Vice-President's whereabouts

July 31, 2003

“We heard that he was at a fundraiser last weekend, but by the time we got there he was gone,” said a distraut Lynne Cheney.

WASHINGTON — Members of the Cheney family held a tearful press conference today, begging the public or government for information that could reunite them with Vice-President Dick Cheney.

“The secure undisclosed location has gone too far,” said an emotional Lynne Cheney. “It’s one thing for him to be safe as he’s under a constant threat, but he could at least return my phone calls.”

In addition to Mrs. Cheney, both grown daughters, Mary and Elizabeth, and the three grandchildren, Kate, Elizabeth, and Grace, spoke through tears to the assembled press.

“Grandaddy used to help me with my homework, but he’s been away for a long time,” Kate said. “I have to repeat the 3rd grade now. Please come home, Granddad!”

Pentagon officials expressed regret at seeing the Cheney family so upset, but reminded them that this is an issue of national security. “For the well-being of the nation, we’ve got to keep him out of the public eye. What if, God forbid, he were to have another heart attack and there were cameras rolling?”

n/t

Mrs. Cheney should know by now Dick doesn't return anybodies phone calls.

But I'm still laughing about Bush endorsing Lieberman.

Goes with this t-shirt!




http://www.cafeshops.com/wcdems2