Squirrels Chase an ACORN

Squirrels Chase an ACORN
By David Glenn Cox



Pee Wee Herman AKA Paul Rueben's television career was ruined when he was caught masturbating in an adult movie theatre. But that career-ending event happened B.F. before Fox, today Fox network anchors now routinely try to jerk us off in broad daylight with some invention of fantasy.

They point fingers and claim bias in every media source save themselves, so and so is in the tank for Obama. The media is trying to manipulate the electorate, the polls can’t be trusted, they’re all in the tank for Obama. You know, a smart merchandiser would try to capitalize on them by selling official Fox and Friends tin foil hats. The possibilities are endless, the official morning vodka of Fox and Friends. How about Steve Doocey doing product endorsements, “You know when I’m hearing those voices in my head I take Amisulpride. Amisulpride will get you right back in this crazy old world, back in the swing of things. Don’t miss that Republican rally or planning session because the CIA is listening to your thoughts again, take Amisulpride!”

Weeks of diatribes against William Ayers and now ACORN Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now, has become their target. Fox News has called them radical and leftists, “They’re hiring lazy crack heads and ex felons to do their voter registration drives!” Well, if they’re lazy crack heads then don’t worry about it and if they’re ex felons, so what, Fox News has a long list of ex felons in their employment. Oliver North for instance, G. Gordon Liddy just to name a few. But who does Fox hire as their expert in voter fraud? Why none other than Ken Blackwell, and he would know something about the subject now wouldn’t he?

Blackwell was the subject of over 16 lawsuits after the 2004 election for Ohio voter suppression. Then he ran for Governor in a Republican leaning state and could only draw 34% of the electorate despite championing the Republican big three, guns rights, taxes and abortion. When asked by Fox if ACORN was registering Republicans Blackwell scoffed saying, “By accident, maybe,” Wait, you mean those lazy crack heads and ex-felons are so well trained that they can spot a Republican voter from a distance?

Fox railed and tells anecdotes of a man that registered 70 times and of the Dallas Cowboys being registered to vote in Nevada. “This is criminal!” Doocy cries. Yes, it is Steve and ACORN should be very angry, they pay these lazy crack heads and ex-felons by the registration. As a county polling officer I can speak from authority that the county then takes the registration and enters it into the data base, Name, address, age and if someone else appears with the same data the card is set aside and you get a nice letter from the registrars. One vote, that’s all you get.

From my little desk, I can access every legal voter in the state of Georgia. When you come in and get your ballot my computer will automatically mark that you have voted. You can register ten million times but you can still only vote once. Now the systems is not perfect if you are registered in several different precincts all with different addresses then it is possibly to vote more than once. If ten Steve Doocy’s registered with ten different ID’s and ten different street addresses then it would be possible to commit voter fraud. Have no doubt however that the state of Georgia doesn’t hire crack heads to run elections and ten Steve Doocy’s all the same age with ten different addresses would be noticed.

The Bureau of elections would add an icon to those names, the icon means check to your ID closely before giving you a ballot. Think fast Steve, which ID do you use at which precinct? You only get one chance, then I send you down the road or you can vote provisional and that ballot will have to be verified before being counted. It’s going to be a long day Steve, waiting in ten lines, charging from poll to poll. Ten is probably all you could manage in twelve hours. Almost not worth that much trouble is it? All that work for just ten votes.

Instead it would be more efficient to use a television network that’s “In the tank” to broadcast round the clock with stories of non-sense and made up conspiracies. Of bogeymen and terrorists and scary people under the stairs. The Fox anchors then go on to point out that Obama as a community organizer also worked in voter registration drives. Oh, I see it now, Obama is Acorn and Acorn is Obama! Funny, but do you know what my little election computer won’t tell me? What party you registered with, you must tell me which ballot you want in party elections.

That information doesn’t matter to the board of registrars. Then those phony registrations that do make it through the system and do run from poll to poll on election day could just as easily be voting for John McCain and ACORN and Barack Obama would never no the difference. I guess that why it’s so important to hire only the best trained lazy crack heads and ex-felons. Pee Wee! Where are you Pee Wee? Your career is waiting for you at Fox News! Unless of course you’re in the tank for Obama.