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Edited on Thu Oct-22-09 12:55 AM by FarrenH
and no, I wasn't one of their Johns, just a friend getting the straight dope. Sex hasn't been sacred for me since I let go of sexual jealousy. I've had mercy sex with people and just plain curious and completely unsatisfying sex with people who I have no attraction to and in a society where prostitution has no stigma attached to it, and a country less afflicted by AIDS and other killers (I'm from South Africa) I would have no problem selling my own body for sex, if the conditions were decent and the pay was good.
Denying that people are capable of trading sex for money in any context without psychological scarring, shame et al, is normative dialog along very much the same lines as suggesting gays are psychologically ill. It employs the same circular reasoning as homophobia did in the past. In societies where homosexuality is viewed with near universal horror, homosexuals must be deceptive, circumspect and, when confronted, acknowledge their shame and dysfunction as a way of ameliorating condemnation, thus reinforcing the perception that their sexuality is innately shameful.
Its foisting your sexual boundaries on others and insisting that they're either mentally ill or immoral if they don't share those boundaries. Conversely, claiming anyone who would pay for sex is dysfunctional and cruel and abusive by default is equally presumptious. Hell, I'd pay for sex if it weren't legally risky, medically risky, likely to offend some of my puritanical friends if it got out, and unlikely to be satisfying because the lingering imprint of shame from my Catholic upbringing make me feel more uncomfortable than stimulated in a strip joint (to which I have been twice in my life, for stag nights). And I would respect the sex worker who provided it and not abuse them.
Which is why the sex-negative, prostitution-prohibition position is always so strongly premised on phenomenological arguments like "80% of prostitutes were abused as children". Well colour me surprised. One of the most stigmatised professions attracts a lot of broken humans? One of the least regulated, least protected professions which even where its legal gets little workplace protection and sympathy from inspectors, courts and police, is rife with abuse? People with a strong motive to win pity out of moral condemnation frequently testify to a backstory that may or may not be real but certainly wins them the mantle of victimhood?
On another thread, the claim was made by someone who lived around prostitutes that they all hated their Johns and would get out in the blink of an eye if they could. This said as if such widespread sentiment must be viewed through a lens that does not acknowledge the role of history, religion, sexism and simple, monogamous jealousy in shaping the profession's status. You will hear the same thing from anyone who is in a profession that is not respected, even those that aren't morally condemned.
What is noticeably lacking from both puritanical left and right positions on prostitution is any kind of coherent argument showing why prositution will, under all conceivable situations, involve massive exploitation. The reverse possibility is treated as an impossibility. The assumption is that even in a society that protected its sex workers from abuse, a society that held sex-worker pride parades, a society where someone might even employ a master of the sexual arts to give their spouse of 30 years one night of ecstacy on, say, their birthday (and such an arrangement be perfectly normal), a society where someone might even be famous for their skill - even in such a society, all sex workers would either be in the profession as a result of being broken, or be broken by the profession.
That inability to even conceive of the idea that, in the absence of moral stigma, the perceived threat to monogamy and the puritanical population's presumption of universally common boundaries, prostitution could exist unhampered by disempowerment and exploitation - is quite obviously premised on the idea that no-one can treat sex as a purely physical, commercial act without psychological damage occuring or psychological scar tissue being the reason for indifference, a premise that is monstrously presumptive about other people's sexuality, and hypocritical to boot from those who express horror out the other side of their face that someone could presume everyone that's not straight is sick in the head.
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