Anthony Weiner = Chandra Levy

Remember her? Unless you were on Mars a decade ago, of course you do: The disappearance of the Congressional intern on May 1, 2001 set off a months-long media frenzy. Cable news channels led with her story every night. Hell, even the broadcast networks had her at the top of the evening news most of the time from May to September: Oooooooh, how could such a young, attractive (read: white) woman go missing in a public park? Was she sleeping with Congressman Gary Condit? OMG OMG might Condit be RESPONSIBLE FOR HER DISAPPEARANCE???

The band played on.

In the meantime, two major stories were going virtually unnoticed: First, the Bush tax cuts---you know, the ones that led to the economic disaster we find ourselves in now---were going through smoothly, with relative quiet. (Except among those freaks who didn't seem to recognize the vital immediacy of a missing white girl. Did I mention that she was attractive?)

Then there was that other thing going on in the summer of 2001. Uh, what was it again? Help me out, here. Ah...I think it had something to do with Germany and Afghanistan.....yeah...yeah, I believe so. Something about a plan to, erm, to, uh, harm us in some way. Yeah, that's it! Unfortunately, Our Glorious Free Press was so concerned with the (ultimately quite sad) case of Ms Levy that no attention was focused on news items that might have made the public question exactly who was getting the biggest tax break, and what long-term effect it could have, OR might have caused people in the government to focus more sharply on warnings they were getting from national security sources.

Ten years on, we have a Republican Party doing its damnedest to fulfill McConnell's Mandate to deny Obama a second term by pushing us toward a Depression (if we're not already in one). Hey, don't sweat it: Their friends will be just fine! As well, there's talk of us staying on in Iraq, plus whatever the smoke-and-fucking-mirrors show is being presented vis-a-vis Afghanistan.

But hey, we don't need to worry about any of that! C'mon, let's focus on Weiner's weenie, Palin's impression of LeBron James' "Decision," the new iPhone that'll be obsolete by the time you finish reading this sentence, and all the pretty colors!

You don't really need to find out/What's going on/
You don't really wanna know/Just how far it's gone/
Just leave well enough alone/Eat your dirty laundry - Don Henley, 1982

Frighteningly prophetic, huh?

Instead, let's all look at these WEINERS WEINERS WEINERS!!!

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:-)

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Dwarf.

Within a few weeks, Howard was permanently replaced by Amy Goodman.