Jon Carroll's latest

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/chronicle/archive/2004/09/23/DDGIJ7PTU31.DTL

So, the Republican candidate for senator in Oklahoma is on record as saying that he supports the death penalty for abortionists....But of course the candidate has the right to say whatever he wants to. That's why we have the First Amendment, to protect vote-sucking weasels while they propose any wacky thing they choose.

(snip)

In this spirit of openness to new ideas, in this sprit of what I suppose we must call vigorous debate, I would like to make the following proposal:

The death penalty for Republican senators.

(snip)

Ah, you say, but why? Well, their party is chiefly responsible for sending American citizens to die in a pointless war. The senators are also responsible for killing about 10,000 citizens of Iraq, some of them fetuses. They are responsible for many of the deaths in this country from malnutrition and pollution. They are responsible when seniors are required to choose between food and medicine.

Plus, if the planet dies, they're responsible for that too. (By the way, killing a planet isn't a crime either, but it probably should be.)

But, you say, so many other people are also responsible for those things. Some of them are even Democrats. Why single out one group of people? Here's why: We need to make an example of them. For instance, in our ceaseless war against terrorism, we have locked up a lot of pot smokers. Al Qaeda's plan to finance its violent acts through the sale of sinsemilla has been completely disrupted. Now we're locking up people with Arab names. Are they guilty? Who knows? But they sure are an example to others -- stop being Arabs, or we will go all Rodney King upside your head.

Is it important that Republican senators get the death penalty? Perhaps not. But it is important to sow fear and discord among the people, so they will be placid and suggestible. I am doing my duty under the Patriot Act. I call on all Republican senators to turn themselves in and surrender their votes.

His column is the only reason I still read the Chron.