Leno slamming Kerry tonight

Sheesh. Can't Hollywood discredit this scumbag once and for all?

This is the last thing we need leading up to November.

imo

please say it like it is

...but didn't want to offend anyone.

Not me! :shrug:

:7

I stopped watching him, but is there a way for DU to flood him with e-mails?

any particulars?

Really dumb and disrespectful to the rappers.

:P

practically installing Ahnuld last Fall. He had him on his show pumping him up right before the recall election.

I never will, thanks to him I am now stuck with the groper as governator. :puke:

Leno is a republican ass-kisser of a high order. Haven't watched his dumb ass for years. Wussy, wimpy Jay has to buy a hundred Harleys to make himself feel like a man.

Jay is a Bush toe sucking piece of shit.

:shrug:

The only thing that isn't written is the funniest thing on the show.

:P

:D

primary then I have to agree with him.

"who you talkin' to?" that is

between him and Bush as it stands now.

"Not only will Condoleezza Rice testify, but President Bush has also agreed to meet with the (9/11) commission. He's going to testify, but he said he wants have Dick Cheney there with him. Why does he want Cheney with him? What? Does he have a learner's permit to be president and have to have an adult with him." —Jay Leno

"They said that President Bush's war in Iraq has cost the former Spanish Prime Minister his job. So President Bush isn't losing American jobs anymore, he's branching out to other countries." —Jay Leno

"President Bush went out touting his economic record in Ohio last week. Now this is a state that lost 225,000 jobs since Bush took office. You know, if Bush wants to tout his record, he should do it somewhere where the Bush economy has actually created jobs, like India, or Thailand, or China." —Jay Leno

"John Kerry said today he wants to debate President Bush once a month. Hey good luck, if Bush couldn't make it to the National Guard once a month, he's not going to show up for this." —Jay Leno

"President Bush has unveiled his first campaign commercial, highlighting all of his accomplishes in office. That's why it's a 60-second spot." —Jay Leno

"President Bush says he has just one question for the American voters, 'Is the rich person you're working for better off now than they were four years ago?'" —Jay Leno

"Kerry is well on his way to reaching his magic number of 2,162. That's the total number of delegates he needs to win the Democratic nomination. See for President Bush it's different — his magic number is 5. That’s the number of Supreme Court judges needed to win." —Jay Leno

"Some sad news, President Bush's lapdog passed away. Gee, I didn't even know Tony Blair was sick?" —Jay Leno

"The Democrats say that President Bush doesn't have an exit strategy for Iraq. Of course he does. If things don't go well, he exits in November." —Jay Leno

"President Bush said he was 'troubled' by gay people getting married in San Francisco. He said on important issues like this the people should make the decision, not judges. Unless of course we're choosing a president, then he prefers judges." —Jay Leno

"It was reported in the paper that President Bush received a 'warm reception' from the Daytona 500 drivers. Well sure, the drivers had never met anyone who was sponsored by more oil companies than they were." —Jay Leno

"In his annual economic report to Congress President Bush said that the transfer of American jobs overseas is actually part of a positive transformation that will enrich the U.S. economy over time. So basically, losing your job to someone else can be a good thing. Of course we'll see how he feels about that in November." —Jay Leno

"Political analysts say that President Bush's re-election strategy is to try and convince Americans that he's a war president. I don't get that, do you think that'll work? I mean, don't you think that if he tries to convince the American people that we need a war president, isn't he afraid that they're going to vote for the guy that was actually in a war?" —Jay Leno

"The White House has finally found one guy that kinda remembers serving with President Bush in the National Guard. Now they just need to find someone who remembers Bush working on an economic plan. ... I think the White House spent more money looking for this guy than finding weapons of mass destruction." —Jay Leno

"The White House has now released military documents that they say prove George Bush met his requirements for the National Guard. Big deal, we've got documents that prove Al Gore won the election." —Jay Leno

"There's this huge controversy over the fact that President Bush apparently received credit for National Guard service in Alabama in '72 and '73 even though his commanding officers are saying he never reported. I think what's even more disturbing is that he received enough credits to graduate from Yale." —Jay Leno

"President Bush stopped off at a bass pro fishing store to pick up a fishing reel, some line and some rubber worms. He's going to disappear and go fishing. So he must think he's back in the National Guard." —Jay Leno

"The big story now is that President Bush is coming under attack for his service in the National Guard. The White House said, 'no no,' that they have payroll records to show that he served in the National Guard. But today, the commanding officers can't remember seeing Bush between May and October of '72. President Bush said, 'Remember me? I'm the drunk guy. Remember me?'" —Jay Leno

"On 'Meet the Press' yesterday President Bush was asked what he would do if he lost the election and Bush said, ''Phhh, you mean like last time?'" —Jay Leno

"One critic in the L.A. Times said John Kerry looks like he is thinking too much. Well this is one place President Bush has him beat." —Jay Leno

"Bush admitted that his pre-war intelligence wasn't what it should have been. We knew that when we elected him!" —Jay Leno

"A Newsweek poll said if the election were held today, John Kerry would beat Bush 49 percent to 46 percent. And today, President Bush called Newsweek magazine a threat to world peace." —Jay Leno

"President Bush said that our kids must be taught how to read. He said if his aides never learned to read, they'd never be able to tell him what's in the newspapers every day." —Jay Leno

"President Bush said that American workers will need new skills to get the new jobs in the 21st century. Some of the skills they're going to need are Spanish, Chinese, Korean, because that's where the jobs went. Who better than Bush as an example of what can happen when you take a job without any training." —Jay Leno

"Some good news for the economy. President Bush went on a month-long vacation." —Jay Leno

"The federal government announced today that the recession ended back in November of 2001. It ended two years ago! Be sure to pass that on to all your unemployed friends. So you know what that means? The past twenty months of job layoffs, corporate bankruptcies and declining stocks, those were the good times. We should have been living it up." —Jay Leno

"According to a new study, bad economic times can actually be good for you because people tend to exercise more and eat better. This is not a recession, this is the Bush Health Care Plan." —Jay Leno

"Treasury Secretary Paul O'Neal has resigned. He didn't want to resign, but there wasn't any money left in the treasury so he's got nothing to do." —Jay Leno

"The FBI has issued a new terrorist warning that al Qadea may be planning a spectacular attack intended to damage our economy. Well I have news for them, they are a little too late. This is where President Bush is smart. Two years ago he did a pre-emptive strike to make sure our economy couldn't be any worse than it is right now." —Jay Leno

"President Bush said today that it is our job to vote. That's what he called it, a job. And considering how the way economy is going, that may be the only job we have." —Jay Leno

"The Stock Market was down today. Two major businesses declared bankruptcy, consumer spending is at an all time low — in other words, Bush is back on the job." —Jay Leno

"In a speech yesterday in Milwaukee, President Bush vowed to do whatever it takes to keep the economy strong. In fact he said that if he needs to, he will take vacation for another three months." —Jay Leno

"There's now speculation in Washington that President Bush is now planning to increase the economic sanctions on Iraq. And let me tell you if they are half as tough as the economic sanctions Bush has imposed on this country, they are screwed." —Jay Leno

"President Bush is leaving the White House for a vacation. He's taking a month off. Yeah, take a break, you deserve it. But aides say that while on vacation, Bush will continue to make two or three speeches a week to make sure that the market keeps crashing." —Jay Leno

all of it.

He referred to Jane Fonda: "She's very liberal, but nice... I guess."

(I was only watching Leno, because Letterman wasn't on.)

Do you think there was any "understanding" with GE attached to that money?

Are you surprised he's bashing Kerry?

http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/tv/166959_tf131.html

The five-year agreement was said to be worth about $100 million. Leno reportedly made $17 million a year in his previous deal, although he supplements his income each year through appearances as a stand-up comedian. Letterman reportedly makes about $31 million a year.

They are as closeasthis.

I wanted to puke the night of Aaarnold's win/
There was Leno introducing him to the crowd.
What a horror. The big head Leno and the Big Head Aaarnold.

More problems for Governor-elect Arnold Schwarzenegger. California Attorney General Bill Locklear has suggested a special toll free number be set up for women to call in allegations about Arnold's past. I have a better idea — why not make it a 900 number and charge $1.99 a minute. We'll pay off that $33 billion dollars right there." —Jay Leno

"As you know Arnold is investigating himself. He will subpoena both of his hands, and if he finds any evidence of wrongdoing he is going to sue himself." —Jay Leno

"In Washington, Arnold Schwarzenegger met with Vice President Dick Cheney. So, the Terminator met the Defibrillator. The difference between Schwarzenegger and Cheney is that when Cheney grabs a chest, it's his own." —Jay Leno

Arnold Schwarzenegger will probably be the keynote speaker at the Republican National Convention, which is very smart, because after Schwarzenegger speaks, Bush's English won't sound so bad." —Jay Leno

"Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he is going to ask President Bush for help with the budget. What better way to deal with a $38 billion deficit than get advice from a guy that created a $450 billion deficit." —Jay Leno

"They had the big debates tonight, with Arnold and Cruz, and they get the questions beforehand. Even Miss America contestants don't get the questions beforehand. It's like Jeopardy for dumb people." —Jay Leno

"The election is now put off until March, but recall supporters say they are going to ask the U.S. Supreme Court to get involved. And if the U.S. Supreme Court gets involved, you know what that means — the next Governor of California: George W. Bush." —Jay Leno

"Now see, a lot of critics are saying Arnold can't get elected because he's just an ambitious guy with a famous name, who doesn't know anything about running the government. Didn't hurt George Bush." —Jay Leno

Leno is not funny and he IS a republican bitch!!!

if you didn't allow me to give a short review. democratics are incest, womanizing, bisexual, murders. that all worked to get bill clinton elected. yep that just about sum's up that show.

Johnny Carson is probably embarassed all to hell that his former show went to such an asshole. It should have gone to Dave but that's a whole 'nother story.

Jay Leno gives a great helmet !!!

... of a tawdry nature. Appropriate coming from Boba Fett.

that in the Headlines skit?

to use head to avoid pregnancy. Pretty funny.

Letterman's the man.

the Dem candidates as "clowns" a few short months ago? That David Letterman?

Would we expect anything more from this blow-hard?

out of a small orifice the size of an anus.

I stopped watching that slime long ago.

*******QUOTE*******

http://www.nypost.com/gossip/pagesix_u.htm

CANNED HAM

HOWARD Stern is accusing Jay Leno of using canned laughs. "Jay, and I'm not sure for how long now, but for a while, is using a laugh track," Stern said on his show Friday. "I know it for a fact. They have to sweeten Jay's laughs 'cause his monologue's so g-damn lame." Stern's cheesesteak-loving sidekick Artie Lang chimed in, "Some times they make the mistake of shooting from behind Jay during his monologue so you see the crowd. And he just tells a joke . . . and the audience looks like it's watching a dramatic play or something." But an NBC rep insists that what may sound like a laugh track is simply the result of the way the audience is recorded.



********UNQUOTE*******