The folks at DU are pretty funny

but the folks at Atrios are even funnier (the winner in bold)! :)

http://www.haloscan.com/comments.php?user=atrios&comment=108190733946126436


Bush knew.

Encore performance by Chimpy McFlopsweat. Right click and save.
wÒÓ? | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:52 pm | #
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Dang. I listened to a realaudio stream, so I just now saw the tie!

I wonder if he stole it from Ben or from Jerry?
Chris Walsh | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:53 pm | #
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AS I was making love to my wife, I whispered in her ear "stay the course", and she got completely turned off. The couch is not that bad a place to sleep.
lk | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:54 pm | #
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Did his opening remarks ever begin to make sense? It was so painful that I had to watch "Gilmore Girls Gone Wild" instead.
Basharov | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:54 pm | #
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My name is George Bush and I approve this message:

I am an Idiot.

Oh yeah, ignore the little man behind the curtain over there.
David (Austin Tx) | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:54 pm | #
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I couldn't stop staring at that tie. Wow! I never realized until this minute how much I love Big Brother.
fyreflye | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:55 pm | #
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My favorite part: the "response" to the question about why he and Cheney were going to testify together to the 9/11 commission. (Short version of answer: "Next question?")
Capital J | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:55 pm | #
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I've gotten to the point where I know ahead of time what topic he is going to drunkenly swerve towards next. There was one point where I thought "Oh shit...a God reference is up next." The question had nothing to do with religion, but damned if the word "Almighty" wasn't out of his mouth 10 seconds later.

I can't read Stephen King books anymore for the same reason. I think they are both bots built by NASA.
John Gillnitz | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:56 pm | #
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He babbled, he repeated himself, he talked in circles, he rambled, he repeated himself some more, they made no mistakes of any import, and he's not going to apologize over 9/11.

Osama Bin Laden was the person responsible, and so we're not going to rest until we bring...(sudden recollection that we've given up that hunt again)...people to justice.

To all of you who are not American citizens: I gotta do a Richard Clarke here. Back in 2000, people like me did everything we could, everything in our power, to keep this man from becoming President. But we failed. It wasn't enough. He became President anyway. And we apologize from the depths of our hearts.
RT | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:56 pm | #
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I guess the most telling comment was when he said the terrorists have no guilt.

I love the work that the Special Olymics is involved in............. don't you think that the person we saw should be involved in a sack race, rather than controlling the most powerful country on the planet?

If there is a god, he/she/it has forsaken us, bigtime...
Thurber Hamm | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:57 pm | #
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I think my favorite part was when he said:

"Of course they don't like being occupied. I wouldn't like being occupied either."

Unbelievable.
Hesiod | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:57 pm | #
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remember these are the same pundits that declared bush beat gore in all the debates.
esther | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:58 pm | #
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Or...

"When you act like you're hiding something, it means you've got something to hide."

Yeah, George. It does.
Hesiod | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:58 pm | #
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I keep waiting for my mom to wake me up, tell me it was all a terrible dream and send me off to Mrs. Massey's 2nd Grade Class...
the red telephone | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 10:00 pm | #
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I'm still wondering where that poison gas Turkey farm in Iraq is supposed to be.
Hesiod | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 10:00 pm | #
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I half-expected him to make a break for the window and have to be shot with a tranquilizer gun.
the red telephone | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 10:02 pm | #
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lots to choose from, but i think this exchange was my favorite part!

Wash. Post reporter: Mr. President, why are you appearing before the 9/11 Commission with Vice President Cheney?

Bush: Fuck you. Next question...

WP (persisting): Mr. President, I meant why are you appearing before the 9/11 Commission together, as opposed to separately, as the Commission requested?

Bush (glaring): Seriously, dude -- fuck you. Weren't you listening the first time? Next question...
CF | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 10:03 pm | #
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"I'm sure something will pop into my head" made me spit out my drink
reallygonecat | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 10:04 pm | #
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Fineman was on with Matthews, and, no, neither of them commented on how absolutely disgraceful this performance was.

They didn't drool over him like they did for the "Mission Accomplished" moment, but they haven't quite managed to purge the effects of the kool-aid.
Seraphiel | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 10:04 pm | #
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Not only did he say freedom is a gift from the almighty, but also that we have "BEEN CALLED" to spread it. What's his problem with a theocracy in Iraq?: he's already running one here.
op99 | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 10:04 pm | #
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That was remarkably bad, even by the meagre standards of what I'd expect from him. Granted, I'm not an objective viewer, but anyone who looks on that shambling mess of non-answers and talking points with favour had to be looking in from the parallel Universe of Lowered Expectations.

Maybe since they couldn't get him to admit to mistakes (and really, what good sociopath ever would?), they've concluded that it was a good performance.

Me, I'm just shocked that this dolt is the man determining the course of all our futures.
SteveNS | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 10:04 pm | #
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Preznit, please, feel free to rub my head for good luck. You're goona need it mutherfuker.
Brown-Skin | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 10:07 pm | #

:evilgrin:

I'm having a hard time with funny - I'm depressed.

AS I was making love to my wife, I whispered in her ear "stay the course", and she got completely turned off. The couch is not that bad a place to sleep.

My husband would be sleeping on the couch, too.

if Bush bent over and farted into the mic, freepers would praise his eloquence and penchant for speaking in terms the common man can understand.
renato | Email | Homepage | 04.13.04 - 9:55 pm | #

I watched it with my husband. When I remarked about the glowing tie, he said, "OMG, his disintegrating liver has set his tie on fire!"


Cher

is exactly what bush wanted to say. these people are funnier but it`s hard to be upbeat..oh well there is tomorrow...

I got off on this one;

"Wash. Post reporter: Mr. President, why are you appearing before the 9/11 Commission with Vice President Cheney?

Bush: Fuck you. Next question...

WP (persisting): Mr. President, I meant why are you appearing before the 9/11 Commission together, as opposed to separately, as the Commission requested?

Bush (glaring): Seriously, dude -- fuck you. Weren't you listening the first time? Next question..."

Great!!

My perception was, "Why are you and VP Cheney testifying together,"

junior: Cuz we have things to say to the commissioners.

WP (persisting) : Why does it take two of 'ya?

junior: Cuz they want to hear what we have to say!

had me laughing so much I was crying. Now, I have to watch the beginning of the speech again-I didn't even notice his tie. I was too busy yelling back at the television (and at my husband, who kept saying, "Why don't you just turn the idiot off?") Thanks for posting this!