how to learn yiddish in one simple step

I live in a small town with a very liberal reform synagogue (mostly serves as social gathering place) though i dont frequent it myself. However, since my last name is very jewish and hard to m iss if you are looking for that sort of thing i was blessed with a call from the Lubovitch in los angeles. For those who arent familiar with them, they are the black coated bearded black hat wearing creeps who are the equivalent of the fundies and are perhaps even more intolerant and obnoxious than they are.
Anyway they called to say they were going to move up to my area and would i like to join (donate)to their synagogue.
Oh i said i wish you had called two weeks earlier i would have loved to
vell and vy you cant join now?
Cause i converted to islam couple weeks ago
Learned some interesting new yiddish swear words

and am returning it in small doses since i dont own a newspaper or tv channel

...when I was working in hospitals around Boston. The were smelly but largely inoffensive. I did know some of their beliefs, though, and found them almost as weird as the Irish Catholic stuff I grew up with, which is my yardstick for religious weirdness.

Thanks for the laugh, though. I can well imagine the vocabulary, along with the three ritual spits when they hung up the phone.

Vell, I don't see it. Kind of smells to me.

How about spreading some peace and tolerance?

I agree 100%

I lived in israel for a year - i know what these people are capable of -

help the Jews. I thought it was a comedic opening line. I responded, how do you figure. He responded that with God letting Hitler kill 6 million or so Jews, that in the future the survivors and their families wouldn't convert because of the guilt.

This guy was serious. My mouth was agape. What's Yiddish for "Jesus!"