|
A staunchly Republican relative sent me the old ant and grasshopper email spiel where the industrious ant (Repug) is the victim of the lazy "welfare queen" grasshopper. I updated it a little and replied to all. Here is the 2004 version of the ant and grasshopper story. Use it as you please.
COMPLETELY UP TO DATE 2004 VERSION:
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer, trying to make ends meet by working two and sometimes three minimum wage jobs, struggling to keep a roof over his head and food on the table.
The grasshopper tries to make do on unemployment after his career dies when his lifelong job is outsourced to China. He spends his days reading the want ads and posting resumes on monster.com with no success. There is little money for food, much less beer.
Come winter, the President gives a prime time speech to announce that he is in favor of tax cuts for this richest supporters. In addition, he reports that the cost of heating fuel is likely to rise because of the rising quantities being consumed in the battle for world domination. The citizenry is expected to suck it up and support the war effort. It is the patriotic thing to do. The American Way. We must stay the course.
The ant and the grasshopper turn their thermostats down to 55 degrees and wear mittens in the house. They call the TV networks to try to pubicize their plight, but the conservative media will only report on the windfall the rich are getting with the tax cuts and how good life is when you are wealthy and contribute to the President's re-election campaign.
The oil companies (with the Vice-President's blessing) commission a conservative think tank to develop energy plan legislation that will allow them to maximize profits. It favors fossil fuels for future transportation and energy generation applications and rolls back environmental regulations. The House passes the bill at 4:00 in the morning after sufficient arms are twisted. The CEO's count their salaries and stock options. They donate $2000 from their tax windfall to the re-election fund and encourage their underlings to do the same. It is important to corporate bidness that the President stays in office.
Donald Rumsfeld announces that the military needs more money for the "war" effort. The billion dollar a week cost of the Iraq occupation does not fit within the $400 billion+ "defense budget. Those funds are earmarked for the defense contractors who strongly support the President and contribute to his campaign, even though they build unneeded weapons. More must be allocated to pay the contractors for outsourced services from the no-bid, cost-plus sweetheart contracts. There is no money in the Treasury to allocate for the war, so it will have to be borrowed and added to the deficit. "It's only money," says Rummy. "We're talking about freedom and democracy for Iraq. Get your priorities in line here. Don't you support the troops?"
The debt will be paid by future generations of ants and grasshoppers. With interest.
Newt Gingrich calls for a new "Contract for America." There are flags everwhere. Only war supporters can be real Americans! What America really needs is another tax cut. Gays are the spawn of Satan. The ant and grasshopper are ignored when they ask what is in it for them. They are arrested when they try to protest. The Patriot Act, you know.
Tom DeLay introduces legislation to eliminate unemployment benefits. "Get a job, slackers"
is his slogan. Corporate lobbyists applaud and give DeLay piles of money for his support. The grasshopper is just about out of unemployment, and there are no jobs to be had. He is living on Ramen noodles already, trying to survive the job loss. The administration says the economy is "robust". The media parrot the day's talking points. Especially Fox News.
The ant gets very sick from working 18 hours a day, but has no health insurance. The premiums would eat up half of his earnings, if he qualified. The clinic wants cash before treatment. The ant digs into his meager savings, bites the bullet, and starts looking for another part-time job to cover the loss. In his dreams he lives in Canada, where everyone gets health care.
The President appears on TV again. His speech makes no sense. He looks like he is coming off a three day bender. He talks about fear, and danger, and staying the course. He hints that Saddam and Osama are second cousins. He looks under the podium for WMD's. He is confident that he could never make a mistake, or trust a con man, or stretch the truth. Even a little. He goes off to Crawford for a much needed vacation.
The ant and grasshopper soldier on. The ant works all of the time and his health becomes perilous. It becomes nearly impossible to stay awake all of those hours, much less work. His supervisor cracks the whip. Corporate says productivity is the gospel, and if he can't cut it he can be replaced. The grasshopper can't find a civilian job that will support his family. Luckily he is still young enough to join the army. He soon finds himself in Iraq, with an M16 and no body armor. It's 115 in the shade. The troops don't understand why we are there.
It's election year in America and the ant and grasshopper have a choice - stay the course or regime change for a better America. They know what "four more years" will bring. They understand the consequence and importance of their vote.
They vote Democrat. Kerry wins in a landslide.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Learn from your mistakes.
|
Printer-friendly format
Email this thread to a friend
Bookmark this thread
(344 posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
