The Putin-Iraq Connection: Is This How It Went Down?

It's just months after the horrible attacks of September 11. The head of the KGB walks into the Kremlin. "President Putin, we just received word that Saddam Hussein has determined to strike at the Americans. He says he wants a little of what they're cooking in Afghanistan!"

Putin looks at the massive amount of evidence. "Why, this is quite credible evidence that Saddam Hussein plans to attack America! We must inform their glorious leader, President George W. Bush at once! Get me the red phone!"

MEANWHILE...

AT THE WHITE HOUSE...

A troubled George W. Bush puzzles over the papers scattered on his desk. He is interrupted by a sudden knock on the Oval Office door.

"Mister President!" Andy Card pants. "I have Vladamir Putin on the red phone for you."

Bush looks up with a mild glint of irritation. "You broke my concentration just as I had solved the trade deficit problem and came up with a peace plan that will satisfy both the Israelis and Palestinians. Now it's gone."

"Very sorry, Mister President. I'm sure your courageous and brave mind will figure it out again."

"Quite right. Patch the head of Russia onto speaker-phone."

The door closes behind Card and soon Putin is on the phone.

"Pootie-Poot! It's me, Dubya. I understand you'd like to speak with me?"

"Yes, heroic and steadfast American leader! We have highly credible evidence that Saddam has been plotting attacks against America!"

"NO!" gasped Bush. "I cannot believe it."

"I am sorry, Oh Resolute One. But it is the truth."

"I'll talk to my people about it. This troubles me greatly, because I sure don't want any more war or death or destruction! Tell you what, Pootie-Poot, I don't want you telling or showing anyone this credible evidence against Saddam, because that would likely make everyone want a regime change in Iraq. But we must be contemplative about this, and not hasty. Even if I do decide to go to war against Iraq, you keep this information under your hat. In fact, if I decide to go to war against Saddam, I think it would be a good idea for you to oppose the war! Yeah, that way, no one will know about all this bombshell credible evidence! Yeah, and then you should wait until after months and months have gone by indicating that Saddam wasn't a threat! THEN you can reveal this information, but not before! Got it?"

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This obviously is exactly what happened, if we are to believe the recent revelations in the media.

... suggests that Bush had papers scattered across his desk....

Bush is a clean desk CEO. No clutter on his desk or in his mind.

Tabla rasa.

Seriously?

Bush isn't that sort of guy. He has other people to read for him. He's a "big picture" guy, like Reagan. He doesn't read--he delegates. That's one principal reason why he's in so much trouble right now. *g*

Thank you for the explanation.

Makes sense to me.
nonsense - but sense nonetheless.

"Oh Resolute One" ??? funny!

I'm glad you recognised his courage and heroism in the narrative.

And I dug up this article from my files to show how cleverly Putin disguised his position:

Friday March 21, 1:07 AM
Russia's Putin turns on U.S.

MOSCOW (Reuters) - Russian President Vladimir Putin, in fierce criticism of the U.S. attack on Baghdad, has demanded a quick end to hostilities and is challenging Washington's view that Iraq is a threat to world security.

http://sg.news.yahoo.com/030320/3/397cw.html

We are not with you and we don't believe you

Patrick Wintour in Moscow
Wednesday April 30, 2003
The Guardian

Almost mocking Mr Blair, he went on: "Where is Saddam? Where are those arsenals of weapons of mass destruction, if indeed they ever existed? Perhaps Saddam is still hiding somewhere in a bunker underground, sitting on cases of weapons of mass destruction and is preparing to blow the whole thing up and bring down the lives of thousands of Iraqi people."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/russia/article/0,2763,946322,00.html

Yahoo!: Error 404
The requested URL could not be found.

-------------

Is this the article with the broken link?

Putin Turns on US Over War in Iraq
Reuters
March 20, 2003

Russian President Vladimir Putin, in some of the harshest words by a world leader so far over the U.S. attack on Iraq on Thursday, said the war was unjustified and must end quickly. Russia had joined France, Germany and China in demanding that United Nations arms inspectors continue their search for banned weapons in Iraq before the countries would back any hostilities.

"This military action is unjustified...there has been no answer to the main question which is: are there weapons of mass destruction in Iraq and, if so, which ones," a grim-faced Putin told Russia's top ministers in the Kremlin.

"Military action...is a big political error,"he said in nationally-televised remarks, adding it flouted world opinion and international law. Iraq has denied having weapons of mass destruction.

>snip<
But the crisis over Iraq, with which Russia has long had close economic ties, appears to have tested the new-found warmth between Moscow and its former Cold War foe. "Iraq has presented no danger, neither for neighbouring countries nor for any region in the world," Putin declared, in a flat contradiction of Washington's view. In fact, he said, there had been signs that Iraq had begun to cooperate far more with the U.N. arms inspectors.
http://www.globalpolicy.org/security/issues/iraq/attack/statement/2003/0320putinturns.htm

Your March 20 article appears to be a shorter version of the March 21 article, which also quotes the Russian foreign minister. Here's the key sentence from your article that proves Putin is or was a liar.

"Iraq has presented no danger, neither for neighbouring countries nor for any region in the world," Putin declared, in a flat contradiction of Washington's view.

If Putin did warn bush* that Saddam was going to attack -- then why did Russia not support the Iraq invasion?

We heard alot about France/Germany's lack of support.

so where are the russian troops in Iraq? where is the russian aid to help with the invasion and occupation?

there's been enough news reports regarding Chechnya rebels being aided by "terrorist organizations", so if there is a Bin-Laden / Saddam cnnection - wouldn't Russia also be in jeopardy from a Saddam backed attack?

http://www.abc.net.au/news/newsitems/200312/s1013128.htm

"We do not want the United States to lose their war on terrorism - we are US partners in the fight against terrorism," Mr Putin said.

"But as for Iraq, this is a separate matter. There were no international terrorists under Hussein. This is a separate problem," he said.

Maybe the Russians really did pull a fast one on bushco. Could be the ultimate revenge for what we did to them by proxy in Afghanistan.

I can envision Putin quietly putting the Saddam will attack bug in bush's ear. A few hints here and there just to confirm what chimpy already wanted to do. Meanwhile Putin plays it smart in the run up to our invasion of Iraq earning kudos for his country among Arabs and others.


http://www.greenmac.com/World_Events/putinwin.html