Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login
Google

If you had to be a cellmate with Bush or Cheney, which would you pick?

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread		 This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » Archives » General Discussion (Through 2005) Donate to DU
 
Cyrano Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:02 PM
Original message
If you had to be a cellmate with Bush or Cheney, which would you pick?
I personally would try to hang myself with a sheet or shoelace.

Yeah, it's a strange question, but which one would you rather be forced to spend time with, pure moron or pure evil?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
hippiegranny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:03 PM
Response to Original message
1. i'd pick the rope
to hang myself with.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
mom cat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:07 PM
Response to Reply #1
13. I'd pick the rope...to hang either one.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
LittleApple81 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:04 PM
Response to Original message
2. Moron. n/t
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Nite Owl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:04 PM
Response to Original message
3. I'd be sure to do something
that put me in solitary confinement real quick.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Walt Starr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:04 PM
Original message
I'd pick Cheney
because his heart is about to give out.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Guy Whitey Corngood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:04 PM
Response to Original message
4. The one with the purtiest mouth.
:puke: Just kidding. I must go and purge myself now.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
buycitgo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:08 PM
Response to Reply #4
14. I LOVE threads like these
never can come up with anything funny enough, though

btw, I sure love OReilly's literary oeuvre, don't you?

and have you heard him READ that garbage?

I'm going to the library to see if they have it on tape

it is without DOUBT the WORST reading I've ever heard

he sounds like a funeral director, reading the phone book

they played in on AAR for awhile
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Guy Whitey Corngood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:11 PM
Response to Reply #14
15. Are you kidding?
If I had a radio show I'd start it every day with a different excerpt. That book on tape is the gift that keeps on giving.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
buycitgo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:24 PM
Response to Reply #15
32. harharharharharhar
what am I thinking?

calling liberry as soon as I finish this

there
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
demnan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:06 PM
Response to Original message
5. I'd pick Bush
the way he butchers the language would cause mild amusement in the long hours. However, on the other hand, the satisfaction of seeing Cheney in jail would be very rewarding too.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Itchinjim Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:06 PM
Response to Original message
6. I'd make Bush my bitch,
and pass him around the cell block.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
aden_nak Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:06 PM
Response to Original message
7. I'd pick Bush.
He's just stupid enough to manipulate. Cheney, on the other hand, would be likely to attempt to stick a shiv in my throat as I sleep.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DrWeird Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:06 PM
Response to Original message
8. Bush. He's easily coerced into doing things.
So I figure he'd be like Multiple Migs, and then I'd have the cell to myself.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Cyrano Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:07 PM
Response to Reply #8
11. Hannibal Lector would approve
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Robin Hood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:07 PM
Response to Original message
9. Fuck hanging yourself.
After I had my way with that little wimp George. I would take out his wussy ass with a good beating.

After all, The hell that he reigned down on the Iraqi people and the U.S. military, the punishment that I would give him would still not be enough.

Come to papa, Little Texas bitch.

Mwahahahahahaha!!!!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
merh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:29 PM
Response to Reply #9
34. Could always pimp him out for zozos from the canteen! n/t
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
rkc3 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:07 PM
Response to Original message
10. I's like having two handfuls of shit.
One from a horse and the other from a cow (or with corn vs. peanuts, etc.) and not a situation you'd want to be in.

I'd probably pick Bush. I'm pretty sure he'd be able to get good weed/coke and possibly conjugal visits arranged for his buddies.

Although Cheney might be a good guy to have in your corner if another inmate came at you with a shiv. His sneer alone might scare some aggressors away.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
earthside Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:07 PM
Response to Original message
12. Cheney
My microwave and I would want to be a cellmate with Cheney.

My bag of pretzels and I would pick George.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Dastard Stepchild Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:12 PM
Response to Reply #12
16. Cheney
The stress of being around all those incarcerated folks would likley set heart attack number 872 in motion. Then I would have the cell all to myself.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DinahMoeHum Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:15 PM
Response to Original message
17. Don't care. Either one can be my bitch. . .
and do it to each other, on my command.

:evilgrin:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
progressivebydesign Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:18 PM
Response to Original message
18. Cheney.
He doesn't appear to be mentally ill, and he seems like he'd have a great, dry sense of humor. He's also tougher.. so we could get some extra stuff from the other inmates he bullies, and the guards he cuts deals with.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
GiovanniC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:19 PM
Response to Original message
19. First Day
I'd tell the guard, "See that short dumb guy with the beady eyes? He said, no way you're man enough to put a hood over his head, put electrodes on his genitals, and then sic an unmuzzled dog on him. Are you gonna take that from him? I didn't think so."
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
LunaC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:20 PM
Response to Original message
20. Cheney is sullen and therefore quieter
The incessant, incoherent, inarticulate babblings of Bush* would drive me nuts. Stupidity has a way of pissing me off in a big way.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
wryter2000 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:21 PM
Response to Original message
21. Cheney
He doesn't talk as much.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Q3JR4 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:22 PM
Response to Original message
22. Bush.
I'd break him and then pass him around--like the whore he is--to everyone who would want a piece for perks from the inmates.

If it was the Texas prison system I would be in a state of perpetual joy knowing that the people in it he'd been able to screw for so long were finally getting even.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
lectrobyte Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:29 PM
Response to Original message
23. Hmmm. Wich testicle you'd like pounded flat with a 10 lb sledge might
be an easier question, but I'll take a swing at this one:

But I'd have to pick Cheney. At least you could probably hold a conversation with him. That rambling catch-phrase buzzword sentence-fragment mode of *'s would get old quick.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Cat Atomic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:34 PM
Response to Original message
24. Cheney. I'd never stop laughing.
I'd just look at him in his jumpsuit and be overcome with joy and irony. I don't think that'd ever wear off.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Zynx Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:35 PM
Response to Original message
25. Bush
I could train him to do stupid pet tricks.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
flordehinojos Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:56 PM
Response to Original message
26. It is an AVOID-AVOID proposition. Like you I would choose neither!
:headbang:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
AngryLizard Donating Member (488 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 12:58 PM
Response to Reply #26
27. Yeah, seriously. Death should REALLY be an option here.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
kaitykaity Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:00 PM
Response to Original message
28. Cheney

I could have an intelligent conversation with the man,
so at least I wouldn't be bored.

Besides, I want to know the inside jokes that the puppet
masters tell about their front man.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Cyrano Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:21 PM
Response to Reply #28
29. Careful, kaitykaity. Sitting down and having a discussion with evil
makes you vulnerable to being drawn in. Next thing you know, you'll be talking out of the side of your mouth and and telling everyone to "go Cheney themselves."
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:22 PM
Response to Original message
30. Laura Bush
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
in_cog_ni_to Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:23 PM
Response to Original message
31. Share the sheet or shoelace?
I'd kill myself first.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
skypilot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:25 PM
Response to Original message
33. I'd pick Bush.
I think that at heart he's a wuss. I could probably beat the crap out of him. Cheney might very well sneer me to death. :scared:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
johnnie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:35 PM
Response to Original message
35. Bush for sure
Cheney would keel over too fast, that wouldn't be fun. I would love to give the shrub some of his own medicine. Give him some of those finger flicks in the back of the head, a few wedgies...you know, those child-like things that he would hate to have done to him.
He would be so fun to piss off, because you know he would lose it. Then when he comes after me, I would just keep tripping him.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
obnoxiousdrunk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:35 PM
Response to Original message
36. Bush
I would turn him into Liberal.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
MichiganVote Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:36 PM
Response to Original message
37. Either one. I'd enjoy torturing them both. One would be pure sport
and I wouldn't have to say anything other than that I was poor, down and out, just not one of the "in" crowd. Too bad he's have to spend time with me.

The other(Cheney)would probably benefit from my tendency never to give in and manipulate the crap out of him.(Hey, I had 11 siblings, compromise? what's that?)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:36 PM
Response to Original message
38. I'd pick Cheney
and sneak up behind him and yell "BOO!" every chance I got.

Really, either one would be great because I'd be at them 24/7 telling them exactly what I thought of them and their policies. Oh, and I'd spread the rumor that whichever one I was with was a child molester. From what I understand, child molesters don't fare well in prison. ;)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
KansDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:39 PM
Response to Original message
39. If you pick Cheney, you'll get Cheney. If you pick Bush...
...you'll get him and Cheney too. Remember, Bush doesn't go into small rooms with locked doors by himself!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
genius Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:52 PM
Response to Original message
40. How easy would it be to scare Cheney into a heart attack?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
obnoxiousdrunk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 01:53 PM
Response to Original message
41. I'd pick
Bush and turn him into a Liberal.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-04-04 02:03 PM
Response to Original message
42. whoops
Edited on Wed Aug-04-04 02:06 PM by skygazer
that's how duplicates happen!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view this author's profile Click to add this author to your buddy list Click to add this author to your Ignore list Wed May 01st 2024, 03:46 AM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]
 Top

Home » Discuss » Archives » General Discussion (Through 2005) Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators

Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC