Swift Buck Apo$tles for Truth about Jesus

we seven apostles knew jesus. we served with jesus, and we know first hand that he did not EARN his reward in paradise at the right hand of god, and he just happened to be crucified by accident which he then used to his political advantage.

we happen to know that the many miracles that jesus performed were just cheap tricks to further his ambitious career. there were really only 5 loaves and 5 fishes and his press team blew this miracle all out of proportion.

and when he raised lazurus from the dead, just another cheap publicity stunt to guarantee his place in theocratic history. and the whole crucifixion thing, that's all blown way out of proportion too. sure, he suffered a bit, but he certainly didn't suffer for us on the conservative side of things. and he used it for all it's worth to energize his base supporters.

and when jesus threw the money changers out of the temple, that was just a big show for the reporters and fans. he took money every sunday and used it to buy wine. and jesus may have hung around the poor and afflicted and oppressed but he associated himself with quite a few wealthy individuals too, and paid NO taxes.

so remember, jesus does not deserve to lead us. he is not qualified to be the messiah because he is an elitist and cultist. we should know, we apostled with jesus way back when, and we think the american people should know about this phony baloney christ.

Mopaul, that is extremely clever.

Been nice knowing ya, mopaul. ;)