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Edited on Fri Nov-05-04 01:07 PM by kgfnally
I'm going back into the closet, I think. After trying- desperately- to get respect and dignity from my fellow man for over a decade, I'm starting to think most people really don't want me alive OR to be who I am.
I'm so totally torn up. Since WHEN does being right or doing the right thing get me squat, now OR later? It doesn't. It never, ever has. People look at me funny when I do something good for someone else without getting anything in return. People tell me I'm wasting my time.
I had some hope last night when I remembered that the Pubs own the problems now, that they HAVE to throw a bone to their religious base "or lose them".... but that's not going to be the case. I'm a hated man now, just because I'm easy to hate.
I guess everyone I grew up around was right: I really *am* a pathetic faggot ass limp-wristed child-fucking homo pervert. I don't have any choice but to accept that label now.
I truly, truly wish I had never been born. People like me really ARE the scum of the earth...... I guess.....
Sorry, but I don't have any hope left. Everything I've ever hoped for (yes, also before this election, before *, even, before I became an adult and so briefly had dreams for my future).... it's all ashes now.
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