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Dr Ron Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-24-04 03:41 PM
Original message
CANADA BUSY SENDING BACK BUSH-DODGERS
(This is making the rounds on the internets, with conservatives particularly liking this. I thought it is worth posting as it is funny. As liberals we can show a sense of humor, as opposed to all the hatred we are more often seeing from the right):


CANADA BUSY SENDING BACK BUSH-DODGERS

by Joe Blundo The Columbus Dispatch 11/16/04

The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The re-election of President Bush is prompting the exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray and agree with Bill O'Reilly.

Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, animal-rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at night. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota.

The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"

In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences,but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he said. "The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn't give milk."

Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them cross the border and leave them to fend for themselves. "A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though."

When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about the Bush administration establishing re-education camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR.

In the days since the election, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs,Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age," an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies. "I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many art-history majors does one country need?"

In an effort to ease tensions between the United States and Canada, Vice President Dick Cheney met with the Canadian ambassador and pledged that the administration would take steps to reassure liberals, a source close to Cheney said. "We're going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts. And we might put some endangered species on postage stamps. The president is determined to reach out."

----------------
If you need to balance this with some jokes at Bush's expense, check out the Unofficial Kerry for President Blog, which has this, but far more stuff making fun of Bush, as well as more seroius content.

http://kerryblog.blogspot.com
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stlchic Donating Member (272 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-24-04 03:44 PM
Response to Original message
1. Careful....
Edited on Wed Nov-24-04 03:48 PM by stlchic
Somebody originally posted this in GD, and got flamed for it big time. The thread was moved over to the Lounge if you're interested.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=2076487&mesg_id=2076487

(I personally thought it was funny, but a lot of people, to my confusion, were offended.)

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MichiganVote Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-24-04 03:52 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. I liked it and I thought it was clever. I can laugh at myself.
I can even laugh with others who laugh at me. So what? There is nothing offensive about this piece. It is tongue in cheek humor. Plenty of it around on conservatives too.

To those offended I say, Get a grip...and quit being a curmuddgeon
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jackelope72 Donating Member (726 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-24-04 03:52 PM
Response to Original message
2. Myron Floren
He was the accordion player on Lawrence Welk. Just in case any of my Liberal Bush-Dodger compadres needs the info.
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Walt Starr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-24-04 03:57 PM
Response to Original message
4. Not this shit again
:eyes:

Shit like this belongs in the Lounge!
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Moderator DU Moderator Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Nov-24-04 04:00 PM
Response to Original message
5. duplicate thread .... please discuss here
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