OMG.The latest diet is the Jesus Diet!

saracat

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:34 AM
Original message

OMG.The latest diet is the Jesus Diet!

No joke. This is scary. What would Jesus Eat? And it is a best seller!We are officially nuts

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judaspriestess

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:34 AM
Response to Original message

1. is this the same as the hallelujah diet? n/t

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jean

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:35 AM
Response to Original message

2. send it to Falwell asap - he fills the full screen width on most tv's

Edited on Tue Nov-30-04 12:39 AM by jean

edit - spellck

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jdj

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:35 AM
Response to Original message

3. They'll shit their pants to know Jesus was an Essene, aka vegetarian.

this diet will last about 2 minutes.

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Winamericaback

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:36 AM
Response to Original message

4. Hmm

Nail yourself to a cross so you have no access to food?

Okay sorry POOR taste but I had too.. :)

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luxpara

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Tue Nov-30-04 01:10 AM
Response to Reply #4

18. well, not NO food...

he did bite his nails.

Get off the cross, the wood is needed!!!

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htuttle

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:37 AM
Response to Original message

5. Haven't Seventh Day Adventists been doing that for years?

Or the Essenes and such? I'm thinking of that Essene 'living bread' you can get with the live bean sprouts in it.

I'd bet that Jesus never had a thick steak and potatoes...

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gaia_gardener

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:58 AM
Response to Reply #5

13. I thought Essenes were the ones

that didn't eat anything that had to be killed - not even vegetables if the plant had to die to give them the food. They're basically "fruitarians" in that they only eat things that fall off the plants or are harvested after the plant dies (like grain).

I just know that years ago when I was waitressing I had a patron give me a huge bag of Essene materials. I was going through an information gathering stage so I read all that he gave me and thought it was cool, but not for me.

I would assume to be an Essene in the manner the info I had indicated, you would have to be very good at preserving food.

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htuttle

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Tue Nov-30-04 01:04 AM
Response to Reply #13

15. That's a good question

I was thinking of this bread:
http://www.sproutpeople.com/cookery/essene.html
http://breadnet.net/essene.html

It's made of wheat berries or wheat sprouts.

I knew a fruitarian once. Used to drive around with a big grocery bag of fruit in the front seat of his taxicab. He used to fart a lot, too. I always figured it was from eating all the fruit.

:shrug:

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gaia_gardener

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Tue Nov-30-04 01:12 AM
Response to Reply #15

19. Fiber does make you extremely gassy

You're supposed to eventually get used to it, but I don't think everyone does.

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charliebrown

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:37 AM
Response to Original message

6. LOL...What would Jesus eat.

We know he had a hankering for fish and Wine!!! :evilgrin:

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Sugarbleus

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:42 AM
Response to Reply #6

8. LOL........too funny

WHAT NEXTTTTTTTTTTT!? Jesus is getting to be quite the cottage industry isn't he. LOL

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DemBones DemBones

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:41 AM
Response to Original message

7. "Biblical" diets have been around for years,

though I never heard one called the "Jesus diet" before. It's like all the other "eat like your ancestors" diets but holier. ;-)

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merh

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:44 AM
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9. What, fasting for 40 days and 40 nights?

I don't think my private physician would approve! :shrug:

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brainshrub

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:52 AM
Response to Original message

10. That might be good. Diet directly affects your world-view.

I am convinced that one of the reasons that Americans will vote against their own best-interests is because they eat lots of processed foods. If you eat processed garbage, you tend to accept the processed garbage feed you in the corporate media.

As an anecdotal example: Do you know any conservative vegetarians?

Eating like Jesus might just be the trick.

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saracat

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:55 AM
Response to Reply #10

11. Or maybe its in the food! They aren't drinking the cool aid.

They are eating the Jesus food! BWAHHHHHHHH! Run for your lives!

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brainshrub

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Tue Nov-30-04 01:05 AM
Response to Reply #11

16. My observations are that fundies eat mostly crap.

Edited on Tue Nov-30-04 01:05 AM by brainshrub

Perhaps that's why they accept crap theology? :shrug:

I'm not saying eating crap makes you more prone to fundamentalism, but think about it. Every time I've gone to a fundy church, everyone their is pretty overweight.

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Swamp Rat

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:58 AM
Response to Original message

12. What, nothing but crackers and wine?

Swamp Rats CANNOT live without cheese! We're doomed!

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gaia_gardener

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Tue Nov-30-04 12:59 AM
Response to Original message

14. So does this mean it's time

for me to write "what would jesus grow" about organic gardening. Or does this mean I've missed the boat?

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gauguin57

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Tue Nov-30-04 01:06 AM
Response to Original message

17. Aw crimoney ... I had a book with a Jesus-type diet back in the '70s!

Back when I was a high-school, cult-programmed Jesus freak, I made my weekly trip to my Christian bookstore, and, instead of buying my usual inspirational paperback or Christian Archie comic book, I bought a book filled with Bible verses, diet prayers and Christian-oriented sayings I, as the reader, was supposed to put all over my refrigerator to keep me away from foodstuffs.

Lot of "my body is a temple of the Holy Spirit" sort of stuff.

This is nothing new, people.

If I thought I could really pray my chubby ass away, I'd be on my knees all day long.

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Liberaltarian

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Tue Nov-30-04 01:22 AM
Response to Reply #17

20. i think that the concept here is a little different...

kind of like the 'caveman' diet- where you eat only the type of food that humans would naturally eat,
the 'jesus' diet is more like "what would jesus have actually eaten", rather than just trying to take a 'christian perspective' on diet.

I would like to see an classical greek philosopher diet- those guys lived into their 90's, which was quite a feat for the times...i'd imagine it contains a lot of fish, olives, olive oil, grapes, etc.-
which i could get used to-
it's all that ass-fucking that i'd have trouble with.

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proudbluestater

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Tue Nov-30-04 02:11 AM
Response to Original message

21. I'm trying so hard not to laugh at the thought

Jesus Diet? Do you ever get the feeling Jesus probably spends a significant amount of time up in heaven, just rolling his eyes? :crazy:

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