To learn about the effects of fundamentalist on its adherents,

read this book:

Leaving the Fold by Marlene Winell. It will tell you what life is like in a fundy-controlled environment...and how difficult it is for those who find their way out.

It's an important read and will tell you what is on the mind of most fundies.

I have parents who are fundies. I am not as dependent on them as you were, but it is still a chore to even speak with them.

I've removed myself from the situation. Someone said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome. I kept trying to have a relationship with my mother and brother and it just didn't work. I'm trying something new now. I am very, very sorry this had to happen. In fact, I do miss my mother and brother, but the cost of the relationship was too high.

Part of me wants to call my mother and say, "Let's try it again." But if it hasn't worked in 37 years, it's doubtful it will work now. I've spent over half of my life trying to bridge the gap as it grew wider and wider. My opinions and my very state of being have changed drastically since I graduated from high school. During the entire time I lived with them, my family denigrated and hated "liberals." When I even mildly started disagreeing, they would call me a "liberal" in order to get me to comply. I always thought of the word as negative until the past two years. Sigh.

Watch what you say
Or they'll be calling you a radical,
A liberal, a fanatical criminal.
Now won't you sign up your name?
We'd like to feel you're acceptable,
Dependable, a vegetable.

-"The Logical Song" by Super Tramp

I doubt their opinion of liberals has changed since I realized I was one.

...it helped me understand exactly what happened to me and why I have a difficult time functioning in the real world. I am still working on the hard stuff, which is even harder when you add serious medical conditions.

H20 Man wrote me a nice PM in which he rightly explained that physical pain affects the neuro-transmitters in the brain, causing depression. I already had serious depression to begin with, so well...

hope you're doing better :pals: