Let's try to be bigger people...

The Smaller Self is the one that derails us - in relationships,
business, and just day-to-day living. The Smaller Self wears the sign
on her back that says, "It's All About Me." There's not enough time
for all the things we need to do that feed our ego and the illusion of
control, and we feel scarcity everywhere. This triggers selfishness
and self-centeredness, as the scarcity makes us feel like we're
constantly fighting a battle. Instead of gratitude, we complain, find
fault and make excuses.

All of us have this Smaller Self inside us. How we evolve is by
recognizing when the Smaller Self is taking charge, and then
consciously shifting to our Bigger Self. A tremendous sense of relief
comes with the realization that it's not all about us after all, that
we're just a small piece of a huge tapestry. The organizational
challenges of work, or say, getting ready for the holidays, fall back
into perspective. Discussing with your executive or life coach what
triggers the appearance of your Smaller Self is a great platform from
which to create change.

How can we consciously effect this shift? The holiday season
presents wonderful opportunities to practice. Most of us will
socialize more during the holiday season. This means we get many,
many people with whom to practice! Think about it - friends and
family at parties or on phone calls, business associates who may be
trying to get our attention when we want to be relaxing, or those who
are relaxing when we feel they ought to give us their attention;
people we want to be with or connect with, who may or may not meet our
expectations; people in a rush doing their shopping or dashing to the
post office; people with expectations about gifts, cards, time, tips
or invitations. What a rich smorgasbord with which to work on your
evolution!

Here are ten practical steps to be your Bigger Self, more often:

1. Be an observer of yourself - pay attention to what part of you
shows up, when.
2. Imagine someone you admire handling a situation. Do it that way.
3. If you were to watch yourself on videotape tomorrow, with all of
your friends, family and colleagues there to watch as well, how would
that shape your behavior today during the filming?
4. Can you be grateful for the interactions you have, even the
difficult ones? Can you go to a place of "what can I learn from this"
instead of "this stinks for me?"
5. How genuine can you be, the ultimate mastery of the art of
balancing your Bigger Self with your own personal needs and desires?
6. Can you be honest about Small Self stuff with your coach, and be
ready to act in different ways?
7. How is your sense of peace? Are you agitated and stressed vs.
happy, grateful and eager to participate? Make a conscious choice.
8. When you have conversation, can you share about yourself and
truly care and be interested in the other person?
9. Can you find interest and accomplishment with who you are and who
you are becoming this holiday season, vs. what you are doing, and how
much you are doing?
10. Can you shift from how much you "have to get done" to enjoying
how much you want to do and get to do?

One of life's greatest ironies is when having the chance to do
wonderful things - like spending social time with friends or family,
being wanted and needed by a friend, colleague or a life partner,
going to a dog show or a company party, working on a high profile
project for work, shopping for and wrapping holiday gifts or sending
cards to people we want to know we care - becomes a source of angst
instead of joy. That's Small Self stuff all wrapped up with a bow!
When that happens, I hope you'll see red flags and hear sirens
everywhere, which will remind you that you have a choice - that of
your Bigger Self. Choose that joy! And have a peaceful, joyful
holiday season, and success on all levels in the coming year. I
appreciate all of you!

Have a great New Year DU!!!!

I do not have the luxury of playing these sorts of games.

What?

And if I'm selfish, I don't give a fuck...I like myself just the way I am! I like freedom to be selfish and have everything all about me when I wanna, if I wanna. Sorry...

Because I really like cookies.

as in:
"AAARRRGGGHHHH. I don't know what I'm doin'."

the Freeper board, since they largely seem to be afflicted with Me-Itis. Most of the posters I meet on DU have already taken all this to heart, long ago.

And I have a feeling that they did it without feeling so insecure that they needed advice from an "executive or life coach". :crazy:

Sorry, but I am very suspect of anything that recommends a "life coach" over, oh, say, a trusted FRIEND.

but it came off sorta preachy, or teachy, or whatever. I'm guilty of this same kind of posting. My arrogance knows no bounds when I'm sure my ideas are not only powerful, but crystal clear, too, and everybody should just listen up and fall in line. So I empathize with you as you get all these less-than-enthusiastic responses.
:hi:

I don't understand... I responded to your posts, not the replies. So what do you mean?

were not interested in the message, but in their replies. I was not preaching to the DU but remindiding them that it is our mission. We stand for the higher ground. This was just a reminder to not be angry when opening the champagne, or lighting the cigars, because the lighter or bottle doesn't cooperate. Democrats are here to stand for all, not to preach, but to represent the majority of Americans. We should stop being angry over small things that we are already aware of and take action on the things we can.

were not interested in the message, but in their replies. I was not preaching to the DU but remindiding them that it is our mission. We stand for the higher ground. This was just a reminder to not be angry when opening the champagne, or lighting the cigars, because the lighter or bottle doesn't cooperate. Democrats are here to stand for all, not to preach, but to represent the majority of Americans. We should stop being angry over small things that we are already aware of and take action on the things we can.

You might find a more receptive audience, and gain much more valuable feedback if you post this in a different forum such as the Meeting Room, or one of the spirituality groups.

Thank you for making an effort. As a long-time student of Eastern philosophies, your opening statements about the "Smaller Self" reminded me of the the small-'a' atman and the Big 'A' Atman in Hindu teachings.

And perhaps more to the point, the teachings about attachment and ego in Buddhism.

Best wishes,
sw

these days. I'd love to live your philosophy. I know I'd be a better person. But I also, desperately, want better leadership for our country. And I don't believe we're going to succeed against an incredibly efficient, well-oiled machine like the Republican Party unless we become warriors and enter the battle. We're up against Swiftboat Veterans paid to lie to the national media by Texas oilmen. W'ere up against the PNAC who now work out of the Bush administration. We're up against an anti-environmental Congress and President. We're up against a ruthless leader who believes God talks to him. We're up against a fundamentalist American Taliban that counts the President as a supporter. And we're up against hate-radio, which parrots the Bush administration talking points every day.
So....my smaller self is at war with my bigger self.

everyone is thinking so much about what we are up against, that we are forgetting what we should be greatful for. Yes, we should be angry, but we shouldn't lose site of the gifts in our lives either.

Does the concept of lead by example come to mind? Perhaps moron* should read this.

we should just be renamed the US of Stepford. We are free thinkers and are still afforded that right in our Constitution. Please don't forgo that right out of anger, the "do as I do" mentality will not help us progress into the future.

so often I get bogged down in my small self, my little ego voice that wants to be noticed and loved and is petty and jealous.

Your message is a good one.

i've learned to take what i can use, and leave the rest. your message is very timely since there is so much frustration and anger out here about the last selection. :hi: thanks.

I'll have to scale it back a little. ;)

Thanks for the good thoughts, :toast: and merry new year :party: !

but I'll assume you meant the best and perhaps femininity is a bit powerful when excercised. Perhaps you just wanted to show off your image, either way, thank you for your comments.

I like your interpretation of the image, although the intention wasn't as profound.

Just wanted to show my approval with a little levity. My apologies if I offended you. Like I said, thanks for the good thoughts.

:hug:

edit: spelling

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=104x2881056

Fuck that noise, these people are my mortal enemies and I will fight them tooth and nail.