Jobs of the 21st Century.. Can you measure up?

You must be certifiably healthy..

no fudging on the questionnaire...they can get (and probably WILL) access to your health records..what meds you have taken, what you have been treated for...what runs in your family..


You must be "creditworthy"...

no deadbeats wanted..your credit history will be (and probably is) available to prospective employers.. can't accidentally hire someone who might stuff his/her pockets with post-its and paperclips...people who have "hurt" credit card companies by declaring bankruptcy, could be interested in stealing from an employer too


You must be "clean and sober and tobacco-free"

they can (and some do) drug test you to prove what you have been "up to". you "could" refuse to take the test, but then they just won't hire you.


You must be meek and maleable

can't have rabble-rousers coming into a workplace and stirring up the other employees... and the internet makes a "search" on your outside activities easier than ever.. those diatribes you wrote a while back, can come back to haunt you...


You must be able to prove your education

it's easier than ever to check out your references and educational claims.


You must be ready to adapt your political/religious views.

if your prospective boss wants a daily prayer session, or expects you to support the candidates he/she prefers, you better be ready to toe the line


You better be a person of "good moral character"

there are people now who can tell bosses what books you check out, what magazines you read, what you buy at the grocery store, what protests you attended, who you donated to, what organizations you belong to..


After you pass muster and prove that you are worthy, you can finally make that trip to human resources and sign up for your paper hat and monogrammed polo shirt. Next stop, Walmart, to pick up a pair of $8 "sensible shoes" and a pair of $5 Honduran black slacks.

Want fries with that??

no wonder everyone's looking, but no one's getting hired.

Sad to know that illegal immigrants are so much better than American workers.

they never ask for raises, show up early, leave late..never report the boss when they are injured due to negligence..don;t ask for benefits..

and they work for peanuts..

I would bet almost everything, that they are told that social security & taxes are withheld from their pay, when in actuality, the boss is just pocketing it.