LOL...one of the funniest prank phone calls I've ever heard!

I was listening to a local Dallas sports station where they played this hilarious audio from the Dr. Laura show...wish I had the audio.

It went something like this (paraphrased):

Dr. Laura welcomes a caller who wants to ask her for some moral advise. The caller sounded very sincere and intelligent and began by saying that he was rather embarrassed about this moral dilema...DL said to go ahead. He proceeded to tell her that he and some friends at work had made a bet on what day Terry Schiavo would die, that he had won a lot of money, felt guilty and wanted to know what would be the right thing to do with the money (like, give it to charity or something like that).

DL, obviously disgusted, tells him that this was very wrong in the first place and that he should give all the money back to the people who were in on the bet and tell each one that what they did was wrong.

Seamlessly the caller asked her if she's sure that would be the best thing to do and that he's wondering because now he's got money down on the pope.

DL quickly hung up on him and said something like: Well, this is obviously a prank phone call and that some people are just disgusting, immoral, blah, blah, blah.

I was literally in tears laughing...

it's funny...

:P

humor. Between this and pies and salad dressing in the face, we WILL win this!!!! We will just laugh these fundies right out off the streets.

:spray::spray::spray::spray:


:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

...some woman called up and sounded very reasonable, saying that she was having some "issues" with her husband for an indiscretion.

The woman said she just couldn't get past it, and wanted Dr. Laura to help her forgive him.

Dr Laura pontificated about the virtues of forgiveness and said it was a good sign that the woman was attempting to forgive and heal her marriage.

Dr. Laura asked the woman what her husband did and the woman replied, "Well, I came home early from a business trip and found him in bed with my mother in law."

Stunned for a second, Dr. Laura replied, "Your MIL. That would mean that your husband was in bed with his mother."

The woman replied, "Yes, and my husband was dressed in a French's maid's costume and my MIL had on a...

at that point, Dr. Laura cut off the caller.

I loved it, cuz Dr. Laura takes herself way too seriously.

And you're right, DL does take herself way too seriously (except when she's getting nude pictures taken of herself apparently).

Most of the sanctimonious self-righteous cretins do.

Some person calling up this poor woman, and using Jack Nicholson quotes from "A Few Good Men."

LOL

http://media.ebaumsworld.com/jacknich.mp3


"Have you ever served in a forward area?" LOL!!!! :)

I for one could not go on for more than 30 seconds without cracking up.

It was probably one of Dr. Laura's fans from the pink triangle group.

"Hi, I'm calling from The Florida Citrus Grower's Association. When was the last time you enjoyed a cool, refreshing glass of Florida Orange Juice?"

"Why, I just had some today at breakfast."

"GOD DAMN IT IT, ISN'T JUST FOR BREAKFAST ANYMORE!!!!!"

<click>

Thanks to Saturday Night Live for inspiring that one.

And with the invention of three-way calling (something our household was among the first to purchase) emerged a whole new category of prank-calls-- covertly conferencing two people together who have no idea who called whom.

We took great glee in connecting people who hated one another, although complete strangers were also entertaining to connect.

Few things provide the morbid amusement value of secretly connecting a guy to his recently ex-girlfriend in the middle of the night.

Or, for that matter, connecting the ex-girlfriend to the guy's new girlfriend. Sixth grade girls can be surprisingly nasty to one another.

The best was when the ex-girlfriend's father was the one who answered the phone at 2 AM and the guy stammers, "I didn't call you, YOU called ME!"

Ah, elementary school jocks everywhere beware: the nerds are smarter than you and they know how to use technology. All your base are belong to us!


I consider this next one the crowning achievement of my prank-calling career. I pulled this one off twice on two different people.

This was my completely original and highly detailed social engineering project to convince a neighbor that some unknown third-party had paid thousands of dollars in excise tax on his vehicle, and that he needed to stand in line for hours at the Registry of Motor Vehicles the next day to clear things up.

"Why are you calling me at eleven PM?"

"I'm sorry, sir, but on your contact form you wrote that the best time to contact you is between 11 PM and 1 AM."

"I didn't fill out any contact form."

"Ah, I see. Well, it is probably the same person who paid the excise tax against your vehicle who wrote that. I'm really troubled by this, because I can see no logical reason why anyone would pay thousands of dollars in excise tax against a vehicle they don't even own. It's a black 1986 Camaro, license plates XXX 123, am I correct?"

"Yes, that's correct. You mean someone else paid my excise tax?"

"Yes sir, that's right. In fact, they paid $9,000 in excise tax on your vehicle. This really bothers me. I see no point to it. I can't imagine any way they could profit from this legally or illegally. That's what I find so troubling."

"Are you sure it's not a mistake?"

"No, it has to be intentional. They listed your name, a black 1986 camaro license plates XXX 123, they gave your address at 123 Main Street, left your phone number, and said to call between 11 PM and 1 AM."

"Could it be a joke?"

"Would you pay $9,000 to make a joke? Damn, this really bothers me. What's the sense in this?"

"Who wrote the check?"

"Well, that's hard to say. The funds came from a wire transfer in The Cayman Islands."

It helped that I had done all the preparation before hand and that I had a computer keyboard to tap on so I'd sound like I was actually working somewhere.

The guy sounded very convinced, and I would not be at all surprised if he actually went to the RMV with his registration and title to clear things up.

God, what if he's reading this?

Of course, this is back in the days before Caller ID, when I was a minor, and long enough ago that any statute of limitations will have run out on my youthful indiscretions (I hope). It was also back when going to the DMV or RMV was a sure way to waste an entire afternoon.

In any case, learn this lesson: If you like to tinker with your engine in the middle of the night, please do not blast your car stereo while you do so. Some of us are asleep during the hours between 11 PM and 1 AM.

...I would love to add it to my collection.

It was a heartless prank, but morning talk radio is a heartless medium, especially on the "right" side of the dial. I listened to Dr. Laura when she was on in Charlotte for a few minutes each morning. Her show was about as fun as hearing a burned-out, alcoholic Sunday-school teacher berating a class of kids, minus most of the biblical crap.

off the tragic death of her mother? Which went undetected by her saintly daughter for several weeks...possibly two months? The good "doctors" response was that her mother just wasn't "lovable". Wow. This from a devoutly religious daughter who chose to ignore the "honor thy mother and father" teaching. Along with that troublesome adultery commandment...really, you can't steal the boss from his wife if you follow every single commandment!
Kudos to the caller. More and more. Make all the hate-talkers aware that we're onto their hypocrisy. "Dr." Laura is a false prophet. Call her out. Every day.

Promotes family values, estranged from her mother, opposes birth control, has had her tubes tied, espouses saving oneself for marriage, admits to having had sex before she was married, opposes adultery, has committed adultery while she was married, and has slept with a married man, opposes divorce, is divorced and remarried, has posed for nude photos which are available online.

Dr. Laura and Dr. Phil face off in a boxing ring to fight for the title of "biggest main stream media quack asshole who gives meaningless family advice".

3 to 2 Dr. Laura kicks his ass.

of her martial arts training. A prediction from me. There will be much more hypocrisy to come. Dr. Laura has a son who, according to co-workers, she totally indulges and allows to run wild. Maybe. I do know that I was listening to her once and she was lamenting how the teachers at his pricey private school were intentionally grading him down because they were liberal and resented her politics. Really? Sounds like the good "Dr." has plenty of excuses for her spoiled kid. Someone, oh, maybe someone who gives advice for a living, ought to tell the woman that a sure way for your kid to fail is for you to provide ready made excuses...your teachers resent me...so you received a poor grade. It's not your fault.
Gee, doubt the radio "Doc" would tell one of her callers it's not the kid's fault.
Physician, (which she is not) heal thyself.

:spray:

:rofl: