This is (Kind of) a hard question to ask but Curiosity is getting the...

..best of me.

I notice in my travels through life and depicted on TV that:

There's a lot of inter-racial couples with White Girl/Black Guy But I rarely see couples the other way around... (Black Girl/White Guy)

Oh..I see a few now and then but I wonder if it's because White Guys are more Prejudice than White Women??

..balanced that way.

The number one white guy/black girl relationships in my school was about 60/40 over white girl/black guy. I know 2 personally that have gotten married; one couple has 3 kids.

Unless you're an out-and-out racist, what race a woman is doesn't matter in the least. Salma Hayek is the hottest woman I've ever seen (other than my wife, of course), and she's hispanic. Look at all the white guys lusting over Beyonce or Lil' Kim or Foxy Brown; I doubt they would turn down a relationship from any of them because of their race.

Don't think we'd label Whoopi Goldberg a racist (for example).

BTW, I'm not saying YOU think this... just elaborating on the subtopic
involved.

Sexuality is a pretty darned complex issue. Who we are attracted to is influenced by many, many things.

For some people, mates of same OR opposite 'race' may not appeal for whatever reason.

And those reasons don't necessarily stem from prejudice as much as stuff going back to our infancy (and IMO, past lives).

There can also be a "racist" aspect to those "appeals." Actually "racist" is WAY too harsh a word. There are times when I wish Englisch had the subtlety of German...

My personal take on the demographics is that the B/W-M/F configuration is (just pulling numbers outta my ass) 80%.

Could we discuss race and gender?
Or the societal totem pole?
Or how WW/BM are the "middle child twins?"
Or the "view from the bottom?"

OR, OR, OR....

however, my empirical observations would lead me to agree with you.

I rarely dated black men. The few in my environs were into white women.
My first boyfriend (4) was the towhead across the street. We were "together" for an "eternity!" ;-)

It is TV. you see what they want you to see. Don't make the Dan Quayle mistake of thinking Murphy Brown is really pregnant.

Nice snark there! Welcome to DU! :)

..about who dates who or marries who, just as long as they're happy.
I know several couples (well..4) who are black guys/white women but don't know any the opposite.

Even my black friends usually answer the question with:
"You got me..I've wondered about that also"

before you contradict

allows me to see things as they are.
Maybe the reason is the place that I live just Statistically has a high percentage of Black Guy/ White Girl and I'm not seeing the whole picture....(across the USA)

I said "You see what THEY want youy to see." Not "what you want to see."

..what I see in daily life and not TV (Well..as much as I can..You know how that goes..)
..Or perhaps ..Tonight.. I'm just to stupid to see your point.

and do you date outside your "demographic?" Just curious...

I think he was talking about physical observations in the real world, so...Good Grief! yourself.

He specifically mentions TV

i read life and totally missed tv...so apologies to you, and Good Grief! to me, i guess :hi:

less muscular, less virile, paler, etc., whereas A lot of white women find black men attractive physically and are also curious about their "attributes".

As for black women, there is still less acceptance/appreciation among whites for the black female's "fuller figure". When you do see black women on TV, they are usually "high yellow" Halle Berry types.

It's stupid, but I do think that's part of it.

"black female's "fuller figure"

Contributions to stereotypes are not tax deductible

with their bodies than white woman. it is something i admire in the black woman. she loves her body, even if it isnt toothpick slim, beyond a white woman. i think it is something grand they have over us white women. also, lordy, they dont age, lol lol. i am at 43 and wrinkles. i have a 70 yr old black woman friend, told her the other day i look older than her.

anyway, i do believe from what i see black women are much more accepting of body than whites

But I get downright irate when people say that people of any skin color have attributes that are characteristic of that race. The post to which I responded came pretty close to that.

what advertisers and programmers think Mr. and Mrs. Middle America think.

Whatever.

what about sickle cell?

Not everything that relates to race is racist.

...the concept of "race" itself is erroneous. It is a social construct imposed upon our species. It doesn't exist anywhere other than beyond the human mind.

The genetic markers to which you refer don't follow suit either. The sickle cell trait is a byproduct of a mutation that enhances immunity to malaria. It is common in populations with ancestry from tropical regions all across the globe.

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and that is mildly offensive to me. If I was a black woman with a big ass I would be livid!

"Ample derriere" is a much more respectful description, and I happen to think they are nice, whether it's on J. Lo or on Theresa Randle.

If you were a black woman, you'd be livid at YOU for ragging on women with full figures.

I think women with full figures are beautiful.

And the Ultra-PC bitching about "generalizations" is so tired.

Like we're supposed to pretend that there are no common cultural or physical traits among ethnic groups. How dishonest is that?

Is directly related to diet and exercise and only tangentially related skin color or genetic considerations. To imply that skin color is a deciding factor in hip size is rather strange if not racist.

It's not just size or weight, it's shape.

But I don't want to get into it too much here, because although I disagree that such discussions are "racist", I do believe that discussing women as though they are pieces of meat is undoubtedly sexist. So, I drop the subject.

size 7, but I do believe white men have lost their appreciation for curves. I don't know whether it is because of the images of emaciated white women on television or what, but I am frequently "appreciated" by men of Hispanic, African American, and Indian genealogy, while "white men" seem to be either intimidated by me or unattracted to me.

There is something to this line of questioning and I don't think it's racist really. I am actually very curious as to what people in this thread will say about this issue. I have never really had the guts to ask a man "why" he is attracted to me. I have been a married woman for 18 years and we dated for 4 before that so any man that has ever approached me in a bar without my husbands presence has been "fended off" by me.

My husband BTW, is Hungarian and Polish. Looks more Hispanic or Arab than white and he has specifically mentioned he finds "skinny" white women unattractive.

One problem is that some women who are bigger are too mannish. Big in the shoulders is a turn-off. But curves like Anna Nicole had in her heyday are quite nice, IMO.

But keep the likes of Chyna Doll or Kate Moss or Callista Flockhart away please. Not the least bit curvy.

He saw her in Spanglish and commented that she looks like s#!t! Not very many white women that I know of are truly endowed with Anna Nicole's figure. Even Anna Nicole wasn't endowed with it but neither are most of us designed to look pencil thin like Flockhart and who would want to. I don't know how that woman can pick up a piece of paper let alone carry a sleepy two year old child off to bed at night!

Men need to get a clue that women are actually meant to have a little bit of meat on their bones. All women, not just certain races. And quite frankly some white woman need to actually learn to appreciate the curves God gave them. They are meant to make childbirth and motherhood easier! had to throw that in there since it's Mothers Day.

The standard of beauty that is all over the media in this country is represented by thin, (usually) blonde, white women. This highly prized representation of American beauty worldwide seldom includes women of color.(Jessica/Britney/Paris overkill) Even the network bimbettes, especially on Fox, follow that mold.

The closer you can get to the anglo standard (light skinned, straight-haired, long-haired black women like Beyonce), the more likely you are going to be judged as being "beautiful" by the mainstream. (Again, the network bimbettes follow the mold. Look at Soledad O'Brien, Frederica Whitfield, or Kieran Chetry.) It's no accident that the first black Miss America was Vanessa Williams (beautiful though she is).

To a certain extent this thought extends to the hispanic culture as well (looking more 'spanish' or european instead of 'morena', or brown/darker.)

I had a white guy tell me once he just thought black women weren't that attractive. While that may be his personal preference (and that's fine, that's his right), no doubt the media (as well as a lack of exposure to the myriad of variety in black beauty) helped formulate that opinion. I've also heard magazine editors say in TV interviews that black women on fashion magazine covers didn't sell as well as when white women were on the cover. Is that because black women aren't as beautiful? No...but (with the exception of passing fads or the ethnicity-du-jour) the fashion industry is going to go with what makes them money.

So if you see a white guy with a black woman, don't be surprised if you see white women commenting as to why 'he's with her when he could have one of us (the epitome and standard that is understood in this country to be the pinnacle of beauty).'

I imagine it was treated as a slap in the face to Thomas Jefferson's wife to know he was fooling around with a beautiful black woman, since white women were/are supposed to be the paragon of virtue and beauty.

Edit: Let me state for the record that I'm female, biracial, in an interracial marriage, and feel ALL women have beauty to contribute, whatever their background OR age :-)

I think it does have a lot to do with what image of female "beauty" is perpetuated in our culture.

Oh, the AGONY of not having "good hair." A towel will suffice. See: Whoopi Goldberg and her "long luxurious blonde hair." :rofl:

I know quite a few white women who are married to black guys but zero vice versa.

I think it has more to do with the fact white males tend to be more caught up in the white male patriarchial oppressor thinking and are less tolerant than Black males.

I'm sure this will piss off a lot of people, but the most racist people I know are white males and the least racist people I know are Blacks and Gays.

Just look at the KKK, who are the leaders and most of the members? WHITE MALES.

I doubt that helps, but my guess is there is a truth under the surface that should be examined.

MZr7

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:D

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:)

But you are not a racist?

yes, it's about an average of many people, but there is nothing inherently racist in generalizations based on averages

Is called "general to specific" You can't say that the average black person has a larger penis so that black person has a larger penis.

..and I'm making a Joke from what the other posts said..
..And you're being combative..When you know (knew) full well what I meant.

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You men keep runnin' this horseshit about horsedick down while women been tellin' you FOR DECADES... "It ain't the size, it's what you DO with it." Just another example of how it's all about how MEN discuss, evaluate and perceive it. :evilgrin:

Isn't that odd? Probably because most of my life has been in the south and the northwest, but your post just sparked that observation in my mind.

Getting back on topic, I've only known personally of relationships with black men and white women. However, in the Lounge is a reference to a Maryland lottery ad which features a couple at home, watching TV. She is black, he is white. So, there you have it.

You didn't see them, but they are there.

Pretty common in the northwest and in Vegas and Phoenix..

Bear with me here, this theory might seem outlandish or even offensive but it's my honest opinion.

Black women in this country have a reputation for being strong and dominant, and so do white men. That leads to a clash. On the other hand, black men and white women have been oppressed by white men for centuries. That leads to a special attraction.

between cultural factors and racial physical characteristics. In the light of cultural differences, it is an understandable position

Black women are a very oppressed segment of our society. They face both racism and sexism. If you look at SES indicators: education, income, home ownership, etc. Black men are better off than Black women.

a friend and I came to basically the same conclusion recently. He's a black male, and I'm a white (mostly) female. Unfortunately for some, they still think that going out with a white woman gets them some kind of respect from their peers.

our take on the cultural similarities between white men and black women make sense and is in line (broadly) with my own observations and experiences.

on the societal totem pole.

BW/WM power structure is fixed in concrete. Challenge it and you find when you hit the bottom of the river that's what the shoes you got on be made of. :evilgrin:

as I don't really pay that much attention. But if it is true one possible reason may be that it is far more likely for black men to consider a white woman as a trophy wife than the other way around. I know that many black women were quoted as stating that OJ Simpson did that with Nicole whom he left his black first wife for. In this society white women are more associated with normal standards of beauty than black women. Thus white women would be more likely to be a trophy type wife.

But I know several black women whose father's and grandfather's would have their hide if they brought a white man home.
My cousin is married to a black lady and they had a very difficult time with her parents allowing them to date.
Their problem was that society as a whole will more accept a white woman with mixed children, but frown upon black women who have white children.
It is racist. It always comes back to that, but racism can occur on either side of the aisle.
Oh, and SIZE does matter too,lol.
:)

The first couple that came to my mind was on the Jeffersons. Can't think of their names.

...the Jeffersons were one of the few shows to have a white man/black women.

enough to base a thread on?

dating white is moving down for a white male. ...
sad sick stereotype

finding as many Black men at same level of education and salary earning.

So there's both the compatability issue, the availability issue and also the problems men have accepting women who make more then they do.

This is actually a pretty complex issue and it's kind of sad this thread doesn't really discuss much of what's going on.

I will edit this with a link to an older (97) Ebony article for those who might want to read a bit more info:

http://pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/ads?client=ca-pub-8837386872777606&dt=1115565077680&lmt=1115565077&alternate_ad_url=http%3A%2F%2Fsearch.looksmart.com%2Fs%2Finhouse.html&format=160x600_as&output=html&channel=1569012113&url=http%3A%2F%2F64.233.161.104%2Fsearch%3Fq%3Dcache%3AXsrHaNPExZgJ%3Awww.findarticles.com%2Fp%2Farticles%2Fmi_m1077%2Fis_1_55%2Fai_57046411%2Bblack%2Bwomen%2Bwhite%2Bmen%2Bebony%26hl%3Den%26start%3D1&color_bg=FFFFFF&color_text=333333&color_link=0000FF&color_url=999999&color_border=FFFFFF&ad_type=text&ref=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2Fsearch%3Fhl%3Den%26q%3Dblack%2Bwomen%2Bwhite%2Bmen%2Bebony%26btnG%3DGoogle%2BSearch&u_h=600&u_w=800&u_ah=572&u_aw=800&u_cd=16&u_tz=-240&u_his=5&u_java=true

and I got your back, BlueJazz for bringing it up.

I'm the mother of bi-racial boys who has discussed this issue with white mothers of bi-racial children (just ONE aspect of a HUGE subject). It's pretty fascinating. My oldest tells me of being trailed by security in a store UP TO THE POINT of calling to his dad in the next aisle and having a WHITE MAN appear. (He also has HYSTERICAL "fly-on-the-wall" stories as his Japanese is fluent and NO ONE. NO ONE. NO. ONE. EVER ENTERTAINS that possibility).

In my view, DSC's picked up the scent of the central issue. Men's choices in women (generalizing here) are about the approbation of OTHER MEN. What "status" does a women bring in the eyes of other men? Think David and Iman.

My goodness, the "dark recesses" of our inculcated constructs we could explore here!!! :evilgrin: My most frequently asked question to bi-racial children here (teens to 30-somethings) is, "Are you GERMAN?"
I've had a desire for MANY years to explore the myriad answers to that question in a "scientific" context.
Imma leave it at that for now and see where this goes...

but I do tend to agree with you: men are more racist than women. That may be a factor in your perceptions. I think this idea is supported in general by political polls that usually more women tend to adhere to liberal political positions and Democratic candidates than do men.

my father - from another generation where racism was pretty matter of fact - pointed this out to me when I was a teenager: that its always white women who "lower their standards" and not white men...

but as a petite but fairly "curvy" white woman men of other ethnic backgrounds are far more attracted to me than most white men. My body style has always been more of a Jennifer Lopez style then a Paris Hilton style.

I really don't have a "racial" preference to be quite honest. I am married to a Polish/Hungarian man, who could easily pass as Hispanic and even Arab if he stays out in the sun long enough and grows a beard but I dated a variety of different ethnicities.

Maybe "white men" really are attracted to that emaciated image of white women they are exposed to so often?

I wonder how well Marilyn Monroe would go over with this generation of white men?

This is an interesting question. I think I'll read through some more responses. Maybe find an answer to why I am approached more by men of other nationalities than my friends who actually are of other nationalities...

that white women will put up with a 'lot more shit' from men than black women will......'he can get away with a lot more running around, etc, if he's with a white woman than if he's with a black one'

2) from observations in OK, still pretty racist, lots of people think less 'pretty' white women can't 'get' white guys and 'have to settle for black guys'.....and 'black guys date up'

And the stares I get!

... to race... religion... ethnicity... culture... class... nationality... physical appearance... and bigotry sees what it wants to see.

I don't watch much TV.

Mud so thick and deep it ain't even splattering. No traction.
Me go sleep now. Bis Morgen! :hi: