SCOTT McCLELLAN DIRECTS NEWSWEEK (Humor)

SCOTT McCLELLAN DIRECTS NEWSWEEK MAGAZINE TO IMMEDIATELY CEASE AND DESIST INFRINGING PRESIDENT BUSH'S PATENT FOR THE MASS ENRAGEMENT OF MUSLAMIAN WACKOS
Mr. Richard M. Smith
Chairman, President & Editor-in-Chief
Newsweek Magazine
251 West 57th Street
New York, NY 10019

May 17, 2005

Dear Mr. Smith,

I represent White House, Inc. and its President & CEO, George W. Bush. It has come to our attention that information contained within the May 9, 2005 issue of your publication, Newsweek Magazine, infringes Mr. Bush's U.S. Patent #5,783,346, which covers "Fail-Safe Systems for the Mass Enragement of Muslamian Religious Wackos."

As you are no doubt aware, this groundbreaking patent includes, but is not limited to such specific innovations as "exploitation of politically-manipulated intelligence to declare pre-preemptive war against unsaved sub-humans, long-term occupation of xenophobic desert backwaters by a culturally bankrupt Christian crusader force, waging fierce offensives inside ancient, ultra-sacred cemeteries, and subjecting Muslamiac prisoners of war to compulsory, ultra-hot homoerotic role-playing and rape room photo shoots, as well as punitive feminization through forced transvestitism and the application of cooter blood facials."


Link: http://www.whitehouse.org/news/2005/051705.asp


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