materials, etc., for those going to Cindy vigils

A couple's balancing act

Helena Independent Record

By LAURA TODE - IR Staff Writer - 07/16/05

Tammara Rosenleaf wears a steel dog tag around her neck stamped with her husband's name and social security number. Alongside the tag she often wears the number 85441, a reminder of one of an estimated 100,000 soldiers and civilians killed in Iraq since the war started. The number was assigned by Counting the Cost, an organization aimed at raising awareness of the human cost of the war in Iraq.

Tears well to her eyes as she slips the steel tag along the chain around her neck, and her voice rises with emotion when she talks about the war. Rosenleaf has been a fervent and outspoken anti-war activist since U.S. troops first invaded Iraq. Her husband Sean Hefflin, 26, joined the Army in October last year. He's leaving for Iraq in November. The couple talked for weeks about the decision. He decided to enlist even though Rosenleaf said she believed he was making a serious mistake. "Every move that he makes closer to contributing to the destruction of Iraq, I make a move in the opposite direction," she said.

Her efforts include frequent anti-war protests and active involvement in Military Families Speak Out, an organization for soldiers' families who oppose the war in Iraq. Rosenleaf's bracelets jingle when she talks, and her wavy red hair fights the braid it's tied into. She is passionate by nature, and war and her husband's decision to join the military have made her more so.

She may oppose the war, but Rosenleaf is every bit a soldier's wife, proud, supportive and concerned for her husband's safety. "I can be proud of my husband, and ashamed of my government at the same time," she said. "I clearly know those two things are apart from each other."

At 47, Rosenleaf grew up with the memory of Vietnam, and watched an uncle pass away from exposure to Agent Orange. She said Hefflin and most people his age have no context on which to base their values. "He doesn't have a consciousness yet to know what he's doing," Rosenleaf said. "When he goes over there and sees for himself, I believe he'll develop that consciousness." The two talk frequently about the war, its effects and the role of the U.S. military in rebuilding the country. Sometimes they agree, sometimes they don't, but their discussions are respectful.

"I understand where Tammara is coming from and I don't disagree with her. I believe the points she makes are valid, solid points that if more people had made, we would have fewer people there," he added. "I wish more people in this country believed like she does."