Cons....News not going so well? Consider "Rent-A-Blonde"!

Pesky revelations coming out? Indictments going down? NO PROBLEM! Call Rent-A-Blonde tm! We will arrange for one of our professional models to go "missing" (billed monthly). We invoice you our package price of airfare and lodging for the model to go on a secluded tropical vacation (no, not at Gitmo, sillies!); a press package to be sent same-day-service to Wolf Blitzer, Joe Scarborough, and Greta van Susteren (BONUS! Free shipment to Jeff Gannon); full phony biographical information and videotapes of the model at church, playing the harp, feeding deer from her hand, and volunteering at a "leper camp" to be played in a continuous loop on the news networks; and her sudden "reappearance" event at the church of your choice. Storm clouds not past? We'll arrange for another of our lovelies to take her place (24 hour minimum between disappearances for legitimacy sake). We have models available so you can ride this until 2008 or at least until impeachment.

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Yes, you can deflect it all! Hundreds of satisfied clients. Call 1-866-MISSING or email Candi Smoot at www.rentablonde.com today!




With apologies to jokerman93, who inspired the idea.

or you guys are going to be busy.

OOPS. May have trouble with wife on that one. Oh Well.

:rofl:

MSNBC would go missing -- permanently.

Nice post BTW

That's what I thought it was.
Bluebear, awesome. I'm sick of this obsession too.

Good post. I like the endorsement.

can she pretend to have been attacked by a shark causing her to remain in a persistent vegetative state?

plug, she can have a MIRACULOUS full recovery! Even healing the shark bite scars!

What a beautiful idea!

That.Was.Brilliant. :D

:yourock:

'Act NOW and Rent-A-Blonde will include at NO EXTRA CHARGE a full bio and mug shot of the most likely "suspect" (specify black, Latino or fiance), an UPGRADE from our normally included "charcoal police sketch".'

:rofl:

shills...were they kidnapped and brainwashed? Where did they all come from, anyway? Maybe there is a corellation somewhere. Kind of like prostitutes from a foreign country. Except that they come from this country, so - unless their family is being held at gunpoint - they are actually responsible for the nonsense that they spew.

Paint 'em up differently and slightly reprogram the macros; call them "interns" and ship them out to the MSM.

OTOH, what the HF considers attractive in women has me thoroughly confused, but it seems to work.

I used to make those when I was little. Along with "Creeple Peeple." So THAT'S what became of those creations after all these years! Makes sense.

:toast:

:headbang:

;-)

Don't ever plant a warped seed in my mind, you see what happens!

:rofl:

:rofl:

B cubed rules !

I like it :)

:rofl: :kick:

Great post BB! :rofl:

Hey freeptard BushlerBots!



You can ride this for under a buck: :D

Tahiti, I swear; and I can't tolerate alcohol, so there will be no pesky questions about my that...

I'm PERFECT (except that I'm older than 30--is that an immediate disqual?!)

We are going to have to figure out an angle. Can you be a Sunday School teacher?

remote Carribean island.

I just helped on an opening day collection in my city, so a third-world emerging tropical paradise should be a cinch...

Bonus: my hubby is a swarthy type often mistaken for Mexican, Italian, or Arab, too!

For a small additional fee, he will return to the evil unibrow...

:yourock:

:rofl:

I love this place. (hopefully this post was coherent and empty of all gender slurs)

:wow:

fake blondes :evilgrin: