wondering if anyone else is getting literally SICK from all this

i've had a migraine for days. my aunt is sick with one. i had a minor emotional breakdown yesterday reminiscent of the last episode of the second season of Millennium. Patti Smith's Four Horsemen if you know what i mean.

anyone else getting physically ill from the inhumanity?

god i wish my doc would call back with some damn Axert!

My sister, who has a private therapy practice, is offering free counseling for anybody in our area who's been affected by Katrina, whether evacuees or locals who are devastated.

Meanwhile, treat yourself gently and try to take good care of yourself. We need to be strong and take care of ourselves and each other, because I think this is just the beginning of what we'll need to do.

the wisdom of being gentle with myself.

i fielded no less than 3 calls from different friends all over the country this weekend. marriages breaking up -- fights -- disconnect -- ennui. with every call i could say is "there's a lot of THAT going around."

And that was just from watching the coverage. I don't even know anyone from NO or Mississippi. What people must be going through who experienced it or have friends and relatives from the area, I can't even imagine.

who knows what was going on in his little dog mind, but he was inconsolable. screaming, shaking. it was pitiful.

this. :)

my pets are actually clueless

they just think we're on vacation

i've taught them to be good travelers just in case of these evacuations tho

he's an emotional dog -- a rescue from a wrecked semi-truck of puppy mill dogs. a lot of them died from heat exposure. so, he has a panic attack every time he gets in the car; and everytime he hears us leave (if we don't have a greenie), and occassionally, for no reason at all.

i'm actually looking to take in storm orphaned animals. we kinda "get" trauma as it manifests in the four-leggeds. we live for our dogs and they make us better people.

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i haven't been able to eat any more than a piece of fruit here and there. finally, last nite my hubby made some burgers and i realized i was famished.

the pain of it all would deter me, but the intial comfort of hand-to-mouth just can't be beat. *sigh*

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popcorn this weekend it wasn't funny. and the cool thing is he really perfected his technique in popping it. it was the best popcorn i think i've ever had.

I have had diarrhea,my stomach has been in knots and my heart aches. I've cried everyday and have been pissed more than I can express in words.My heart goes out to the victims of the horrifying situation they are in NEEDLESSLY. If we had real LEADERSHIP,the suffering wouldn't have been so long after the hurricane was over.I think of all the dead,the animals that have suffered,all the grief and then I see that sneering bastard on tv joking and laughing,talking about how much "fun" he used to have in Houston,like all the suffering and dying didn't mean a damn thing.I want to see Karma....I want to see HIM suffer.I am tired of everyone else going through hell and his life is just one big long picnic. I am sick of it.

i think i feel better working thru this in words.

i was having quite an episode yesterday -- hearing Broussard's clip over and over -- and went inside to cry. i looked out the window and saw a guy driving by in a new convertible mustang, seemingly without a care in the world, and just lost it. the words that came out of my mouth were, "you bastards." it was a generic curse.

you bastards who have been given the joy of and responsibility of living on this planet -- you have let "us" down. have your joy, but dammit, take some responsibility.

I didn't watch any coverage of the storm and I didn't check in at DU from Friday afternoon until Sunday morning. I told my son I was suffering from sensory overload - indigestion and stress headache - so I took a break.

I feel much better now. But I'm even more pissed off than I was.

I can't sleep at night, I feel like shit during the day, and I can't concentrate on ANYTHING. My mind keeps going back to my people, suffering, dying... Nothing can make it stop.

can't sit still. i'm driving nuts, b/c i deal totally differently. sitting very still and reading. he asked his doc for something to help him sleep and it seems to be helping.

I find that if I pass out wasted, the dreams aren't so bad.

MojoXN

but i have been drinking to commisarate and in quantities that isn't usual or good for me. i'm usually pretty allergic to a certain quantity of drink, and i haven't had one hangover or episode -- but i've had constant headaches, nausea otherwise. come to think of it, the head pain and the nausea go away when i have a glass of wine at nite. i'm opposite of how i "should" be.

oh and smoking way too much.

sleeping 8 hrs. a nite went out the window long ago

I also suffered chronic anger resulting from the coup. After last year's election I decided to take a caring break. Basically I said to self, "your fellow Americans elected (more or less) this asshole once again so fuck it, let them reap the results. Go find other pursuits to occupy your mind".

I did real well until last Tuesday. Now I'm seething at Bush and company, the Bush apologists, and sick about the immense human tragedy and the flippant remarks that I'm beginning to hear about soem of the victims.

i've noticed that the most angry are also the "optimistic" in terms of the potential of humanity. the anger comes from seeing how that's wasted.

i only mention this hopefully lessen your load, in case anger makes you feel guilty. no need. anger is an appropriate response to needless pain. we CAN do better. we MUST do better. that fire in your belly can be a good thing when you need to burn something up. :)

which I haven't done since 9/11 (I've never watched TV in bed, except in hotels) so I could watch the flood coverage. I'd lived in NOLA for a year and worked at Tulane Medical Center and rotated through Charity Hospital. I was watching MSNBC interview a VP from Tulane Medical Center, and she reported the first news of one of the levees breaking. She said that they would probably have to evacuate the patients! I couldn't believe it. They had 'missed' the big hit, and now the levees broke annyway! She said that the police (sheriff?) had told her that it was 2 blocks in length, and she could literally see whitecaps on Canal Blvd...I used to take canal blvd (from Lake Ponchartrain where I lived in Lakeside) to canal street every morning for a year. Needless to say, I didn't sleep that night, and ended up with a sore throat, and now a bad cold (which I invariably get only when I'm really stressed. I'm almost never sick.) All week, I've watched this human tragedy play out in front of my eyes, while I screamed in horror, threw things in rage (my mouse, my remotes etc), and cried uncontrollably at times.

I'm still sick. Physically and emotionally. I'm sick at this country and I absolutely despise this current administration. I have never hated any US president until 2000. And my hate seems boundless, and I suffer guilt from that! And he doesn't seem to feel anything.

extended family. i've fielded calls from my girlfriends needing to talk. it seems to be epidemic and is manifesting in many different ways.

when i was a teenager i learned to have "meaningful" cries. you know, let it ALL out. listen to your sadness. let your body express, cleanse.

yesterday was a BIG one for me. luckily my husband went on a motorcycle ride. he was a little miffed that i didn't want to go, but i needed the alone time. i've had a sinus headache since this damn thing started (i was GLUED to monitoring the satellite images). for a week i've battled the damn sinus headache with sudaphed and lots of tea. finally, when i just 'LET IT ALL OUT' it broke up the congestion in my head. headache gone. i felt so much better and really experienced a lot of mental connections. had the feeling that the world is weeping. that i cry b/c that's what "mary/isis/katrina" wants. she needs us to experience her pain with her. we have to give life to her anger and outrage.

it's oddly empowering to know we are sensitive to this. that we are affected by the world. we are the alienated masses we thought we were. we are human and to be so means quantum emotions.

I can't explain it. I feel constantly in the verge of tears.

I tried to drink my sorrows away this weekend and even that didn't work. :puke:

What is going on????????

is real and it can have an effect on your overall health. alcohol is a depressant, and seldom helps. i DO find it helpful, though, to share a glass with a friend and commisarate.

that feeling of being on the verge is classic.

thursday morning. I have had a headache for so long that it seems almost normal now. My stomach is in knots. Yesterday I started doing this rocking motion when I finally slowed down and had a chance to rest, it was quite weird, almost like a pendulum swinging. it has stopped now.
I have really been affected by all of this and many people I know who never gave a fuck before are really upset and almost traumatized by this.

If we are sickened imagine how the evacuees will be. Even my dogs know something is up and are not happy right now. Storm threw up today after crying for 2 hours straight. We have tried to comfort him and take him hiking to get his mind on something but I truly believe he is picking up the sadness in the world. We have opted to not turn on the tv while I am working with the red cross for now. I have to deal with evacuees feelings and cannot let the media influence my attitude for the day. I have decided the only way I will get my news is through the web. Better to turn it off than tune it out.

if you get a chance, look up tremors. that might be what the rocking is. stress by any other name.

as someone who spends all her time alone at the house, it is so good to "reality check" on this. a part of me has felt really guilty about feeling sick all week. i'm not operating at 100 percent. but, it's just not possible right now. thank god we don't have cable.

...and I'm a little depressed.

We sent lots of supplies to Camp Casey, and now I understand they're being used to help Katrina victims. This helps me feel a little better, but I can't help but feel sadness whenever I think about what the NOLA refugees are going through. And I know some folks don't want the term refugees used on NOLA taxpayers, but I'm still coming to terms with the magnitude of this catastrophe. There is a halfway-decent chance that New Orleans may never recover, and that deeply disturbs me.

My ADD is kicking in big time.

Intense month dealing with Peace House, was actually looking forward to the end of the month and W's return to DC so we all could finally get a little rest!

Damned it all!!

The stories coming out this am have swamped me.

I turned off the television this weekend and just started doing something. Writing congressmen, calling congressmen, reading the pathetic National Response Plan and FEMA strategic plan.

It's the helplessness that makes you sick. Refuse to be helpless...TAKE ACTION!!

That bit about people been taken to morgues to die...I'm going to have to call Senator Levin to get over that one...

Seriously people, there are somethings that you are not meant to see unless you have to. When you are in the situation stress makes you able to act and then forget. When you are at home watching it the stress of not being able to act will make you never forget.

Turn off the television and try to make a difference.

to a church who is collecting and distributing things. I actually saw some of the victims of this flood. And I also saw a bunch of nice, little old church ladies working their asses of to help these people. It made me feel a lot better.

mine started when I first talked to my parents about everything and they had a racist take on the whole situation.

Edited due to typo (blame the headache)

thoughts are things, aren't they? i woke with a migraine today after getting rid of a sinus headache. it is helping to force myself work with words, even tho i'm having to use the delete key quite a bit.

caffeine is helping too.
and DU
<hugs>

we take. From the coup d etat in 2000 when they put the country through weeks of indecision - to 911 and its aftermath - pushing the commission not to play the blame game and the thought many of us have in the backs of our minds about LIHOP or MIHOP and not wanting to believe that your government would be party to that. To the pressures of money - everything going up in price (not only gas) except your wages. Not knowing how one is going to make it from paycheck to paycheck. Worrying about healthcare and its costs. Worrying about terrorists attacking us at will. Worrying about whether or not you'll be able to retire. Worrying about getting into financial trouble with the new bankruptcy law. Having your employer work you more hours for less money and saying if you don't we have other people standing in line for your job. Not having a job or having to settle for something less just to salvage your dignity. Should I go on anymore. How about the Iraq War, Axis of Evil and potential for * attacking other countries. Global Warming and the hurricane's and other weather conditions it will bring.

Hurricane Katrina and the loss of NO is just a small part of why we're all sick. I just hope that some of those that voted for these despicable criminals that are running our country are now finally getting sick too.

Even when this *Admin is gone - the country will suffer from Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome Disease.

I find taking breaks from the news helps, and writing Congress and news media works to...

I have a brother I IM and we share tirades of frustration and loathing... need more sleep though...

I hadn't thought to blame it on watching the world end right in front of my eyes, but now that you mention it...

The stress just seems to keep building, in my own personal life (financial woes, being priced out of almost everything, etc.) as well as for, as it seems, the entire world.

signals to me. a few years ago i had reunited with a childhood friend who mentioned she was going to do some therapy and a lightbulb went on in my head! i had not done and "personal work" in years. i had completely ignored my emotional wellbeing. so i commited to remediation. diet, exercise, getting rid of tv. reading. lots of reading. lots of writing. i found a therapist who is also a writer who was very helpful in illuminating areas to for further work.i am so thankful to my friend for nudging me to start on stuff before i was in crisis.

i think age brings renewed sensitivity. having children opens up nerves. money trouble is going to be an issue for everyone. it was part of my path to reduce our material life and simplify. traded a luxury car for a hybrid. quit my job. resolved to live on one income thru reduction.

i'm physically experiencing no appetite, headaches (just got rid of a sinus headache and now have a migraine), nausea from not eating and drinking tea, sleeplessness and my skin simply freaking out. it's like i'm bathing in histimines.

but i'll tell ya what...DU really helps :)

i gotta be strong to rebuild

it is sickening but we can't let it sicken us

things have got to get better some day? right?!

this week is better than last week. Last week, add in a fierce, blinding headache that lasted from Monday through Friday and crying constantly.

This past weekend I tried to rest more, because I am no good to the displaced families being such a mess. I'm no good to myself or my own family like that.

So the headache is gone. The stomach is recovering. But the nightmares....it's getting so I don't WANT to sleep. They're awful.

Oh and my husband normally never has insomnia--falls asleep immediately. He's been tossing and turning until 2 am every night, and he gets up at 5. He's tried watching fluffy shit on TV, reading, walking around the house. I've not ever really seen him like this. He said he just can't get it out of his head, the horror of the government just turning their backs on those people.

and boy oh boy does your hubby sound like mine and all my friends who have been calling. i think women look into the horror and men try to look away. my husband went on a long motorcycle ride yesterday. i wouldn't go and was a little miffed that he was flying the coop, but i really needed the alone time. i used to cry. old-style, teenager, bawling. transcendant crying. that kind of crying that borders on euphoric, halluncinatory, cathatic, transformative. released a lot of anger.

these are good things. this is appropriate. we are not alone.

I need it right now. :(

xanax, ativan, etc.

I am sure.

:pals:

i came down with a cold over the weekend. by thursday, i was feeling a little out of it, and when i finally had some down time saturday afternoon, i just fell apart. i did not go to work all weekend, but instead slept and drank tea.

my skin has been a wreck. i have that canary-in-a-coalmine skin that visibly reacts to stress. so, i've had to pay extra close attention to it with lotion and kindness. it's a good routine, though, to unplug and smell something different and reducing the volume on the irritation. it's like, ahhhhhh.

is feeling sick and depressed, a lot of anxiety and disbelief. I see it and hear it every where I go. The American people are very angry!

Although I work at home, sooo......

It's a combo, but allergy season is in high gear.

Dimwit has been making me sick since the day he was given the presidency. I am having trouble sleeping, but I always have trouble sleeping. I am a Tylenol PM junkie. I have been dragging for the last week, I just do not have any energy. When I was giving my 5 cats, sheepdog and lovebird fresh, clean water last week all I could think about was the people in New Orleans who did not have any. I felt so guilty because my pets were given better care then the people in NO were. I am pissed off, and the first person who tries to defend that dumb ass in front of me is going to get it.

for everything. it started with toilet paper.

this even has me thinking a LOT about water. we live on a system of streams in this old neighborhood, in fact one of the neighboring 'hoods is named after it's springs. seems to me it would make sense to reclaim these water systems and protect them. it seems right. anyhow, it came to mind during all this crap.

I was feeling ill. Saturday afternoon I got away from the TV. At least we can get away and use a clean bathroom and drink cold water.

Friday night I was SO upset, I was rushing around the house trying to get kids to bed, listen to the news, be on line, talk with relatives in NOLA and elsewhere--that I tripped and fell down the stairs and broke my fibula bone at the ankle! Since then, I'm running a fever and have no appetite.

Not seeking sympathy here folks. I shrugged off the injury until I couldn't bear it any longer, thinking if these folks in NOLA can put up with the pain and misery then I can put up with a twisted ankle, and finally went to a walk-in clinic yesterday.

What really got me, is that yesterday, I couldn't fight back the tears while waiting at the clinic. When I first walked in, knowing I'd have a wait ahead of me, I was relieved to see they had TV with cable, thinking I could at least watch some coverage of NOLA (and other related stuff). Lo and behold, they had reruns of Bonanza, over and over, and the fifteen to twenty people sitting around me were like zombies, glued to these reruns with such interest and intent! Granted, some people in a clinic are miserable, in pain, etc., but I wanted to jump up and scream, "Why are you watching this crap?! Do you even know what's going on down south?!"

The only saving grace from the hypnotic state of those around me was the triage nurse. I mentioned to her that she must be feeling for the nurses and other med folks down south who were working their butts off, suffering themselves, with all of the horrors of the medical facilities being flooded, etc.. She started ranting about how it was all Bush & Co.'s fault, and we both had a good rant until I teared up with frustration.

Lastly, when they called my name, an attendant came and picked me up in a wheelchair, despite the fact that I had walked in and insisted I could handle the walk. She was so attentive and gentle, I just couldn't stand it---the stark difference here that I was experiencing in this clean, quiet, well-equipped, sanitary facility compared to the horror that had unfolded before my vary eyes in the preceding days was maddening.

I felt ashamed to have been given appropriate and prompt medical attention! Just ashamed.

appropriate medical attention, and by god, now that everyone has SEEN this happen, maybe, just maybe we can do something about it!

sorry for your ankle tho. ironically, i busted that same bone on my first trip to NO. cracked it on the broken sidewalk b/c i wasn't paying attention to walking. i was too busy trying to figure out how i could drop everything and move there. it was love at first sight, as it was for most everyone, with nola.

I have an aunt, uncle and cousins there and went every summer until I was in my early thirties (haven't been back in a while--finances and kids and all). My cousins have one of those tall duplexes down by Canal street, what do you call those? Who knows what condition it is now!

Anyway, I love it. Every time I go down, my uncle makes etouffee with shrimp, 'cause he knows it's my favorite.

I can remember the first time my cousins took me out on the town when I turned drinking age! Oh, boy!

I am just heartbroken by this.

That is ironic that you messed up your ankle in NOLA!

last year around election time from all the stress. I was told that I'll have to "watch it" for the rest of my life...could come back.
This past week I've been extremely tired and have had migranes on two occasions where I felt sick to my stomach and had to go to bed.

Am hoping I never get shingles again!

it lays dormant until you are having difficulty. then they GETCHA. painful.

Thank god there's tennis on. I can't watch any more news.

headache. My wife says I'm being negative about the whole thing.

and the power of collective unconscious is about.