Democratic Underground Latest Greatest Lobby Journals Search Options Help Login
Google

Jeb Bush Reveals His “Mystical Warrior” Friend

Printer-friendly format Printer-friendly format
Printer-friendly format Email this thread to a friend
Printer-friendly format Bookmark this thread
This topic is archived.
Home » Discuss » Archives » General Discussion (Through 2005) Donate to DU
 
sabra Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:16 AM
Original message
Jeb Bush Reveals His “Mystical Warrior” Friend

http://thinkprogress.org/2005/09/20/jeb-bush-reveals/

Jeb Bush Reveals His “Mystical Warrior” Friend
Last week, after “more than an hour of solemn ceremony” swearing in Rep. Marco Rubio (R-FL) as House speaker, Gov. Jeb Bush stepped to the podium to tell “a short story about ‘unleashing Chang,’ his ‘mystical warrior’ friend.”

Below, courtesy of the Gainesville Sun, are Bush’s words, “spoken before hundreds of lawmakers and politicians”:




“Chang is a mystical warrior. Chang is somebody who believes in conservative principles, believes in entrepreneurial capitalism, believes in moral values that underpin a free society.

“I rely on Chang with great regularity in my public life. He has been by my side and sometimes I let him down. But Chang, this mystical warrior, has never let me down.”


Bush then unsheathed a golden sword and gave it to Rubio as a gift.

‘’I'm going to bestow to you the sword of a great conservative warrior,'’ he said, as the crowd roared.


Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
phantom power Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:17 AM
Response to Original message
1. These guys really are nuts. Off the rails.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
sui generis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:23 AM
Response to Reply #1
6. sounds like they're "on" the rails
those big white powdery ones.

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
yellowcanine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:18 AM
Response to Original message
2. How phallic of him. Is Jebbie a closet gay?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
ChairmanAgnostic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:20 AM
Response to Original message
3. thou shalt not honot false gods, jeb.
Just thought you ought to know.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:21 AM
Response to Original message
4. Bet "Chang" gets blamed for any blunders Jebbie performs
Yeah, next Florida hurricane snafu, Georgie can't blame his bro. Blame Chang.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Poll_Blind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:21 AM
Response to Original message
5. What the shit?!?!
Goddamn. It's the Fruitcake Times*.


* After the End Times, just before the universe ultimately ends.

PB
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Marnieworld Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:24 AM
Response to Original message
7. C'mon now. this is a joke right?
Breaking:Governor has invisible friend. News at 11.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DarkTirade Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 04:12 PM
Response to Reply #7
41. What, and his brother doesn't?
His brother's invisible friend just happens to have a more common name.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Marnieworld Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 09:14 AM
Response to Reply #41
57. Yah but that's everyone's invisible friend
So that makes perfect sense. :eyes:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Cats Against Frist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 09:37 AM
Response to Reply #41
60. Yeah the "Help-A-Dope 3000," which he wears strapped to his back. n/t
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DarkTirade Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 01:13 PM
Response to Reply #60
63. I still think
it's a giant Energizer battery to keep him running.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
orion9941 Donating Member (256 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:25 AM
Response to Original message
8. What the hell?!
What sort of mumbo-jumbo happy horse shit is that?!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
kweerwolf Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:26 AM
Response to Original message
9. WTF?!?!?! ... Chang? Dang!
What a shame Chang wasn't around to keep Jebbie's son out of trouble last weekend in Texas, what with Chang's belief in "moral values" and all.

But then maybe Jeb's kids have their own mystical spirit ... and I'd put money on it being the ghost of John Belushi.

Toga! Toga! Toga! :toast:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
MADem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:54 AM
Response to Reply #9
35. HYSTERICAL!!!!!!!!!! You clever wag, you!!!
Well....seeing as we are in debt to China up to our asses, why shouldn't chubby Jebby's pal be called Chang?

Why do I suspect he named his penis that as well????
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
kweerwolf Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 12:33 PM
Response to Reply #35
39. He may as well call his wang "Chang" ...
... because he certainly couldn't call it "Hung Lo"
:evilgrin:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
MADem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 08:48 PM
Response to Reply #39
45. Well, perhaps his grave disappointment in his member could be
cause for him crying out, in frustration, anger, envy and dismay, "DANG, CHANG!!!!!"

You gave me my laugh of the day!!!!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
mzteris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:28 AM
Response to Original message
10. ijut doesn't know that
CHANG is the word for SPEAR.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
sui generis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:28 AM
Response to Original message
11. "Stang is somebody who believes in
conservative principles, believes in capitalism, believes in republican moral values that underpin a sick closeted repressed society.

I rely on Stang with great frequency in my private life. He has been by my side, in my side, inside my (ahem), and sometimes I put him down. But Chang, this mystical warrior, has never let me down.

Bush then unsheathed a golden dildo and gave it to Rubio as a gift.

I'm going to bestow to you the dildo of a great conservative warrior, he said, and the crowd roared.

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
phantom power Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:29 AM
Response to Original message
12. So, I just read the entire article. It's maybe not as insane as I thought
It's actually a reference to a family metaphor. On the other hand, I still think it's more than a bit weird for politicians to be giving each other golden swords, as part of a swearing-in ceremony.

The crowd, however, could be excused for not understanding Bush's enigmatic foray into the realm of Eastern mysticism. We're here to help.

In a 1989 Washington Post article on the politics of tennis, former President George Bush was quoted as threatening to ''unleash Chang'' as a means of intimidating other players.

The saying was apparently quite popular with Gov. Bush's father, and referred to a legendary warrior named Chang who was called upon to settle political disputes in Chinese dynasties of yore.

The phrase has evolved, under Gov. Jeb Bush's use, to mean the need to fix conflicts or disagreements over an issue. Faced with a stalemate, the governor apparently "unleashes Chang" as a rhetorical device, signaling it's time to stop arguing and start agreeing.


Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
MaineDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:31 AM
Response to Reply #12
14. He meant Michael Chang, the tennis pro
:evilgrin:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
MADem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:58 AM
Response to Reply #12
37. Well, they crowned REV MOON in a Senate Office Building
Edited on Tue Sep-20-05 12:00 PM by MADem
And after a great deal of hemming and hawing, Sen. John Warner (R VA) finally confessed that his office had reserved the room. http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A19-2004Jul20.html

Yo, Moonie, how's yer Chang hangin'?????
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
phantom power Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 12:01 PM
Response to Reply #37
38. Funny, this story also made me think of the Moon crowning ceremony.
We tend to think of politicians as cold cynics, but there seems to be at least an equal measure of wild-eyed mysticism in many current politicians.

It's all just a bit creepy.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Sequoia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:29 AM
Response to Original message
13. I have a parking angel
Right before I need to park in a busy place I call on her and wham-o, there's a spot. However, I have to pay for her services by being nice to people on the road and plugging in a quarter for someone's car where the meter is about to run out and the meter maid is speeding up to give a ticket. You too can have a parking angel, just do what I do only don't go to the same place I am or the angels will have a sword fight...ka Chang!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
mzteris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:32 AM
Response to Original message
15. Poppy bush had a chang, too
Maybe it's a family thing:
In a 1989 Washington Post article on the politics of tennis, former President George Bush was quoted as threatening to "unleash Chang" as a means of intimidating other players.
http://aikane.blogspot.com/
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
phantom power Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:35 AM
Response to Reply #15
16. They are referring to the same Chang.
According to the article, it's become a family thing.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
daninthemoon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:40 AM
Response to Original message
17. OK, The golden sword is the wierdest part, but I'm not willing to
just dismiss Chang as a bush figure of speech. Just consider the possibilty that Chang is an actual demonic presence that favors the imperial family. Does anyone think any of these knuckleheads got where they are on their own merits? Not saying...just consider.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Imagevision Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:40 AM
Response to Original message
18. Jeb Bush: daughters a druggie - the son is a drunk, helluva parent!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
tgnyc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:40 AM
Response to Reply #18
31. He needs to unleash Chang on their asses!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
kestrel91316 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:42 AM
Response to Original message
19. Jebbie has an imaginary friend??
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
LouisianaLiberal Donating Member (848 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:43 AM
Response to Original message
20. I wish I could be delusional too.
Life would be so much easier. Even if I were delusional I don't think I could become a Republican - I still wouldn't be able to reconcile the conflicting ideas that are inherent in that strange ideology.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
pepperlove Donating Member (345 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:47 AM
Response to Original message
21. As if
"brother *" needs more embarrassment at the moment hahahaha
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Joe Chi Minh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:49 AM
Response to Original message
22. Only difference is...
Edited on Tue Sep-20-05 11:19 AM by KCabotDullesMarxIII
he's a warrior, not a chickenhawk. Could the empathy be imagined - like a child's invisible friend?.

Do I hear Blair asking me, "Why do you hate America?" Don't laugh, but apparently, the Dirty Digger confided in someone that Blair was furious because the BBC reported Katrina with an appreciable measure of honesty, and actually asked DD, "Why do they hate America!!!" I kid you not! I reckon DD was probably in stitches himself.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
BleedingHeartPatriot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:51 AM
Response to Original message
23. WTF! I recommended this, we need to keep it out there for a while.
MKJ
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Joe Chi Minh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:52 AM
Response to Original message
24. Only difference is...
Edited on Tue Sep-20-05 10:55 AM by KCabotDullesMarxIII
his mystical friend is a warrior, not a chickenhawk. Could the empathy be imagined - like a child's invisible friend?.

Would he recognise a "leader of men" in any of the neocons? He'd have to find them within a thousand miles of the battlefield, first, wouldn't he.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
mzteris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:55 AM
Response to Original message
25. even the freeps are freaked.....
lol.......
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
FSogol Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:56 AM
Response to Original message
26. He calls it "Chang"? I though he'd call it "Little Jeb" nt
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
tabasco Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:57 AM
Response to Original message
27. Maybe Chang should visit the Army recruiting office.
Army recruiting short 10,000 recruits this fiscal year.

Did Jebbie ever consider actual military service? Nope. Just lives in his dreams with his warrior friend Chang. That's about as close as any of these silver (coke) spoon cowards come to being in the Army.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
MsTryska Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:14 AM
Response to Original message
28. you know what......jebbie needs to put his sword away
and start attending to those hellions he's given birth too.


Heard one of 'em got popped again for a DUI over the weekend.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
izzybeans Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:29 AM
Response to Original message
29. Chang is quite a probe isn't he? The last of the Deliverance Samurai.
Geesh. Lay off the mushrooms dude. They're best used when not surrounded by right wing loonies and their weapons. Jeb Bush, and his psychodelic anal beads, has blasted compassionate conservatism into another dimension.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
berni_mccoy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:37 AM
Response to Original message
30. Maybe Jeb takes over the title of Cukoobananas?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
July Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:42 AM
Response to Original message
32. Anybody remember Hillary getting pilloried for her "talks" w/
Eleanor Roosevelt?

I get it. IOKIYAR.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
progressoid Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:47 AM
Response to Original message
33. Whaaa? Maybe Rush or Sean can 'splain what the fuck that's all about!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DemocracyInaction Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:50 AM
Response to Original message
34. I loved to play dress up when I was a kid too--looks like these
two wack jobs still love to do it. Georgie wants to play in the "fighter pilot" outfit and Jebbie wants to pretend he's a Japanese warrior. Maybe there just practicin' for Halloween when Babs will take them around Trick or Treating. They seem to like the trick part but don't like "treating". What I want to know is why didn't he hand the guy a "cross" in that they profess to be such warriors for Christ!! (I'd be ashamed to have these two utter assholes as my sons.............).
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Historic NY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 11:58 AM
Response to Original message
36. Humm.....what does Dr. Sigmund Freud say about that.....
Dr. Freud thought it was abnormal. So Jebby is so child-like he needs an imaginary friend to help him cope. Strange indeed, the Bush family.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
sabra Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 03:11 PM
Response to Reply #36
40. very strange... :-)
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
corbett Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 05:27 PM
Response to Original message
42. Hang Onto This Story For 2008 When He Runs For VP
I stand by my prediction that he will be McCain's runningmate for the Republican presidential ticket.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Arkana Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 05:30 PM
Response to Original message
43. Just once, I want to see Dubya flip out at a press conference
and scream "I'M UNLEASHING THE MIGHT OF CHANG!"
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
satya Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 06:38 PM
Response to Reply #43
44. LOL! I force myself to watch his speeches just to see him lose it. n/t
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
hootinholler Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 09:25 PM
Response to Original message
46. I'll see your chang and raise you
A Cheech and Chong.

That ought to get the joint buzzin!

:hippie:

-Hoot
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Vinnie From Indy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 09:29 PM
Response to Original message
47. When Jeb and his family aren't sucking "Chang" dry of his wisdom
and courage, you can be sure they have him doing the laundry.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
CantGetFooledAgain Donating Member (635 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 09:38 PM
Response to Original message
48. I love the fact that the mystical warrior "Chang"...
...also just happens to be a conservative. I've got a hunch that that ol' Chang is dead set against the "death tax", and that he thinks that state and local authorities should have handled Katrina by themselves...

Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Bluebear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 09:46 PM
Response to Original message
49. Yeah, yeah, every guy has a pet name for it.
:evilgrin:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
QC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 09:47 PM
Response to Original message
50. How about Noelle's mystical warrior friend, Xanax?
When will we hear more about her?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Jawja Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 09:50 PM
Response to Original message
51. Jeb Bush is
a PAGAN??? (gasp!!)

:wow:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
AnnieBW Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 09:54 PM
Response to Original message
52. He's a Kloset Klingon
Edited on Tue Sep-20-05 09:55 PM by AnnieBW
And this is his General Chang (From Star Trek VI)



I'd love to see Jeb in a turtlehead! Qa'pla!
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Cha Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:07 PM
Response to Original message
53. Could jeebie be any more of
a farce? Could he possibly be anymore of a caricature of a sleaze gluttonous politician, fleecing the great brainwashed outta their life savings?

bush could only have zero like him for a brother. poppy and babs should be indicted for unleashing unholy shit on the Planet Earth.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Straight Shooter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:34 PM
Response to Original message
54. I've heard some horsesh*t in my life, but this just about beats all.
A conservative mystical warrior? How low does the bush IQ go? :eyes:
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
GarySeven Donating Member (898 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:37 PM
Response to Original message
55. Ca mon you guys - don't you remember his DAD saying that?
The first President Bush used that line all the time. Is there anyone on this board older than 19?
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Fire Walk With Me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Sep-20-05 10:39 PM
Response to Original message
56. One of these is not like the other.
"moral values"
"free society"
"conservative warrior"

Please tell me this is something that won't pass the snopes test.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
tlsmith1963 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 09:18 AM
Response to Original message
58. He's Nuts, & it's *Okay*?!!
Geez, if I publicly said anything like that, I would be hauled off to the loony bin right now. But since all the neocons are crazy, it's perfectly okay for Jeb.:crazy:

Tammy
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
Blackwater Donating Member (33 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 09:34 AM
Response to Original message
59. His brother has been known to seek guidance from supernatural beings too
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
ProfessorPlum Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 09:55 AM
Response to Original message
61. Maybe Jeb thinks he is "Eng"
this seems like really odd behavior.
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
rniel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-21-05 10:38 AM
Response to Original message
62. Can I strangle "chang"
n/m
Printer Friendly | Permalink |  | Top
 
DU AdBot (1000+ posts) Click to send private message to this author Click to view 
this author's profile Click to add 
this author to your buddy list Click to add 
this author to your Ignore list Thu May 02nd 2024, 12:48 AM
Response to Original message
Advertisements [?]
 Top

Home » Discuss » Archives » General Discussion (Through 2005) Donate to DU

Powered by DCForum+ Version 1.1 Copyright 1997-2002 DCScripts.com
Software has been extensively modified by the DU administrators


Important Notices: By participating on this discussion board, visitors agree to abide by the rules outlined on our Rules page. Messages posted on the Democratic Underground Discussion Forums are the opinions of the individuals who post them, and do not necessarily represent the opinions of Democratic Underground, LLC.

Home  |  Discussion Forums  |  Journals |  Store  |  Donate

About DU  |  Contact Us  |  Privacy Policy

Got a message for Democratic Underground? Click here to send us a message.

© 2001 - 2011 Democratic Underground, LLC