How Republicans Will Handle 'Plame Game' (Satire)

just stumbled on this:

http://www.mediabistro.com/fishbowlDC/newspapers/how_republicans_will_handle_plame_game_27135.asp

How Republicans Will Handle 'Plame Game'

...at least according to ABC's "The Note," which published a fake internal Republican memo on how to deal with this Fitzgerald/Miller/Rove/Libby mess.


In fact, over the weekend a secret, FAKE memo went to the White House from some of the best strategic minds in Republican politics (Note: no, it didn't.). Obtained exclusively by The Note late Sunday night (except for the fact that it is NOT real), the memo makes it clear that there is a lot of thought going into how to be ready in case Fitzgerald indicts top White House aides.

Here is the full text (of a SATIRE of a memo that doesn't exist, but with reportorial meaning embedded throughout):

TO: Andy Card, Karen Hughes, Karl Rove, Dan Bartlett, Nicolle Wallace

FROM: Mike Deaver, Chris LaCivita, Ralph Reed

DATE: 10/15/2005

RE: preparing for the worst


1. Finishing the opposition research on Fitzgerald, Judy Miller, and Matt Cooper is essential. We think it is still an open question how you should put that out, but the RNC seems like the best idea of those suggested. The press is obsessed with divisions at the New York Times and we can use that to obscure things for a bit.

2. Definitely also finish the research on past presidential pardons. Those precedents will be invaluable.

3. The public hates how much money these prosecutors spend, so comb through the Fitzgerald disbursements and see if any of his deputies have been staying at the Ritz, etc.

4. We are going to need some Democrats to decry the politics of personal destruction and the criminalization of politics. Try Breaux, Lieberman, Begala, and Lanny Davis. And Zell Miller.

<snip>
10. Bring back Cindy Sheehan -- any way you can, as fast as you can.

<snip>
12. In case of indictments, the President needs a more confident and consistent answer to "WDHKAWDHKI" (as we like to call "what did he know..."). He needs to make one statement that acknowledges he discussed the matter but makes it clear he knew nothing about the gory details. Then stick with it. We can calibrate it at the last minute to see if we want to show distance from Karl. The White House press corps will argue that indictments mean that you can finally discuss the case; you need to point out to them resolutely that the case is ongoing as long as there are pending legal cases.

..lots more...