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Kansas School Board Adopts Geocentric Model of the Universe

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Sandpiper Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 07:41 PM
Original message
Kansas School Board Adopts Geocentric Model of the Universe
Disassociated Press - TOPEKA, KS

On the heels of their move to downplay evolutionary theory, the Kansas Board of Education has made another bold move. The Board voted unanimously to return to teaching an Earth-centered model of the universe, or Geocentric model.

When asked about the decision to replace Copernicus's venerable Heliocentric model, Board member John Bacon (R, Olathe) had this to say:

"The only true source of knowledge is the Bible. And if you look in Joshua 10, the Good Lord commanded the Sun to stand in its place so the children of Israel could smite Gibeon."

"Now, it don't take no genius to figure out that if it was the earth movin', God Almighty would have told it to stand in its place."

The Kansas Board is currently debating whether to add a disclaimer to books that teach the earth is round.



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MadHound Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 07:43 PM
Response to Original message
1. Do you write for the Onion? You should!
:rofl:
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Sandpiper Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 07:50 PM
Response to Reply #1
7. Thanks
:evilgrin:
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lildreamer316 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 07:44 PM
Response to Original message
2. I almost actually thought you were serious.
That's because I wouldn't put it past them. Sheesh.
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Swamp Rat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 07:45 PM
Response to Original message
3. Flat Earth Society
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Fire Walk With Me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 07:47 PM
Response to Original message
4. Breaking: Kansas school board find that all around them is dark.
There is a smell of digested food, with a tinge of methane. There is no light at all, much evidence of e. coli bacteria.
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mohinoaklawnillinois Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 07:48 PM
Response to Original message
5. As I sat watching this story on the NBC Nightly News tonight
with Mr. Wonderful, my comment was this: "This country's going to hell in a handbasket".

I was taught biology in a Catholic high school in the late 1960's by a nun who wholeheartedly believed in evolution.

I'd love to see some of these fundie wingnuts try and have a discussion with Sister Eucharia, she'd clean their clocks.
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shockingelk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 07:48 PM
Response to Original message
6. Alabama to restore Pi to traditional Biblical value
HUNTSVILLE, Ala. — NASA engineers and mathematicians in this high-tech city are stunned and infuriated after the Alabama state legistature narrowly passed a law yesterday redefining pi, a mathematical constant used in the aerospace industry. The bill to change the value of pi to exactly three was introduced without fanfare by Leonard Lee Lawson (R, Crossville), and rapidly gained support after a letter-writing campaign by members of the Solomon Society, a traditional values group. Governor Guy Hunt says he will sign it into law on Wednesday.

The law took the state's engineering community by surprise. "It would have been nice if they had consulted with someone who actually uses pi," said Marshall Bergman, a manager at the Ballistic Missile Defense Organization. According to Bergman, pi is a Greek letter that signifies the ratio of the circumference of a circle to its diameter. It is often used by engineers to calculate missile trajectories.

Prof. Kim Johanson, a mathematician from University of Alabama, said that pi is a universal constant, and cannot arbitrarily be changed by lawmakers. Johanson explained that pi is an irrational number, which means that it has an infinite number of digits after the decimal point and can never be known exactly. Nevertheless, she said, pi is precisly defined by mathematics to be "3.14159, plus as many more digits as you have time to calculate".

"I think that it is the mathematicians that are being irrational, and it is time for them to admit it," said Lawson. "The Bible very clearly says in I Kings 7:23 that the alter font of Solomon's Temple was ten cubits across and thirty cubits in diameter, and that it was round in compass."

Lawson called into question the usefulness of any number that cannot be calculated exactly, and suggested that never knowing the exact answer could harm students' self-esteem. "We need to return to some absolutes in our society," he said, "the Bible does not say that the font was thirty-something cubits. Plain reading says thirty cubits. Period."

Science supports Lawson, explains Russell Humbleys, a propulsion technician at the Marshall Spaceflight Center who testified in support of the bill before the legislature in Mongtomery on Monday. "Pi is merely an artifact of Euclidean geometry." Humbleys is working on a theory which he says will prove that pi is determined by the geometry of three-dimensional space, which is assumed by physicists to be "isotropic", or the same in all directions. "There are other geometries, and pi is different in every one of them," says Humbleys. Scientists have arbitrarily assumed that space is Euclidean, he says. He points out that a circle drawn on a spherical surface has a different value for the ratio of circumfence to diameter. "Anyone with a compass, flexible ruler, and globe can see for themselves," suggests Humbleys, "its not exactly rocket science."

Roger Learned, a Solomon Society member who was in Montgomery to support the bill, agrees. He said that pi is nothing more than an assumption by the mathematicians and engineers who were there to argue against the bill. "These nabobs waltzed into the capital with an arrogance that was breathtaking," Learned said. "Their prefatorial deficit resulted in a polemical stance at absolute contraposition to the legislature's puissance."

Some education experts believe that the legislation will affect the way math is taught to Alabama's children. One member of the state school board, Lily Ponja, is anxious to get the new value of pi into the state's math textbooks, but thinks that the old value should be retained as an alternative. She said, "As far as I am concerned, the value of pi is only a theory, and we should be open to all interpretations." She looks forward to students having the freedom to decide for themselves what value pi should have.

Robert S. Dietz, a professor at Arizona State University who has followed the controversy, wrote that this is not the first time a state legislature has attempted to redifine the value of pi. A legislator in the state of Indiana unsuccessfully attempted to have that state set the value of pi to three. According to Dietz, the lawmaker was exasperated by the calculations of a mathematician who carried pi to four hundred decimal places and still could not achieve a rational number. Many experts are warning that this is just the beginning of a national battle over pi between traditional values supporters and the technical elite. Solomon Society member Lawson agrees. "We just want to return pi to its traditional value," he said, "which, according to the Bible, is three."


http://www.snopes.com/religion/pi.htm
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TallahasseeGrannie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 08:10 PM
Response to Original message
8. Bring me up to date
does this satire mean that they are actually going to teach ID in Kansas? I haven't had time to get much news today.
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Sandpiper Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 10:12 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. Yes
Check LBN and you'll find the actual story.

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Maestro Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Nov-08-05 10:33 PM
Response to Original message
10. Gawd dernit!
I was fuming at this crap until I noticed the disclaimer. Good job. You got me!
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