My apologies to Queen Fans and strict Christians.

(This threads title got me humming a tune, which brewed some fake lyrics. Then muriel_volestrangler said I should make it it's own thread, so here it is. Tidied up some phrases, too.)

NeoCon Rhapsody
- a satirical re-write by Ready4Change

Was there a Jesus?
Is he just fantasy?
Just a Dogmatic
Escape from reality?

Obey your boss,
Nail Christ to a cross,
And pray!

He's just the Lords Son,
With advice and empathy,

He humbled rich,
Healed a few,
Turned his cheek,
Love that Jew!

Any bad that you do,
He absolves all your sin!

Your sin.

(piano)

Mama, just wrote a song.
With blasphemous lyrics,
Just to piss off a few hicks.
Mama, it was just a post!
But pickup trucks are circling my house.

Mama! Heeelllllpp!
Please call out the cops!
These nutjobs are getting out their guns.

(guitar)

Too late,
They've kidnapped me.
Took me to "Camp Love Thy God"
Instructing me with cattle prods.
But it's not torture,
It's called "find the truth,"
Just wish they'd tell me what they want to hear.

Mama! Ooooooooow!
They're forcing me to pray.
They've proven who gave Christ all of those thorns.

(guitar riff)
(piano)

I see a tiny little shadow of a man,
Mr. Bush! Mr. Bush! We call you Presidento'
Shock and Awe! The fighting! Based on very frightening THINGS!
Mr. Cheney! (Mr. Rumsfeld)
Mr. Cheney! (Mr. Rumsfeld)
Mr. Cheney where'd you go? Undisclosed!

Bush is an average guy, beloved don't you know.
(Born of privilege, with a spoon up his nose.
Spoiled every day of his rich, wasted life!)
With or against us, To Iraq we go!
Pre-Emptive! Go! (Don't think we should go) Here we go!
Pre-Emptive! (Don't think we should go) Here we go!
Pre-Emptive! (Don't think we should go) Here we go!
(Don't think we should go) Here we go!
(Don't think we should go)
Go. No. Go! NO! Go! OH! NO!
Mother dear?
Mother Dear?
Mother why'd I have to die?

There are Devils waiting for NeoCons in Hell.
In Hell. In HELL!

(head banging guitars)

So you think you can smear me, and spit in my eye?
So you think you can screw me and spew all these lies?
Not this time! Can't escape from it this time!
Gonna get you out - Impeach your ass right out of here.

(instrumental)

This has always mattered,
Hindsight settles it.
Jesus was only human,
And Evangelicals. Are. Shiiiiiiiiit.

Understand what they've done?

Freddie!!!!! Make that song!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

but don't quit your day job kid...

oi vey!

Part time retail would pay more than doing something like this once in a blue moon.

:)

(How often ARE blue moons, anyway?)

Because they are typically lame and I rarely recognize the song they are set to. However, this is an exception.

Thanks for the mental image of Wayne and Garth banging their heads to this.

But their head banging moment is classic.

Bravo.

I promise, no dangerous chemicals (Mercury or otherwise) were used in the production of this ditty.

(Unless you include caffiene and sugar. :hangover: )

This is a great example of not the brilliant or the satiric but of dumping on people who believe in Jesus Christ. I am Evangelical. I am proud of my faith.

I can't for the life of me figure out why supposedly tolerant DUers think they have the right to trash en entire religion based solely on the bad acting of some of its supposed adherents.

The abolitionist movement was a Christian movement. Perhaps the greatest american of the last century, Martin Luther King was a Christian. Look at the work of Jimmy Carter... based wholly upon his Evangelical belief in the hope of Christ. Look at the Freedom Riders in th South in the Sixties. Look at the Christians who protested against the Vietnam experience. Look at the American Markyknoll nuns who were butchered in Salvador for standing with Archbishop Romero and Gustavo Gutierrez. Look at the hundred of thousands of churches who build homes for Habitat. Who opened their doors for Katrina victims. Look at the American Friends Service Committee.

Look at who protested in Groton when Electric Boat was build a Trident to be named the Corpus Christi. Look at the White Christians who went into Newark in the days after the King assassination.

Look at who is protesting today at the gates of Gitmo.

How dare you lump us into one mass and call Evangelicals "shiiit"

Stop behaving like a junior High Bully... Punching smaller kids in the arm. It is asinine...offensive, naively intolerant, bigoted and pretty much as bigoted as some of the crap that comes out of Virginia Beach and Lynchburg.

You don't seem the least bit more enlightened then they are.

however I have not yet heard a collective denouncement from Christian communities against Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, and others of thier ilk who eagerly pass judgement and condemnation on others, and spread a thinly veiled message of hate against those who do not accept their dangerous apocalyptic interpretation of Christianity while stripping the country of its protections of religious freedom all the while living a life of selfish materialistic decadence. Maybe when some REAL Christian leaders speak out against these false prophets you won't suffer being associated with them.

They are the ones drawing the line in the sand. They are the ones out there loudly defining Christianity for you. They are pushing for school prayer, creationism taught as science, government endorsement through public displays of religion, and the banning of biotech research that can save lives. Its their War on Christmas not ours. They want a theocratic country run under their guidelines. They are in our face and have recieved no opposition from other Christians that is even worth mentioning. So get mad at us if you like, we are making our stand against those creeps to preserve our freedom... you have yet to make yours.

You get to hose the rest of us with your venom because what...we are in the way??

Look the Protestant faith is practically atomized in this country...There is no Rome in Protestantism. for the Most part there is not much the denomimational structure can do about these clowns because they are submitted to no one other then themselves.

So there is no on who can stand up and say enough is enough...If you read Jimmy Carter Latest book you might get an inkling of how evangelicals differ from fundies not simply on poilitcal issues but on theoology and tactics.

The thing about it is... to be CHrist-like we can not....we must not use their tactics. We do not want polical power we do not want want to rule people lives. what we wand is the Gospel of Christ to be hard again....we want out churches back. but we are not going to take it back publically because...well it would detract from the message of Christ.

It is a principled deciusion not to fight in public. Hard to rationalize at some levels I realize...but there are important issues involved. It would be bloody mess and alot of people would suffer within our community.


In the meantime, I drive the fundies nuts with being an evangelical lefty. And I convert one at a time. Sorry if that is too long a process for you.


In the meantime lines like "Jesus was humand and evangelical are SHiiit....is patently offensive. and has nothing to do with fundy politics.

And it is an expression of my personal beliefs. I think Jesus would be appalled at someone who used his name as cover for their misdeeds.

Certainly not all Evanglelicals fall under that statement. But a few certainly do. Ex: To make war against a nation for the crimes of a few zealots? That is not the act of a true Christian, in my opinion. Yet it is being done. Right now. That is the sort of thing I was referring to in parts of my little ditty.

But the fundies are the problem not the evangelicals. and then you offend al Christians by denying the deity of Christ.. Which is your right to do, no question...but you attack the religion as a whole when your complaint is with the only a small albeit powerful and loud group within Christianity.

Perhaps you did not mean it that way but that is what you said.. It is offensive, and comes across as bigoted bullying.

I am as free to express my opinions and beliefs as you are to express the offense you feel. We are both also free to practice our beliefs as we see fit. These are some of the, as yet, still great things about our nation.

But there's nothing in there that says we are free of ever being offended at what someone else says. And that makes sense. Whenever someone speaks regarding issues of importance of controversy, someone else is likely to be offended.

The only way to avoid offense is silence, and that's not free speech anymore.

My brush could be seen as too wide It was meant to be targetted on those who use Christ as an all purpose eraser and excuse to do whatever selfishness or bigotry they please, rather than those who take in his life as an example to strive for.

Half of my apology in the very subject line was for that exact purpose.

nice post :thumbsup:

I think any grouping of people has a few like that. I wish them, and all of you, well this season.

than anything that i have anything seen. Its ole good natured fun knows ones getting nailed to the cross or being killed in a holy war after all in this thread. Sides Jesus himself has to have a sense a humour how else do you explain why sponges grow in the ocean. That just kills me.Oh heres a good one for you.

Now I lay me down to sleep
A bag of peanuts at my feet
If I shall die before I wake
give them to my brother Jake,

:D Have fun and dont let the fundies bite.

I am one of those people who typically stays silent about my personal beliefs and opinions out of fear of offending. So, when I do step out and do something like this I don my thick skin and prepare to turn the other cheek like a spinning top.

I pulled up this song to sign along for the full effect. Good job! :headbang: :yourock:

I did it mostly from memory of how the real deal goes. So I imagine I goofed in some spots.

Ah well. It was a "thing of the moment" type deal.

But Freddie's slightly mad...

:evilgrin:

Honestly. Treading on some people music is literaly treading on their beliefs. Something to be done lightly, and with what respect one can muster.

Regarding Freddie, I admit to like Queens music, but not being a rabid fan. I've no idea what he would have thought of such a spoof, no matter how good I might think my intentions. i've no idea if he had a sense of humour or was a deadly serious artist. Or, more likely, some combination.

Beyond that, I hope I didn't screw up the rhythm of the song. While I tried (briefly) to get the phrasing to fit what I recalled of the tune, I would not be surprised if a goofed in several spots. Were I a musician (I'm definitely not) that kind of technical error would bother me more than someone taking good natured liberties with the song in the first place.

So, my personal, direct apologies to Freddie and his memory. I meant no harm.

from one of the last songs they did "I'm going slightly mad"

I have it in my photobucket account.

I'm sure as long as you meant it in fun, Freddie would have been up for it. He just wanted everyone to be happy anyway.

No worries. :hug:

I get down and too serious at times. I'll try to lighten up a bit myself.

HE'S EN FUEGO!!!

:puke:

Clever stuff, R4C.
The Professor

Seems a number of people found amusement in it, and that's mostly what I was going for.