"Kids not Allowed to Utter Words with 'X' in Them"

(I just wrote this in another O'Reilly thread. I thought I'd give it it's own thread, just to see if you like it.)

School children across the country have been forbidden to used words containing the letter 'X' for fear of offending non-Christians at Yuletide. As you know, the letter 'X' has been used to abbreviate the word Christmas, i.e. X-Mas. School board superintendent Wally Wallibahbah has declared no student may use the letter 'X' while on government property, either orally, or in writing. 'We do not want to make non-Christians feel uncomfortable and so we feel this is the best policy,' Wallibahbah said. Now, all school districts across this Christian nation have followed suit.

Who's next, WalMart? Will Extra Savings become Etra Savings? Folks, you know convicted criminals, bankrupt families, atheists, agnogstics and overzealous Puritans founded this country with one thing in mind, CHRISTMAS! Our founding fathers crossed freezing oceans, sat down to dinner on the last Thursday in November with Indians and ate with their hands, no less, in order that we would be able to experience the joy of dragging dead trees into our homes, of driving ourselves deep into debt in order to buy the latest whatzamajigger, and propping up our low t.v. ratings with superficial rants about nothing. It's important we preserve these traditions in order to honor the people who died before us - for example, during the witch trials and hence. It's like the war on Iraq, People. We must continue to honor the people we have sent to their deaths there, by sending more. It's tradition and it's important to our national integrity. We are Christians, people. Get used to it! You don't like it? Leave! Go back to your flea-infested sandpiles and take your ragtops with you. We will burn you at the stake. We will drown you. We will torture you until you accept the Lord Jesus Christ as your kind and loving Savior. We will hang you by the neck. We will inject you with poisons. We will electrify your reproductive parts until you accept the Prince of Peace and learn the words to Noel. This is America and we won't stand for this anymore. It's X-Mas, darn-it! It's X-Mas!"

Bill O'Leilly

Xmas (or X-mas) is an abbreviation for Christmas. It is derived from the word ΧΡΙΣΤΟΣ, transliterated as Christos, which is Greek for Christ. Greek is the language in which the whole New Testament was written.

Originally, in "Xmas", X represented the Greek letter χ (see chi). It was pronounced with an aspirated , which is the first letter of Christ's name in Greek. However, because an upper-case χ has the same shape as a Latin alphabet letter X, many people who do not know the history assume that this abbreviation is meant to "take Christ out of Christmas" as a means of secularization or a vehicle for political correctness.

The occasionally seen belief that the X represents the cross Christ was crucified on has no basis in fact; St Andrew's Cross is X-shaped, but Christ's cross was probably shaped like a T or a †. Indeed, X-as-chi was associated with Christ long before X-as-cross could be. The use of X as an abbreviation for cross in modern abbreviated writing (e.g. "Kings X" for "Kings Cross") may have reinforced this assumption.

What I wrote, however, was purely tongue-in-cheek. I hope you didn't take it seriously... ?

He went on and on about "Xmas" taking the "Christ" out of Christmas. I felt like screaming at him.

X = Christ and has been since the New Testament was written.

In fact, it was used for centuries as a "code" by which persecuted (I mean REALLY persecuted) Christians could secretly recognize each other.

. . . I thought it was for real. How weird of a time do we live in when that can happen?

God, where does this shit end....

I think we should just start saying "Shut Up!" A terse reply to a non-issue.
The Professor

It's been ruined for this year and probably for the foreseeable future.:(

I bet this is the excuse their using so they don't have to fork over $300 for a video game.

Now, "falafel" is another thing altogether!

You know, Wolverine, Cyclops, Professor Christ, and all the rest.

Or if they're in band class and have to play something on the Christophone?

Does that mean that the seminal early 1980s punk album "Los Angeles" is actually by Jesus?

"Lookit what them dam LIBURALS have done! why, they CROSSED CHRIST OUT OF CHRISTMAS!!!! Holy sweet Mary Mutha o' GAWD! It's CHRISTmas, dammit! NOT 'Echs-mas'!"

"And remembuh, Friends, FIGHTING over JEEBUS is the REASON for the SEASON!"

The cops brought a homeless woman in and asked me to "pat her down." I will never forget her for two reasons, one she had to use folded up newspaper as a sanitary napkin and it was hard as a brick. It still hurts me to think about it. And, two, when I approached her to do the "pat down" she looked me in the eye and said with a sharp snarl, "Don't you touch me! I'm a fucking Christian!" Of course, I had to do my job. When I finished she said, "Merry Christmas, Bitch."

I love odd juxtapositions!