SweetZombieJesus, HOW ARE YOU??? (kick this!)

All our good karma and prayers are with you, my friend!

We share your pain, and the DU family is here for you!

Love,

Rick (and Janet)

:kick:

I've been thinking about you all day-- and I don't even know you! But, my heart goes out to you and your family and I hope you will let us know if you need anything. (((((SWJ))))

I've been gone for a few days, so fill me in please.

:kick:

Hope he's as well as can be expected...

:-(

maybe he's taking some time away from the computer...whatever it takes to find some peace.

You take care, OK? We care.

UGRR

Stay strong.

what with the revelations of his ex's passing before this out of the blue passing of his dad...I just feel very sorry .

a lot of pain over losing his ex, then, suddenly, lost his dad. DU is the best to be thinking of this, and him. I have thought of him, off and on, since last night. I hope that he can make it through this. I have faced it, myself, and I don't know if I have yet.:shrug:

We are thinking of you, SweetZombieJesus, and sending strong and positive thoughts. He will come back to us when he's ready, I'm sure. He's got a lot on his plate, just now.:-(

Sending you strength, SZJ.

Your DU family all share in your grief.

Just got up, and I actually got some sleep, and so did my mom, thank God. My friend Toby called late last night so he should be here sometime today, it'll be good to see him.

This morning, we have to decide what clothes we're going to bring to the funeral parlor for him to wear. The funeral director suggested a suit at first, but that wasn't dad's style. I kind of wanted to put him in the Neil Young t-shirt I bought when we all four went to the concert at Red Rocks, as sort of a takeoff on that old Ronnie Van Zandt legend, and because it was the last family vacation we had. Neil Young's music always meant a lot to me, but it's going to mean so much more now. I keep singing the words to "Tonight's The Night" in my head with my dad's name instead of Bruce Berry's.

It's getting easier every day, but it still hurts a lot. Does anyone remember that post I made a couple months ago about my political heroes, and how my dad was one? This was the man who taught me to question authority, to decide things for myself and find my own way, and he would always let me watch George Carlin and Richard Pryor specials with him, even when I was little. I owe so much of what I am to him.

Thanks again to everyone for their good wishes. I'll be saving them all and printing them out for mom sometime. Who knows, maybe I'll get her to join the forum? Might be good for her.

If he wasn't the suit type, put him in something respectable but comfortable. Otherwise, you will feel "strange," like he won't be able to rest. My dad was cremated, but we got him just an ordinary box, if we had got him a fancy urn, I swear he would have risen and told us to take it back.

There is an old joke about this: "If I were buried in that, I would rise up and change my clothes." You will now find that to be true; if your dad wouldn't be "rested" in a suit, he won't seem to be now.

Take care, guy; I know a little about what you are going through because I still am.

((((SZJ)))
((((ZW)))) from Laurel

ZombyWoof and I are not related, we just find our personalities eerily similar. Frankly, I'm flattered if that's what you thought, but it's not the case. My brother doesn't do the discussion board thing, unfortunately.

Thanks so much for telling us more about him. He obviously did a great job with you. Again, I am so very sorry.;(

You sound like you're very focused and coping well. Now, you still have things that you need to do for him. I found that the hard part, after I lost my dad, was when there was suddenly nothing left to do. I wish I had DU back then. Fortunately, you do have DU, and I know everyone will be looking for you and sending good thoughts your way.

It would be great to meet your mom.:-)

(it is amazing the support people can get here!)

I am glad your friend will be arriving. My sympathies to you and your family.

Well, we had the viewing for the family about an hour ago, and it was really hard. They lightened his moustache, and I would rather they hadn't, but it's not something I feel like being pissed about. I was griping a bit about the fact that his irresponsible sister still hasn't shown up when I called her yesterday morning, but she's coming tomorrow, so she'll just have to go see him with the rest of the "public".

There is TONS of food around here, but nothing to eat. Sometimes it's hard being the most picky eater on earth ;-)

We're having a lot of fun talking and laughing with the family, but thankfully we don't feel guilty about it. We all need it bad.

Funny story: We were watching I Love The 70s, and they were talking about Squeaky Fromme trying to shoot Ford, and my cousin Lacy said "Squiggy tried to kill Gerald Ford?" Everyone laughed, and then I did an impression of Squiggy going up to Ford and going "Hellooo" and shooting him. Probably doesn't translate as well in the writing, but it was funny to me, and provided a much needed laugh.

We were going over mom's financial state earlier, and from the looks of it, things will be ok. She's got a 401K she can cash out early, since she can't draw on dad's pension till she's 60 (she's only 46), and I guess there's a CD in the bank that my Grandma left my dad, so we're still trying to find out if she'll get that automatically, since dad didn't have a will or anything. Looks like the railroad (Union Pacific) pays out either a $10,000 or $20,000 life insurance policy to mom, and that should help with the funeral costs and thensome.

I'm finally starting to relax. Most of the stuff I had to be strong for is taken care of, so for now and most of tomorrow at least, it's time to just relax and be with the family. There's tons of us here, so we're never alone.

Thanks again for everyone's kind words and wishes. Mom will like to read them when she's ready.

I went through the same thing 6 months ago with my Mom and it's never easy.

If I can help in any way, please feel free to PM me.

Worrying about money on top of everything else is a terrible thing to have to do, but necessary. It looks like your mom will be OK in that area, I'm glad about that.

Thanks for checking in like this...we all appreciate that you are going through a very difficult time, & it is considerate of you to let us know what's happening. Peace.

i was out if state yesterday and missed the original thread. just want ya to know to hang in there, my thoughts are with ya!!

Remembering the good times helps and it will get your through but If you need someone to talk to we are here for you.


Bless Your Heart!

Everything you said brought back memories for me. I remember the incredible amount of food. The fridge was totally jammed. This was good, as I just didn't have the energy for cooking, though I usually enjoy it. I used to cook for my dad.

We had a family viewing the first day, also. My mother had decided on a closed casket, so I had to enlist a friend's help in enlarging a good photo of my dad. He died on a Friday afternoon, so much was closed when we needed to do things. It turns out that he looked so like himself that we had an open casket. I had trouble leaving him there, that first night, as it was a strange place.

I also remember the family and the laughter. My cousin, who is the closest thing I have to a sister, and I kept collapsing with fits of the giggles. I think it was a reaction to the tension and the exhaustion. I didn't feel like I could sleep.

Thanks for getting back to us, SweetZombieJesus. I'm especially glad to know that your mom will be okay, financially. My thoughts are with you.

Rhiannon

Mom's playing with the little guys right now, and she's laughing and doing good. I'm glad to see her like this. We just watched the Monk from last night that she taped, and she laughed a lot at it. Braden, the four year old, made a drawing for her, and he gave her a hug, and she loved it. It's great to have so much family here.

Anyway, hope no one thinks I'm attention whoring with this thing, just wanted everyone who was worried and stuff to get an update.

I'm making a Paul Simon album right now to listen to. I heard Kodachrome for the first time the other day and I can't get it out of my head, and since all I have of his is Graceland, I thought I'd make another one, the self-titled album from 72, since mom says its good.

... you've been through a lot and we're glad to be there for you.

As far as Paul Simon goes, I think everybody should own/hear Rhythm of the Saints. Amazing album, incredibly underrated.

And I have a REALLLLY good rare remix of Boy in the Bubble that was released as a B-side years ago. If you want me to send an mp3 you're way, lemme know.

From Otis to you:

Sittin' in the mornin' sun
I'll be sittin' when the evenin' come
Watching the ships roll in
And then I watch 'em roll away again, yeah

I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm just sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time

I left my home in Georgia
Headed for the 'Frisco bay
'Cause I've had nothing to live for
And look like nothin's gonna come my way

So I'm just gonna sit on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Ooo, I'm sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time

Look like nothing's gonna change
Everything still remains the same
I can't do what ten people tell me to do
So I guess I'll remain the same, yes

Sittin' here resting my bones
And this loneliness won't leave me alone
It's two thousand miles I roamed
Just to make this dock my home

Now, I'm just gonna sit at the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away
Oooo-wee, sittin' on the dock of the bay
Wastin' time

I am so sorry to hear about your dad. My condolences go out to you and your family. (((hugs)))

and support being sent your way. (((hugs)))) You're Dad is an inspiration for us all. And you and your family are his legacy. Peace