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Homeland security has advised that Al Whatever is planning to atteck the political debates with giant radioactive Boston creme pies!
Precise details have not yet been released, but the gist of the plan is to have several operatives hidden in the audiences at debates who will rise up at strategic points in the proceedings and hit the candidates in the faces with pies laced with spent nuclear fuel. They were planning on attacking the first candidate to mispronounce the word "nuclear". Security at the events are legally empowered to tell all attendees to "shut your pie hole" when challenged.
What's *your* fake terror alert? What's it to be? Rubber bands, giant slinkies, rabid wolverines?
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