Bye bye Big Boy....

I am a sap. A really big sap.

This morning, as I got James up and slipped him into a pair of jeans and a Tshirt to take his sister to school, I could almost talk myself into the fact that he was still my little "stay at home with Mommy" boy. We dropped off Sissy, came home and poured his cereal. He sat and ate and talked with me as I folded towels. Just like always. Tick tock reminded the clock...

Quickly, into his room where I had placed his clothes on his desk chair the night before. Eskimo kisses through the neckhole of his shirt, a quick shoe lace tying lesson. Into the bathroom. Toothpaste dribbled on a dark blue polo shirt. "Quick Momma! The wash cloth. THE WASH CLOTH!" A little water on a brush, a dab of gel. Spikey, or nice and neat? Nice and neat is the way to go for a little boy perfectionist. How did he get that way?

Backpack? Check. Camera? Check. Keys? Check. A step to the side of the front door to grab a picture and to the car. We are off. Why didn't anyone tell me that the parking lot is overloaded on the first day of school? And I know a lot of anyones in this school. Who's the idiot who parked his/her idiot truck on a slant. Why I oughta ram.... Hey! there's a spot. Gotta run now.

Into the school. Past the kindergarten room where we both grew to love and admire Mrs Baker. Mrs Baker brought us out of our shell, and kept us from smothering too much. Sniffle...but we must walk past. Around the corner...where is room 9? The little face beside me growing ever more somber and straight as first day first grade fright takes over. "Don't worry...you are gonna love it!" I say this happily quaking with sad tears...

Mrs Russell is bouncing around! Hi hi hi!!! Look here's your locker! We're going to have Fun!!! This is a great day! Whatever you have, bring it on in....

....and he was swept away into a life that includes me on the fringes--I will involve myself as much as I can I say to myself. I leave alone. I walk by Mrs Baker shepherding a new group of Kindergarten babies with a quick wave for me...I walk past the principal's office where Jan, the always suffering secretary shouts out," You moms should be skipping and smiling!" Did she ever have kids...does she now? Do people look forward to this?

I go home...to a house that used to smell of pancakes at this time on a Monday morning, to a living room that doesn't have a makeshift highway for little cars spread out, a backyard with swings that all of sudden look out of place...and then the dog looks up at me. And I realize she needs (NEEDS) to be walked.

Poor Mrs. Grumpy. Great story, though. It must be a wrench to have to let go, but it happens to everyone. The little guy is adorable.


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;) It is a wrench and it came up all to quickly. I wasn't done smothering him yet...:cry:

Beautiful. It reminds me of when I first went off to school. Makes me kinda sad to know those days are gone. :(

grade with his this AM and was doubly sad...Part of me still thinks I'm not supposed to be a grownup yet.

:hug:

I remember those days and would always come home and cry. Ahhh, I just do not know what to say, I wish I could make you feel better. It is so sad when they start to learn life away from us. Yes, others would always have a party the first day of school and I always thought they were nuts. I hated it for a while then adjusted but greeted them the last day of school with yelling, "YAY It is summer and you are mine all mine", and we would proceed to have a party for that. If you feel like talking just send me a PM. I am sorry. BYW, he is a cutie! He also looks happy and excited and that always hurts the most.

yet, so I draw smiley faces) reminding her of her next day off, or sharing a silly joke. I was invited out for celebratory breakfast today and begged off. He was very excited and I know I have to let go... and you are right-that's what hurts the most. :cry:

He is just at the beginning of his journey and he will come home from school every day anxious to show you all he has learned. He will be reading and you will be there to see his mind open, grow and mature on his way to becoming a man.

It is such a good and bad thing-all mushed together. :hi:

My little one started preschool this morning and my oldest started kindergarten.

I am so right there with you.

Your little man is so handsome. He looks like such a big boy! You should be so proud!

Kindergarten I almost had a panic attack in the room. I had to shove my way out so he wouldn't see me sob. MrG thinks I'm round the bend.

He is a big boy, I just don't want him to be...:( Thank you for the compliments!

:hug:

And believe me, I've been looking. I blame Mr. Arnheim. I tell him all the time that if we would have never gotten the oldest her "big girl bed" then none of this would have happened!

Toddler bed for the littlest, then underwear and now preschool...

I am such a big puddle of tears. I try to hide it from hubby.

:hug: right back at you! It's nice to not feel alone.

speak to MrG when he gets home. After all, he was the one who was all for chucking the diapers....

:hi:

See, that's where it starts!! :)

I'm with you MrsGrumpy! I'd rather have them all to myself. :)

Working makes it a bit easier I suppose - not having to go home to a house where I'm used to seeing them. My oldest started first grade this year and already she's waving me off in the morning instead of pleading with me to come in with her. :(

Time goes by too fast... much too fast.

and mine doesn't even go back til Wed.! Takes me back to kindergarten for my little one.

AWWWWW...

I do feel sad when he goes back, but then I go in the kitchen, turn up the rock and roll really loud, and boogie for a while.

:hug: for moms ( he is really cute)

I tried to drag my feet all through last week, knowing this moment was coming.

I must get a radio in my kitchen. I took the dog for a brisk...really brisk to dry the tears...walk.

:hi:

I always feel out of sorts at first, like part of me is gone, although I adjust to the quiet ( and lack of video game explosions). And I only have one. You have all the developmental categories covered with your brood. :)

well, I'll save that for another thread. ;)

my daughter was in K thru 3rd grade and then was able to stay home. To be honest I cry just as much when she starts every year too. :( The little guy will still hold my hand, and hug me...but I'm sure that's just temporary until he sees how his other friends handle it.

They just zip right on up, don't they?

Bitter-sweet, as they say. I don't have kids, but you remind me powerfully of my first days in first grade. God I miss being a kid.

about when one walks around in maternity clothes. I wouldn't trade any of the moments of his (or my daughter's) babyhood for anything. In hindsight, it seems as if I was given only days with them.

I thought this was a nostalgia thread about the lost diner of my youth...

little man anymore...:cry:

You can come up and I'll buy you a Big Boy Combo Zomby! I had thought of that as I posted this thread! :hi:

The first time I was in one, I wasn't even 2. I placed a plate of spaghetti on my head.

week! :hi: Now I really must get back to feeling sorry for myself.

Just wait until he goes off to college.

Or you find out he is a Chicago Bears fan just like his Uncle Zomby taught him.

Please?????

I waited tables there one summer in the late 70s.

The funny thing...I didn't do that with my kids when they were young. I was all excited; we went to the first day of school totally thrilled. It wasn't until the first day of high school for my oldest that I felt this way.

He'd been to "football" camp over the summer. That was already difficult. I'd drop him off, and he was way smaller than anyone else there. I'd spend the morning worrying that the big kids would bully him. But he didn't have a problem.

The first day of high school, he was taking the school bus. We lived rurally; no street lights. It was picking him up at 5am, down our dirt road and across the street. He was the only kid around, so there wasn't anyone else at the bus stop. I made him stop in the living room so I could take his picture; he didn't want me to walk down the dark road and stand in the dark with him to wait. That would be "embarrassing." So I kissed him goodbye and sent him off all by himself, trying to be brave. I watched out the window, but it was too dark to see him. Still, I watched until I saw the lights of the bus pull up to pick him up, and then I sat down and cried.

I thought I'd been brave, and that he had no idea how I felt. He just brought this up last month; we went out to dinner with his brother and their SOs, and he shared the story of mom's "empty nest" panic on the first day of high school, and of how, secretly, he still wanted me to hold his hand on the way to the bus. We both knew that he was somehow walking away from childhood, and into unknown territory. He'll be 27 in 6 weeks.

Definitely spend some time at school with him! The time when they want to go on "all alone" comes only too soon.

:cry: Thanks for sharing that story. That your son remembers this and was able to share his feelings of that day is testament to a job well done by you.

I hope his teacher is as open to classroom helpers as his Kindergarten teacher was, because I really love being there.

:hug:

I am continually surprised by motherhood of adult men. I am so proud of who they are, even when they make poor choices. I am humbled by their self-assuredness, their independence, and their staunch support of their mom. Because I am who I am, they don't worry about me taking care of many things by myself; they know I can handle a lot. But if I say I need them, or if they discern a need on their own, they are right by my side. And when they are discouraged, frustrated, hurt, or need ideas and solutions, who do they come to? They still come to mom; the one trusted with all. Underneath adulthood, independence, and responsibilities, if you know how to look, you can still see my "little" boys.

Your teacher will be glad to have you; I'm still glad when a parent wants to spend time in class with us in 5th grade!

:hi:

Thanks!

-- Allen

:hi:

What a beautiful picture. Such a handsome guy.

My son is in pre-school this year, kindergarten next year. This part of your post almost did me in, "I go home...to a house that used to smell of pancakes at this time on a Monday morning, to a living room that doesn't have a makeshift highway for little cars spread out, a backyard with swings that all of sudden look out of place."

My living room, aka The Construction Site, is always a total mess. We are always dodging trucks and "holes" that have been dug into the middle of the room. Some days it seems like a lot to put up with, but reading your post is just one of those subtle reminders to enjoy the little things while we can.

Hope your days goes well.

It was only a half day today. So I can put off the inevitable one more day.

We all have a different lens through which we experience these landmark moments. As a divorced dad I get much of it through Justin's mom. She does a really good job. She told me she lost it when she opened up his supply bag and saw these little pencils and erasers. I lost it with her.

Its going to be a long and wonderful journey.

I hope the long part of our journey is Loooonnnnnngggg. :hi:

with my second I try to enjo the brilliance of every moment as it happens knowing that it will all be over before we can blink our eyes.

And I could completely see myself doing the same thing if I had a child. :hug:

(I skipped midyear into first grade, so my mom didn't have to endure this particular day)

I am the aforementioned sap! :hi:

I have tears in my eyes. And I'm still two years away from the first day of school with my oldest. Excellent post. It conveys all the feelings of motherhood so well in one moment.

Right now my oldest is playing with his father's old briefcase and pretending to go to "work".

My son had a big plastic tool box that he used to drag around the house and work "like daddy".

Right now there is the sound of trucks rolling overhead...so I am content. :)

enjoy them and cherish your family life. One day he will go off to college and you will wonder why you resisted this little bit of freedom you are now having. He'll be home in a few hours.
But I cried too so I do remember how you feel.

I do it to my fourteen year old too. And sometimes she lets me get away with it and hugs me even. ;)

:hi:

Not really :D But a sweetheart all the same. Lucky mom and lucky boy.

There are a few forgettable moments...but very few! :hi:

I remember my son's first day of kindergarten. I left in tears, first grade was a little easier. Prepare yourself though, each year goes a little faster. My "big boy" just started 8th grade :(.

I am a basket case with these things. I am the person who takes tons of video for everything and then cannot bring myself to watch it. :hi:

just filling out the paper work LAST May for Kindergarten.
Your son is a doll!
God Bless and good days friend.

Thanks a whole bunch and I hope the first year of school goes smoothly.

I cried just as badly on the last day of school as the first. We fell in love with James' teacher. :hi: