So, my former roommate and I had a serious talk yesterday.

He and I talked about some things that had been unmentioned for years. Including the fact, according to Jeff (my former roommate), that my b/f Doug came on to Jeff. Now, Jeff doesn't like Doug at all...I know that.

But this is just bugging the hell out of me. I can't believe this...yet, it's bothering me.

Jeff also brought up, for what seems like the one millionth time, how my life was fucked up prior to my accident in 1997 (where, one Saturday night in February of that year, I was seriously intoxicated and ended up getting hit by said truck. I was walking...I guess stumbling...home. I don't, to this day, remember the details. I got a right hip replacement as a result of the injuries sustained in the accident).

So, after "clearing the air" in our conversation last night with Jeff, I feel like absolute shit. Like I'm completely worthless. I wish I could accept honesty better. I guess I can't deal with it very well.

You don't have to reply to this. I just wanted to put it down in words. I didn't sleep much last night because of this.

Thanks for letting me talk.
Terry

But we don't think you're worthless. :hug:

Obviously I don't know you too well - but, for what I've seen you are anything but worthless. You are funny as hell, intelligent, compassionate and full of love. We all have our shortfallings and we do things we don't mean to - but when our motivations are good we are NEVER worthless.

Hang in there brother!

I would guess Jeff fits into that category. Anyone who brings out this sort of response in you is to be avoided. You seem like a wonderfully caring and sensitive guy - be proud of that, and be proud of what you've accomplished since your accident. :pals:

Tell Jeff to go fark himself.

of a line in the movie, "The Natural": "I believe we have two lives. There's the life you learn with, and the life you live with after that."

What's most important isn't whether Jeff forgives you, but whether you forgive yourself. I hope you do; because you're such a wonderful guy, Terrya... :hug:

By the way, don't forget that Jeff is no more of a saint than anybody else on the earth.

You said that you wish you could accept honesty better, but you said yourself that you guys talked about things that had been unmentioned for years. Facts seem to get distorted over time so just because he said certain things doesn't make them 100% true. And don't ever forget, in our lifestyle if you really want to hurt someone just tell them that their boyfriend came on to you. It happens all the time and is very seldom true. You'll be fine and we're here for you. :-)

To err is human, to forgive, devine.