I miss my wife

It occurred to me recently that I don't even really have anyone to say that to.

So, I'll say it here. It's almost 4 months, and I miss my wife and it hurts alot, and that's that.

:grouphug:

age 46. She was my best friend, ski partner, rafting partner, traveling partner....the Best Bear In The Whole Forest.

I was doing okay for a while this summer but I'm really starting to lose it again.

I still kind of can't believe it.

Shouldn't have posted this - I feel like a f---ing sympathy sponge, but I just needed to say that out loud. Sorry.

:grouphug: :hug: :pals:

it must be very difficult :hug:

if that helps any...I'd just recently wondered where you've been. Please drop by more often, and say whatever you need to. :hug:

Come around here more often, Bear. And post more pictures of your rafting excursions as well.

Hang in there, pal. You've got at least a thousand people in your corner. And THAT is a conservative estimate.

There are probably no words that would be comforting enough. It is a huge void. She has a place that no one else can have. Speaking of it is good and a tribute to her. I guess you just go on as she would want you to...and be happy as she would want. It will take time, from what I have seen in my own experience, many, many months...maybe longer, but she would want you to live a happy life and you must do that for her. Easier said than done, I know!

Check your inbox. :hug:

it has been about a year and a half

and that's that...

I don't know what to say...but I think Dolo said it best.

I had a pretty lousy Wednesday myself. For more info:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x1757068

it may feel like you have bottomed out on a roller coaster, but missing her means that she is still very much with you. That is a sweet thing.
I am so sorry for your loss. It can be hard sometimes but you have the DU folks there for you.

Bigbear, I'm sure it's little comfort, but please know we all hurt for you. You can confide in us and look for comfort here anytime.

We're here for you whenever you need us, big guy. It's the least we can do.

Haele (and Laz)

the loss of your wife. It sounds as though she was quite a wonderful woman.

You'll always miss her and it will always hurt. But time does help make it better. I say that, btw, through too much experience.

I think you did a good thing to post. Having many people think positive thoughts about you and your wife, I believe, helps.

I hope you hang in there and remember the good times. That will help get you though. Also, talk to her.

Please post whatever you need, whenever you need.

Nothing I can say can make you feel better, but you have my total empathy.... Such a loss is truly heartbreaking, please know you have friends here you've never met who can only offer you their help and support through the times ahead...
My heart goes out to you...

I have had you in my thoughts many times in the last few months. I really don't know what to say except hang in there. We need you around here.

Big cyberhug from Skittles for BigBigBear:

((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUG))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

:hug:

Wish you were close enough that I could bring you a piece of my birthday cake and we could sit on the porch and pig out and you could tell me all about her.

Take good care of yourself and don't ever feel like you can't come here and tell us whatever you need to say. :hug:

I hope that you can take some heart in the fact that there are some people on this earth who will forever only WISH that they had a love as strong as yours.

Be a strong Bear, BBB. And ask for sympathy anytime. That's part of being strong. You've got it. :hug:

:hug:

for your loss.

i can't even imagine. my heart aches for you

My wife left me almost a year ago, and i still sometimes cry myself to sleep. You never get over the loss, but you learn to carry on. I don't have many people i can talk to about it too, but i always feel like i'm being an emotional pest if i post anything.... If you ever want to talk... PM me anytime!

Stay strong!

:hug:

My heart goes out to you.

We care.

I cried during your struggle. I'm happy to know you are still with us. You should still mourn but know that we all do too. :hug:

I think there is an anticipation of all the special days coming up over the next three months, and you have a change of seasons now as well. I always get lonesome for my mom at this time of year.
:hug: Hang in there.

sending very good thoughts your way

So sorry for your hurting.

We are all here for you.

:hug:

Four months really isn't that long......:hug:

Here's hoping comfort and peace will be yours again soon....

you are actually healing yourself. Someday you will have more joyful memories than sad ones. The loss will always remain, but what you have gained by loving and being loved is well worth it.
Hang in there, buddy.

I don't know that kind of pain, and I don't want to. Best of luck in your healing.

4 months is nothing - it's still fresh. Of course it hurts a lot: don't even worry about feeling the pain. It's natural and normal and it will come and go, ebb and flow, and just when you think you're coping, it'll overwhelm you. That's the way it goes.

I have no words of comfort - nothing can make you feel better. Just don't question how you feel or put any expectations on yourself to feel differently.

*hugs*

It does get better. You never forget the one's you love nor do you forget how much you loved them. But it does get better. When My wife died I went clinicaly depressed. I wish that I had gotten help then but I didn't. I didn't know any better even though I had a degree in Psychology.

I owned a small drycleaners which ultimately went under; most small businesses (80% or more) go under when the spouse dies. But things were complicated by Mr. Thoms Stewart of Vashon Island(a hot shot repuke who contributed government money to a republican candidate in Washington State) who wanted to put in a fish market in the space I had leased from him.

I wish you grace and peace in the loss of your wife.

I can't imagine what you're going through ... or how much you miss your wife, who sounds like an amazing person.

:hug: :hug: :hug:

You deserve a hug today. It's OK to have the bad days as well as the good days. Just come to DU more often when you have those bad days and a bunch of hugs will be waiting for ya. We don't mind at all! Take care!

I hope time will heal you as well as can be expected.

I am 9 months separated and about three months divorced from mine.... strange thing is..... we're seeing one another again. It's been an up and down roller coaster, crazy... out of this world ride. I TOTALLY know where you're coming from. Good luck and be easy on yourself.

Last night was really tough.

I didn't have a signature line before - I just now made one from her picture and a little message from me in Czech.

I'm glad you added it. :hug:

Take care and please check in with us. :hug:

A wonderful tribute to a wonderful lady.

nm

almost lost mine to cancer and could not IMAGINE what you are going through.

love you bro

I haven't had that experience, but I know I'd be crushed if anything happened to my husband. When my mom died it hurt a lot; but I just can't imagine being without my family.

May you find peace. Missing her just shows how much you loved her. Be good to yourself.

Don't beat yourself up for missing her...it's only been a few months and it sounds like an unexpected death. Hang in there and know you have lots of support at DU and elsewhere.

:hug: :grouphug: We're here for you.

I lost her in 1991. My world became dark for a while. It changed my life's path. Things slowly become less painful. Try to get out and about.

I feel your pain, brother. Take care. :hug:


It took me until today to respond.

Of course you miss her...please share stories with us and celebrate her life.

Think it's harder after all the well wishers have gone away and realizing that you are alone...but you aren't....we are here for you!

:hug:

Say it here whenever you need to.

:hug:

You always have your DU family to say that to...

I can't know your pain directly but the vibrations of love are universal. :hug:

:hug:

You are so lucky to have had her and experienced true love and had it reciprocated. Some people never get that in their whole lives. It must hurt worse than anything else to lose it, but at least you had it. Take care and vent anytime. :hug:

there is nothing wrong with missing her. 4 months is a short time and she died a young age. i can't imagine how it would feel to lose someone so close and so early.

and you can say whatever you want about it on here anytime you want.