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If you could make the rules for the debates, what would you stipulate?

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BurtWorm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 09:56 AM
Original message
If you could make the rules for the debates, what would you stipulate?
Here's mine:

Speaker gets pelted with an egg every time he says "uh" or hesitates or blinks two or more times within two seconds.
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sui generis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 09:59 AM
Response to Original message
1. replace egg with brick and you're on /nt
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BurtWorm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:01 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. Even just a loud buzzer would be effective.
;)
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southpaw Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:02 AM
Response to Original message
3. No Notes, telepromptors or advisors on the premises!
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kick-ass-bob Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:03 AM
Response to Original message
4. No earpieces
or voice simulators (so Bush can't just move his mouth while someone else is talking...)
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Phillycat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:04 AM
Response to Original message
5. Drink while you think.
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Squeech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:06 AM
Response to Original message
6. Fact checkers
The judges from Jeopardy get to weigh in on the accuracy of the debaters' assertions.
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JohnKleeb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:07 AM
Response to Original message
7. Well
You can't call Dick Cheney to answer your question.
You can't poll the audience
and you can't have your answers reduced to the two.
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Lautremont Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:07 AM
Response to Original message
8. Boring debate periodically leavened by
a speeded-up scene of slapstick interaction between the candidates, set to the theme music from "Pee Wee's Big Adventure."
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BurtWorm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:08 AM
Response to Original message
9. Windsurfing segment.
:thumbsup:
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arwalden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:13 AM
Response to Original message
10. Alex Trebek Is Moderator...
"Ooooh... 'Sorrey'! Remember Mr. Bush, all answers must be phrased in the form of an actual FACT!"
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daddybear Donating Member (538 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:20 AM
Response to Original message
11. That Bush....
be given an enema...and buried in a matchbox.
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Phillycat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:23 AM
Response to Original message
12. Bikini competition.
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Briarius Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:26 AM
Response to Original message
13. Team of fact-checkers get to call bullsh*t on any lies
aka anytime chimpy opens his pie-hole
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BurtWorm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-30-04 10:40 AM
Response to Original message
14. From my brother
"I propose that each candidate gets 2 minutes, no more no less, to
answer the moderator's question. If they run out of things to say, the camera must remain on them for the duration of the 2 minute period, at which point a sickly chime will sound. The opponent then gets 1:30, no more, no less. Again, if they have said all they need to say in 30 seconds, the camera will remain on them for the remaining 60 seconds of their time.

"Additionally, there will be a sound sensor on the lights, such that,
the longer the silence emanating from the debater, the brighter and
hotter and yellower the overhead light on them becomes."
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